Between You And Me

"It's only a game"

2010-09-28T14:32:00.000-05:00

So last night was Bears vs Packers. To say it had been on my mind for most of the previous seven days doesn't do it justice. All day yesterday it was nearly all I could think about. Not just the game itself, but everything leading up to it. Who would I ask over, what food would I make, do I have enough liquor in my kitchen, is my place even clean enough for guest, etc.

Then the Packers lost.

End of the game I texted one of my friends and said it's a good thing my friends were leaving because I was on the verge of murdering someone. Her reply was, "Relax. It's just a game".

Yea, but...but....

She was right. In the immediate aftermath of the game I was equal parts disgusted, disappointed, stun(ned), and upset. Then I read her text, thought about it for a moment, and I sort of had this calm come over me. In the greater scheme of things, what happened last night wasn't the end of the world. I didn't rush to the internet to read and share reactions. I didn't call anyone to bitch about the coaching or the bad calls or the fumble. I basically let it go and turned on a movie.

In retrospect, I'm not certain I like that.

I know that being so passionate about something like an NFL game, or sports in general, isn't a good look. I don't like talking with strangers in the bar about the Packers. I would rather not debate Ted Thompson or the Brewers when I'm at a party where people are within earshot. I don't consider it a badge of honor that I could tell you stats from years ago or tell you what some DB ran at the combine in '06.

But sports has always been one of my big interests, and since blogs, comment areas and message boards took over the internet it's become increasingly easy to debate and discuss not only sports, but whatever you wish. With all this discourse comes a sense that you've invested part of your life to the game itself. You've spent so much time reading and writing about it that when the game finally ends, you feel legit emotions one way or another.

I thought about it today. Looking back at last night I felt a range of emotions that I rarely get to experience at any other time. Anxiousness, nervousness, outrage, contentment, elation. It comes with being diehard fan. I still don't buy excessive amounts of team gear, I don't mix it up with other fans, and I'm not some asshole like fucking Fireman Ed. He's a loser.

But when I hear, "It's just a game" I can acknowledge that she's right. It is only a game. It's a game played by athletes being paid millions who have no idea who I am and probably don't even care about the game they play as much as I and others like me do.

But I keep coming back to the emotions a game like last night brings out. Isn't that a good thing? Don't you want to feel that way every once in a while? Doesn't that make life just a little bit better? Doesn't the low you go through after a tough loss make the high after a huge win all the more sweeter? If I were being honest, I would say I feel sorry for people who don't care for sports. I feel pity for those who don't feel that range of emotions on a regular basis. Or at least every weekend in the fall.

Put this one at the top of your bucket list

2010-09-23T15:13:00.001-05:00

Last year, via the internets, I read about a crummy little indie flick called The Room. I was looking at a list of the worst movies of all time, and The Room made it. Comments made below the article backed it up, though not in a, "Avoid this film at all costs" kinda way. The overwhelming majority thought that it was maybe the one movie everyone should see before they die.

I'm hear to back that up.

The Room, as wikipedia describes it:

This independently produced film has been called "the Citizen Kane of bad movies" by some critics. Although the film's star, writer, producer and director Tommy Wiseau has claimed it to be a black comedy, other actors involved in the production believe it was supposed to be a melodramatic romance. Its bizarre lines, protracted sex scenes, nonsensical exterior shots, and infamous use of green-screen for "outdoor" rooftop scenes, are so laughable that it has gained a cult status, and regularly sells out midnight viewings at theaters in the United States, Canada, the United Kingdom and Australia.

It's one thing for a movie to be laughably bad. It's another to gain such a cult following that viewings turn into events. The midnight screenings started years ago in LA and have popped up all over the world. Thanks to blogs and Youtube, going to a midnight showing is like going to a party with dozens of strangers set on one common goal: ridiculing the holy shit out of this film. People yell insults, toss plastic cutlery at the screen during scenes in which an infamous piece of artwork appears, dress as the characters and even play football in the isles.

A Viewer's Guide to The Room.

A friend and I went last Saturday in Uptown Minneapolis. It was, perhaps, the most fun I've ever had. From the moment the movie started until after the credits rolled, the whole movie was a blast. Tears rolled down my face from laughing so hard. I had absolutely no inhibitions about yelling every chance I got. The amazing thing? I was stone-sober. I can't imagine what this film will be like when I'm drunk.

I can't stress how much you absolutely need to check this film out. Get on Netflix or Amazon and watch it at home first, preferably with other friends. Mock the movie senseless. Revel in how absurdly bad it is. Then get on Google, find out when it's playing in a nearby major market and go with some people. I'm absolutely going again, likely as early as next month. I've spread the gospel of The Room to co-workers and friends and we've got a growing number who are set to make the trip to Uptown again in October. Interested? HOLLA.

Oh hai, Mark.

Perfection.

2010-05-10T00:04:00.001-05:00

What a day. What a weekend! This afternoon brought an example of how social media connects so many and ended with me in tears.

I left Marshfield this afternoon and headed home for Eau Claire. Once I got in range I checked my phone for messages, checked email, checked Twitter to see what was going on in the world. I was still heading down Highway 10 when Bill Simmons tweeted, a little after 3:00...

Hey @lewkay - did you see Dallas Braden is perfect-gaming Tampa for your League of Dorks team right now? No baserunners. Nothing. Zero.

I read it a couple times to make sure I had him right.

Dallas Braden, the pitcher who had been involved with a war of words against Alex Rodriguez, was perfect through seven innings.

I got to Neilsville and found a parking lot. AT&T is shit between Marshfield and EC and I didn't want to miss history being made.

I listened to the last two innings, the Oakland radio feed, on the MLB app for the iPhone. They talked about Braden's tough upbringing. They talked about Braden losing his mother to cancer when he was in high school. They talked about how his grandmother raised him ever since.

When Kouzmanoff went into the dugout to make a catch in the 8th I was screaming at the radio. When I heard the dread in the A's announcer as Navarro hit a rope to left my heart sank, and subsequently rose, when Patterson caught the liner. On the final out I was going bat-shit crazy when the perfect game was sealed.

The perfect game is one of those things that can happen to any pitcher but so very rarely does. Only 19 have happened in the history of major league baseball. If you look down the list of those that experienced one, you see some greats, but not a lot of legends. Young, Hunter, Koufax and Johnson did it. But so did a lot of guys without electric stuff. A lot of the all-timers, guys like Pedro, Maddux, Clemmons, Ryan and Gibson never had one.

To throw a perfect game is incredibly special. It's something every sports fan can get behind and cheer. During the Brewers game in Arizona today they showed the final out on the big screen in the stadium and the crowd cheered. It's just one of those things you root for.

When you consider the circumstances, how could you not?

It wasn't until tonight, when I saw the replay of what happened after the game, that the waterworks started.

(be sure to watch from 3:20-6:00)

A new addition to the family

2010-05-07T15:50:00.001-05:00

1 - So my laptop bit the dust back in early April. I hate typing on my desktop at home and I was swamped at work last month. Hence, no blog writing.

But it's been way too long and this week has been slow so I'll make an attempt.

2 - Mark Cuban pens one of my favorite blogs. He's not in there writing something new every day but when he does, it's usually packed with information or thoughts or opinions I find fascinating.

This week he took on TV and the internet.

Entry one: The Future of TV is.......TV

Entry two: Will You Support Net Neutrality For Your House or Apartment Network

If you don't want to read either, I'll sum up what he's talking about because it deals with something I've been engaged in for years.

Cuban is using statistical data to show that not only are people purchasing the biggest and the best TVs they can afford, they're purchasing a lot of them. His theory is this is evidence that internet video, while obviously popular, is a fad and nothing more than something tech geeks get into. After all, when you invest in a 60" 1080p set you're going to want to take full advantage of it. Why would you watch this week's episode of Lost on your 24" computer monitor when you can check it out on this brand new set of yours over DirectTV or cable? Or why would you stream a movie over Netflix and watch something at significantly less quality when you could rent a Blu Ray or grab something from Video On Demand and see it with the quality that the creators intended?

His second blog again a swipe at internet video, albeit in another (less obvious) way. He's obviously seeing talk of how internet streaming of digital content could be the future in American homes and he's trying to provide a practical criticism, this one dealing with the issue of bandwidth. His stance is if people demand their media over the net, the cost for bandwidth will be astronomical and your typical family won't be able to afford the rates. He believes that families will have to have their own network manager to say who in the family can use the net and when, and who is really going to do that? Why bother with downloading games and movies over the net when cable and satellite offer thousands of options on demand?

Cuban is a very brilliant individual but I come down opposite him in both instances.

The second blog posting is either very ridiculous or I (and every one of his readers if the comments are an indication) am misunderstanding his point. I won't even touch the idea of Net Neutrality, because his blog certainly doesn't.

The problem I have with Cuban is the trade-off. He's talking convenience and quality. I would argue the convenience is negligible at best, and the quality (while less) is still very good while the cost and selection via internet video far outweighs the benefits of hard copies and VOD.

2b - Here's why.

I'm pretty typical of most people my age. I've got a TV I wish was a little bigger. I have high speed internet in my place with a wireless router. I have a satellite package with a lot of channels I don't watch. I subscribe to Netflix. I have a gaming system with games I don't play anymore. I have a nice receiver and sweet surround sound.

I'm the kind of guy that Charter or Comcast or AT&T or Time Warner or DirectTV or Netflix wants. For the last two years I've forked over thousands of dollars for service that I didn't need and in some cases really want.

That changed this week.

I canceled my DirectTV.

I called Charter and told them that I could no longer justify the $60 a month I was paying for internet and that I was going to go with AT&T DSL for half the price. Not only did the guy on the phone tell me he would change my price from $63 to $29, he locked in my price for two years and bumped my download speed from five megabytes to sixteen.

My next step was Netflix. Cancelled.

After that it was a trip to the Apple Store. I'd been researching wireless routers and settled on the latest Dual Band Airport Extreme. It would replace my two-year old Wireless G Linksys.

Went home, set it up and it was time to test.

Using my PS3, my now blazing fast internet connection and bitchin' router I followed the steps here and selected an old episode of Veronica Mars. After five seconds of buffering, I was watching very near DVD quality content. BAM.

Now, to Mark's credit, this is exactly what he was talking about in his first post:

I'm not exactly using the path of least resistance. I have to use my PS3 as a web browser. Without a keyboard and mouse it takes a couple minutes to navigate to the TV show or movie I prefer. I'm sacrificing a little quality because I'm at the mercy of whomever ripped this file. I'd say that it's damn close to DVD quality, much better than standard definition, much worse than HD. I'm relying on multiple devices; the user he envisions only needs a cablebox or satellite receiver and a TV.

However, I weigh those negatives versus the positives:

1 - I'm not paying $90 a month for DirectTV and $10-50 a month for Netflix.
2 - I'm not worrying about returning a disk to a Red Box or BlockBuster.
3 - I don't have to worry about what I want to watch already being checked out.
4 - I don't have to wait six months for this week's episode of Supernatural to be out on DVD, I can get it thirty minutes after it airs.
5 - I don't have to get in a car to pick up my media.
6 - The online library is substantially larger than whatever you'll find at your local rental store or whatever is playing using OnDemand.
7 - New releases, and by that I mean those that are still in the theater, are often available online months before they become available on DVD or OnDemand. Last night I watched a DVD quality version of The Losers. That's been out, what, two weeks?
8 - I'm doing this without the use of file sharing apps like BitTorrent and I'm not responsible for any illegal activity. It's the same as running a search on Google Video and watching content there. It's the person who's hosting the file on their server that's liable.
9 - If I do want to download a copy for myself, it's as easy as changing a setting in my Divx online player and caching a version on my hard drive. From there I can watch it on my iMac before bed or stream it to my PS3 over my new high speed connection.

THE drawback in this setup is very simple: live sports, particularly those in your market. If I want to watch the Brewers or Bucks or Packers my options are either find a shitty delayed stream and watch on my computer, or go to a bar.

But come on. Honestly, is having an excuse to go to your favorite pub really the worst thing in the world?

3 - Work has been on my mind a lot lately. Stretches like this come and go. When I'm busy I feel indispensable. When I'm not I wake up worrying if I'm going to get laid off.

It's a shitty feeling. It's tough when you don't trust your management enough to understand that some weeks I'm going to be ahead of my work cue and have little to bill out. Other weeks I could be slammed and at work ten hours a day. There's just not that much consistency when we're talking about the nature of what I do.

Right now I'm in one of those lulls and it's made me consider what I'm doing here in Eau Claire and how long it can last.

Would I love to stay? Put down some roots and really feel like I'm starting the rest of my life? Hell yes. I like this town. In the summer the golfing is outstanding. The weather is great. My brother, and soon my sister, live here. I'm within a short drive to all the family and friends I love. The winters are sort of dog shit but there are options. I could take up ice fishing, I guess.

But I don't think that's likely to happen. Odds are I'm going to have to move to a more metropolitan area at some point, I just don't know when.

4 - If you could do whatever you want, if you were given a chance to do it all over and start a different career, would you?

That's another thought that's been floating around in my head.

When I was fifteen or so I remember vividly sitting in my dad's office back in Marshfield. I was talking to him about a project our high school made you complete, one in which you focused on a potential career and a plan to get there. I was talking to the old man about what he thought might work for me and his first words were,

"Don't be a teacher".

This caught me off guard, for obvious reasons. I was sitting in the office of the Superintendent of Schools. He had been a teacher. His dad had been a teacher and principal of a high school. His brother was a principal. His sister was an elementary school teacher.

So when he said the family business shouldn't be on my mind, I crossed it off. I trusted his thought process. After all, it made sense. I was always the kid who knew everything about computers and technology. I was the kid in elementary school librarians took out of class when they couldn't get the printer to work or the Mac froze on them. The kid who jumped into the Senior High's network from home and played around with teacher files when he was 12 years old. The kid who spent years in the technology lab instead of the weight room.

I was a geek, and the Tech Boom was just starting. My dad thought the life of a teacher would be a waste and I'd be better off using my technical skills to conquer the industry. Run a network, build web sites, consult...something.

So I did, and to be honest I make a good living doing what I do. I enjoy it. But if I had it to do all over again I'd trade all of this to teach.

My brother and I live together. Every day I hear about the little shits he teaches in his 4th grade class. The athletes he coaches for varsity football. The anticipation in his voice when spring break or summer vacation comes up. Not gonna lie, I'm incredibly envious.

When you're fifteen years old you don't think about things like industry layoffs or tech trends or how the economy might be when you're 10 or 15 years older. You don't think about what occupations will be in demand or which occupations will always be needed.

If I were able to take a time machine back and give myself some advice I'd say look into two things:

1 - Teaching
2 - Cooking

I'd have loved to been a Tech or English teacher, and I'd have equally loved to own, operate and cook in my own restaurant.

Also, maybe a divorce lawyer too. Couples I know are dropping like flies. With the divorce rate the way it is, those bastards have to be making money hand over fist.

5 - One mistake I avoided was sports journalism.

I obviously like to write. I always have. I think I'm decent at it. When I was younger I used to dream I was like one of the scribes in Dan Jenkins novels, having a byline at a major newspaper or magazine.

I romanticized the notion of watching an event and working my ass off to fax home my recap or article (typed on an old Smith-Corona) on a deadline, a bottle of cheap scotch next to me.

"Outlined against a blue-gray October sky..." and all that shit. Yea, I wanted to be Grantland Rice.

Grantland Rice, however, would be in serious danger of losing his job in 2010. These days, in the age of blogs, message boards, twitter and instant box scores, it's not uncommon to have the average fan know more than the reporters that cover the team. Combine that with the massive problems facing the newspaper industries and some of the nation's best writers have been left out in the cold.

Take, for example, Hall of Fame reporter Hal McCoy. In 2009, after 47 years on the job, the Dayton Daily News decided they could no longer afford a beat writer to follow the Cincinnati Reds and McCoy was forced to retire.

Read his farewell column here.

It's sad, and I'm a reason he was forced out.

These days, I know about something long before it ever gets to print or TV. My desktop twitter app sees to that.

Yesterday I got an Adam Schefter tweet that Lawrence Taylor had been arrested for rape. At that point there was no mention on ESPN.com. There was nothing on TV. But inside of 15 minutes the story was everywhere except the print media. By the time the story hit the shelves the next day it was old news.

This problem isn't unique to sports, obviously. It's the nature of the news industry.

I implore you to read this outstanding blog post by the wife of a long-time newsman. It's a bit heartbreaking, but you won't be able to take your eyes away.

6 - If you happen to find yourself in the Eau Claire area and you're the kind of person who likes to swing the golf club, you owe it to yourself to play Wild Ridge.

I can't even begin to describe how amazing the conditions are at that course right now. It's early May, and they're incredible.

I've played a lot of courses in Wisconsin and Minnesota, and right now I don't think I'd take another track.

If you're a golfer in Minneapolis or Marshfield or Wausau or wherever and you're looking for an awesome experience, check it out and look me up. It's not even pricey. Twilight rate is $20.

7 - A links roundup.

• A pain every man will feel.

• JESUS CHRIST WALKS (and gets hit by a car)

• This is the coolest thing you will see today.

• What Makes a Fart. I LOL'd like a bastard.

• Time Magazine's 50 best Youtube Videos

8 - And lastly, allow me to welcome the newest addition to the King family.

He's my sister's new lab. His name is Cooper. He's eight weeks old. He's the cutest thing alive.

Keep your feet on the ground while your head's in the clouds

2010-04-05T00:24:00.001-05:00

1a - This has been one hell of a weekend. I have to think it's rare to experience the range of emotion I went through in a span of 48 hours, the highs and lows, the inspiring and the debilitating, and come out of it all feeling like you got yourself a fucking win. I did.

This last week(s) has been dominated by thoughts of a pretty young lady I've recently been demolished by. There will probably be a blog about her at some point, I'm just not ready to write one up yet. Wounds are pretty fresh.

But whatever, forget the girl, this entry is about a moment I'll never forget for the rest of my life.

Anyone who golfs often has played out in their head the scenario that unfolded tonight. I've done it countless number of times. The situation is this:

You hit a beautiful drive on a par three or a par four. You know that you hit it well, and you know it was heading for the pin. Unfortunately you couldn't quite see the landing zone so you have about a minute or two in-between the drive and when you make it to the green where you can imagine what would happen if the ball actually made it into the pin. You approach the green, you look around, you don't see the ball and all of the sudden you stop and think,

"Check the cup".

You slowly move toward the pin, look down and there it is. That little dimpled ball that you know you'll have for the rest of your life.

Well, it happened tonight.

I had been driving the ball well. On number one I nearly drove the green on a par four despite missing most of the ball. On number three, a par five, I crushed the drive and had nothing but a seven iron to make it home in two.

Then came number four. What makes this situation special, besides the outcome, is that the shot was blind. I couldn't see the green because there's a bunker 50 yards in front, blocking the view. If you're a big hitter you can carry the bunker, or you can pull an iron and hit your shot to the left and chip on. It's not a long par four by any means, and there's times I'll pull the four iron and lay-up, leaving an easy pitch to the green. But I'd been hitting the ball well tonight so I grabbed the lumber and hit my drive.

Unlike my previous few drives, this one was more of a liner. Also unusual, I actually watched this drive through; when I hit a good drive I typically watch it for a second, turn and grab my clubs and start walking before the ball has even stopped. With this drive I watched it land, presumably on or just short of the green, take one bounce and disappear.

Now, here's where the above scenario in your head plays out. I actually started thinking how amazing it would be if the shot actually went in. Walking up the fairway I made note of what song was playing in my ear-buds (Motley Crew - Home Sweet Home), what time it was (6:21 pm) and thought to myself how I didn't see a second bounce. It was heading straight for the pin, bounced once and I didn't see the ball again. So for those 60 seconds or so I allowed myself the fantasy that I might have just hit my first hole in one (on a par four none the less!).

Still, I never really believed it went in. It's like any other fantasy; fun to think about, never actually anticipated.

When I got to the bunker and looked at the green, I didn't see the ball. This wasn't much of a big deal; I figured it bounced on the green and hopped somewhere off, maybe under a tree behind the green or in the rough.

I put my clubs down and walked over the green, trying to spy my ball. No dice. I gave a quick glance under a couple of pines, but they didn't line up to where I thought my shot landed. I checked the nearby rough and didn't see anything.

Then the thought hit me: "Check the cup".

Like I had envisioned so many times in the past, I slowly approached the hole, still not really letting the thought of a hole in one enter my head.

Then I saw it, that little white Top Flight 3, and the air left the building (course).

You know how when you watch Wimbledon and the winner yells and drops to their knees? It isn't a show. Their knees literally give out. I know this now. I let out a yell and was on my knees in less than a second.

I just stared at it for a couple moments. At first I was in shock. Then disbelief. I quickly questioned whether or not that could really be my ball. The notion was in and out of my head in a heartbeat.

That motherfucker was mine.

I didn't dare touch it. My pulse was going a mile a minute and I was excited like I'd won the lottery, but my first thought was to take a picture. I fumbled for the iPhone and snapped one.

Next thought was to call my dad. I dialed home and my sister picked up. I could barely breathe the words, "Get dad". She did, and I told him the story. He was excited and asked if anyone besides me saw it.

There's the rub, folks.

I already talked about how much I love golfing alone in the evenings. Music playing, alone with my thoughts, working out any frustrations I'd have. Unfortunately you don't consider the issue of hitting the best shot of your life, a shot so few experience in the entire world, and then not having anyone to witness it.

I didn't care. I already knew the answer to his question. There were only a half dozen other golfers at Mill Run this evening, at least as far as I could see. The sun was on its way down, it was a holiday, there was a little chill in the air. I did a quick survey of the land but it was pointless: no one saw this shot but me.

I told the old man I didn't give a shit, that I'd know and that's all I cared about. He laughed, agreed, told me congratulations and I hung up.

Next call was to my brother and I got a similar reaction. He was golfing with me earlier in the day at a different course and judging how I'd played those nine holes at Princeton I'm sure he was more shocked than I was.

When I hung up I finally reached in to grab the ball. I put it in a pocket in the bag where it wouldn't get mixed up with another and continued my round.

2 - The circumstances regarding this shot may not be of interest to most, but I had to consider them.

I'd already played two other rounds of golf this weekend, once in Neilsville yesterday and another time today, the aforementioned round with Ben at Princeton. Both times Ben and I were behind incredibly slow players that wouldn't let us play though.

Ben doesn't let that bother him; it pisses the motherfuck out of me.

I'm the guy who'll get road-rage and tailgate or flip off old people who suck at driving. I'll frustratingly drop four letter words in the middle of a meeting or in a silent Production area while people are working. I used to give up home runs and if I thought the batter was taking too much time jogging his ass around the bases I'd plunk the next batter in the back, on the rare occasion in the helmet.

When it comes to golf, I wear my emotions on my sleeve and nothing infuriates me more than when a group of fucksticks let their pride get in the way of golf etiquette. Both yesterday and today Ben and I were behind absolutely awful players. But while he'd play at a nice, easy pace and sit and wait while the people in front of us dribbled their way up the course, I stayed on their asses.

I'd meet up with their groups on the tee-box, stand fifteen feet from the box with my arms folded over my chest and stare. When these packs of fucking elephants hit their shots and drove away without offering to let us play through I'd sit on the front of the box, on the ground, and watch every one of their shots, knowing damn well it's making their group uncomfortable. When they got a good 350 yards out I'd hit my drive as far and as hard as I could and watch with a combination of rage, arrogance and glee as it rolled up to their group.

Shove it up their asses, Ben and I'd say.

Unfortunately, it also kills my round. I'm not good when I'm pissed off. This afternoon I was feeling dejected, wanted to go alone but Ben tagged along. I didn't even finish the round at Princeton. I was too pissed off and I waited while Ben completed his nine.

But golfing alone is different. I'm out there simply to be out there. Typically I'll run into groups that let me play through when needed, but whether my round takes one our or three I don't care. I like the idea of playing with a goal and some focus, but not for the sake of competing against anyone or anything. I just play to play and spend time out-doors.

3 - I almost didn't go tonight. Like I said, I'd already played nine with Ben this afternoon and stunk up the course.

But I'd come back to my place, watched some BSG and the choice became:

a: waste an evening in-doors
b: go back out and work out the emotional shit bugging me

and I chose b.

4 - Megan is back and working another summer at WR/ML.

Dope.

5 - When I finished the nine holes I stopped in the clubhouse and bought the bar a round. The patrons were almost as happy as I was.

6 - The ball is sitting on a shelf in my room, I'll figure out what to do with it later.

7 - It feels a little weird. Again, if you don't do a lot of golfing you might not give it a lot of thought. But courses here have been open for two weeks and I've already been out golfing a dozen times. It's my single favorite thing to do, and has been for as long as I can remember. Hitting a hole in one has always been my big goal. I didn't imagine it happening on a par four, but it did and now it's like a big check has been marked off on the bucket list or something.

Links roundup - Brewers, Chad Ochocinco, Texas Sucks and an Elephant

2010-03-19T16:52:00.001-05:00

Not a lot of original material in this one. In fact there's really basically none.

But it's the end of the week and here's a collection of links and vids that amused, concerned, caused me to think, and made me horny.

I'll let you decide which ones did which.

(in no particular order)

• If you click only one link, make it this one - Tiger Woods is whiter than I am.

• Student news paper publishes salaries and people lose their shit. I don't know why but reading the comments just brought a huge smile to my face. Faculty is pissed off that their salaries, most of which is paid for by the public, is now out in the open. Tax payers are pissed because educators are making so much. Makes for great reading.

• CNN writes how Apple can succeed with the iPad. - I'm on the fence until I see some killer software.

• How to get more done - Personally I might just get a prescription for Aderal

• For my fellow RealGM'rs - Guy posts on rival message board, administrator gets the IP and tracks it to his company, original guy gets in deep shit, message board people everywhere shit themselves. Also, Buckeyes are douchebags.

• Deadspin and the Brewers - Will Leach previews (not really) the Brewers. Those who hate LaRussa will be amused.

• Texas being Texas - Can we just let Texas secede from the Union? It's a big state. I've been there three times. There's plenty of room for all the backwards-ass ignorant morons from states like Mississippi, West Virginia, etc. How about they just move to Texas and form their own country.

• FUCKING ASSHOLES - Texas can have the tea-baggers too.

• Equal parts awesome and gross - Elephant gives birth

• The only thing missing from the tourney so far - This is the best thing of all time. Gus Johnson is now going to narrate the rest of my life. Or at least the rest of the Tourney.

Lastly, I'm going to share with you the words of wisdom from Chad Ochocinco. Via Twitter:

- Yall ever seen a chick with a nice pair of heels but its like 3 inches of room left in the back because they aint her size, BORROWED

- Remember when you took the time to study for a test and was cocky as hell the next day cause you knew you was gone ace that shit?

- Remember when you put on that new outfit, new shoes with a lil cash in yo pocket and u had a car wash--couldn't nobody tell u shhh!

- Remember when you finally got the courage to holla at the chick you been liking in school n she agree to go out with you n yo SWAGG CHANGE

- Remember when you used to get loud on purpose just to get her attention in school but she never paid yo ass no mind? *handraised*

- Remember when you got a haircut and felt like you was GODS GIFT to women? Something bout a haircut just make you feel GREAT

- Remember when you saw the chick you liked and you walk by and pretend you don't see her knowing damn well you got a crush on her?

- Fellas- you know that feeling when you got on that fresh outfit, haircut ,new shoes and 20 dollars for u and her mcdonalds, #BALLIN

- LADIES- you got your hair done, brand new dress, with yo accessories,shoes with the purse to match with no money<--dudes buy drinks- #ilostmyvirginity a long time ago and I can't find the chick who took advantage of me!!

Enjoy the weekend, go Bucky.

A woman can have the same effect

2010-03-16T14:18:00.000-05:00

My first round of golf yesterday started the same way it ended five months ago. With a mammoth drive and some guy behind me saying, "Holy shit...".

I was playing alone so the twosome on the first tee-box let me start ahead of them. I hadn't taken a swing since October. When I stepped up to hit I had to give the obligatory warning that the the drive could be pretty brutal.

"Hey man, we're all in the same boat today," one of them said. "It just means we get to laugh at you first". Har-har-har...

After I hit a piss-rocket that sailed over the green on the 292 yard par four, they stood there, mouth agape, while I said, "Thanks fellas, have a good round". Moments like that are just one of the many reasons I love playing the game.

There aren't a lot of guys out there who can consistently hit the ball like I can. I've only played with two, my dad and my brother. Like most kids, I mimicked what my dad did when I was little. Well, my dad has one of the sweetest golf swings this side of the PGA. When he put clubs in my hand when I was three years old, his was the swing I copied and it's largely remained unchanged since then. Combine 25 years of repetition and muscle-memory and you get a golfer who can hit the ball further than almost anyone else who steps on the course.

It's such a mental game, maybe more so for me. I don't focus on my shots. I don't line up yardage or take wind into account. When I'm golfing I'm not focusing on golf. I'm thinking about everything peripheral. Like I described much earlier in the blog, I'm susceptible to some really shitty golf. If I'm in a crap mood or I'm stressed or I've been destroyed by my job it's going to manifest itself into some abysmal shots. Physically everything looks the same with my swing; the ball just doesn't obey. I don't know how else to explain it.

Yesterday could have gone either way. For one, it was the first round of the year and not a lot is going to go right after a five month layoff. The second thing was my recent romantic interest. It had been the very definition of an up and down weekend with her and while if ended great, you never know the effect a woman is going to have on your golf swing. She'd been on my mind for days and it's not like I can turn that off when I step up to hit a shot.

Hell, I wouldn't want to.

Golfing alone, iPod playing tunes in my earbuds, walking eighteen holes might be my favorite thing in the world to do. It's two and a half hours of just being alone with my thoughts, enjoying great weather outside, nothing else to worry about in the world. It works wonders if I want to blow off steam or get away from whatever's burdening my mind. Pissed off at my job? Golf 18. By the fourth hole my game will be so shitty I'm no longer thinking about asshole clients or frustrating code. Instead I'm dwelling on how I could have possibly hit two straight in the pond and missed an easy four footer.

But like I said, a woman on your mind can be a positive or a negative. No way to predict it until you take that first swing with an iron.

I stuck it. Par three, 160 yards, I pulled the nine and dropped one six yards from the pin. My game didn't let up the rest of the evening. I went par, par, birdie, par, par, birdie over the next six holes. I'm lucky to have a run like that in the middle of the summer on my 40th round of the year. What I did yesterday was Brandon Jennings going off for 55. When I got home in two on a long par five (with a six iron none the less) I giggled. Some of my shots yesterday were just stupid.

It's a nice feeling when your mind is 100 miles away and you're still able to roll a shitty course on your first round of the year.

It's gotta be the woman.

Lupe, Roger Ebert, inspiration and Abraham Lincoln killing vampires

2010-03-04T11:56:00.000-06:00

1 - I'd never heard of this author or the book before, but now I really have to read this.

2 - By now most people have heard about the Esquire piece on Roger Ebert. It's pretty awesome.

But what I didn't know is he's on Twitter. I started following him late last night and I've come to the conclusion that's he's basically my idol.

3 - For my guy pals, it's worth a look

3b -

A short-brimmed fedora is heroic and hip. And you might have noticed, they’re also back in style—whether in wool (for the winter) or straw (for the summer).

My lovely pal Danielle says it's ok if I take full credit for bringing this back.

4 - So I know in my last post I said that fictional television isn't going to enlighten you. I never said it couldn't inspire you, however.

Our Content department has been hit with massive turnover in the last six months. None of the people who worked as content specialists when I arrived at SP are here any longer. They all quit. Not only that, but the people that have been hired to replace them have quit.

It's a bitch of a job, and one that I want.

Two weeks ago I went to our CFO. I mentioned to her that I'd heard yet another Specialist turned in his two weeks. It left us with only one person in a department that really demands at least three. Being a former English major and more than capable of handling both Flash and Content duties, I suggested to her that I could help if I was needed. She gave me a, "Thanks. We'll think about that." response and I left her office knowing full well that, no it wouldn't be considered.

This is typical. A lot of companies will preach change and that they need ideas and they need their employees to do more. In the end, a lot of it never happens despite the best intentions of the workers. Months ago we had a company wide meeting where we came up with plans to change our processes for the better. I was encouraged. That happened in January and I'm still waiting on the follow-up. Very little, if anything, has changed. The meeting was mostly bullshit.

So when I had this talk with the CFO and told her how I could be useful, I didn't really expect anything to come of it.

Fast forward about a week. It was around 1:00 am and I was starting to fall asleep to an episode of House. In it, one of the doctors wanted to do clinical trials. He asked House if he could take on this added responsibility. House said no. At the end of the episode the doc tried again, only this time he didn't ask permission, he flat told House he would be doing the trials. House said sure, go ahead. Confused, the doc asked why it was now alright. House said that when he said no, it was because he was asked. This time around he just did it.

The light went on in my head.

The next morning I got to work and crafted an email. Not to my boss, but to the company president. I didn't ask for an expanded role, I more or less told him I'd be taking it. I elaborated as to why. "I've been doing this for almost a dozen years"... "I'm the best writer on your staff"... "I'm an expert in our admin with knowledge of..."

I didn't get a response. Not for three days, at least. When I did get one it was a mixture of appreciation and shock. Management didn't even know I had any writing ability. They didn't know what my program in college was. They didn't understand that in my previous jobs I was not only expected to do Flash work, but also handle email campaigns and do design and write copy and code web pages.

Well, they know now. And I'll be starting in Content in the coming weeks.

5 - My newish role here left me a little more encouraged. I'm also seeing a few of my coworkers follow suit for their own reasons. I'm noticing a shift. People are doing less talking, less discussing, more doing. If they see a need for a change in a process, they're just adjusting and working a solution in on the fly instead of taking it up the ladder and hoping for a response. I like it.

5b - I extended my lease. I want to see where this is heading. The Cities can wait a bit longer.

6 - Guys, I gotta share with you the easiest meal you'll ever make. This is for my pals who aren't cooks who rely on frozen pizza and takeout.

Buy a slow cooker. You can get a serviceable one at Wal-Mart for under $30 bucks.

Next, the ingredients.

Go to your local butcher or meat show or a good grocery store. Look for about 2.5 lbs of sirloin tip roast. Find a leaner cut of meat, one without much fat.

Carrots
Celery
Onion
3 bakers potatoes
Frozen peas
Frozen corn
Two packages of McCormick beef stew seasoning

Chop up the meat into 1 inch by 1 inch pieces and add it to the cooker.

Add four or five chopped celery sticks and four or five carrots sticks.

Chop up about a half a yellow onion and add it.

Peel, chop and add the potato.

You only need half of what's in the two bags, so add that and save the rest for another day.

Add one of the packages of seasoning and give all the ingredients a toss with some tongs. Repeat this with the second package.

Add about a cup and a half of water.

Cover with the lid, turn the cooker on to the Slow setting, and forget about it for the next six hours. When the time's up you get this:

So. Fucking. Good. And it's more or less the easiest thing in the world to make.

7 -

When it comes to music, I'm usually either really early on a band or artist or I'm really late.

I was pretty late on my latest musical obsession. I abhor the state of major label hip hop, but I absolutely love Lupe Fiasco. A few weeks ago I started listening to "The Cool".

It's awesome. Best hip-hop album I've heard since God Loves Ugly.

Standout track, "Streets On Fire"

Olympics, Trade Deadline, Asshole Clients and Emma Anzai

2010-02-23T15:47:00.001-06:00

1 - There are a few days every year that I absolutely love, none of which include national holidays or birthdays. Nope, they are (in order):

• Day one of the NFL Draft
• NBA trade deadline
• The NBA Draft

That's it. Those are the three days. You can have your Christmas, New Years and birthdays. I'll take the chaos and coverage of the above.

Last Thursday happened to be one of those days, and it didn't disappoint. The NBA trade deadline came and went at 3:00 pm that afternoon, and the event wound up being a fascinating example of how social media and the internet have changed sports.

You had:

• Blogs being updated by the minute
• NBA boards getting so many views that servers were crashing
• Twitter absolutely blowing the fuck up

Apologies to my company, but this was my day

- a Firefox window with about four tabs open: Twitter, RealGM, ESPN, SI. Read one site, click to the next and hit refresh, read updates, move to the next tab. When there was a new Tweet (averaged about four new a minute) click back to read the updates. When there was a new rumor or information it was back to RealGM to read or post. Thousands or people took place today.

Quick example: That morning I created a new thread on RealGM regarding a rumor between the Bucks and Sixers. Inside of three minutes it had 55 views and a dozen responses. In nine minutes there was 260 views. As of 7:00 pm that night there were a staggering 403 responses and 5703 views.

This was a typical NBA deadline day. But what upped the ante this year was Twitter.

I went to lunch with friends that afternoon. I kept up with Twitter on my phone. At one point my entire home page were tweets made in the last two minutes. All were trade rumors and updates.

Every writer, especially those from ESPN, wants to get credit for breaking even the most benign news. So instead of insiders and writers getting a report and publishing the information in an article or a blog, you had them updating Twitter seconds after hearing the information.

For information junkies like myself and those on RealGM, this stuff is our crack. Get an update, share the info on the board, read reactions and comment. Wash, rinse, repeat all day. Around 11:05 that morning RealgM servers crashed. This happens every year on the draft and deadline days. But the fact that it's expected doesn't make it any less excruciating. Around the time that it went down today coincided with the rumor that the Bucks were sending our a draft pick in a trade. It was awful news and it had to be discussed, only our outlet was down. The next twenty minutes were absolutely horrendous. I felt like a junkie desperate for a fix I couldn't get. When the servers went back online, within a minute there were hundreds of new posts. Just like myself, you had people hitting refresh every thirty seconds hoping the servers were working again.

One of my first entries in this blog dealt with information addiction. Today was Exhibit A.

2 - Speaking of information addiction and social media, someone alert NBC that it's no longer 1990.

The Olympics have been bashed so much in the last two weeks I won't bother kicking this long-dead dog. Much.

The Olympics are about stories, not sports. Nobody cares about curling or ice dancing or snowboarding or skiing. In three weeks they could show Bode Miller in some competition in California and no one would turn in.

But in the Olympics, people will tune in for the story. If you know who he is, you know that four years ago he was shut-out from any medals and left Italy an embarrassment. The story this year was one of redemption. People wanted to see how he would bounce back. Key word there is "see".

Unfortunately, NBC didn't televise a single run of his live. Every one was tape-delayed into prime-time. Same with Lindsay Vonn, the sweetheart of this year's Olympics. Or Lindsey Jacobellis, the snowboarder also looking for redemption. I left work a half hour early last week because I figured that while they probably wouldn't show her run on NBC, surely they would have it live on CNBC or MSNBC. Nope. I got Curling and hockey.

NBC paid a lot of money for these games. They've lost cash by the boatload, even with huge ratings. If they feel like they have to put the marquee day events in prime-time, fine. Whatever. But at least give the public an avenue to watch live if they wish. Why can't they broadcast over the internet? They'll show cross country skiing on their website but not the Women's Super-G?

I'm on the internet all day. I read blogs, I'm on Twitter, on Facebook. So are millions. It's virtually impossible to shut yourself out of the coverage. When I know how Vonn and Miller and Jacobellis did hours before their events are televised, it removes any reason for me to tune in that night.

2b - This was a well thought out blog on the subject, I thought.

3 - Sunday night represented just another massive fuck-up by NBC. The USA vs Canada hockey match is one of, if not the major event of the games. It wound up being as exhilarating a sporting event as you'll find anywhere. The last five minutes my pulse was going a mile a minute and it wasn't like I was one of the few. Twitter and the boards were going bat-shit crazy too. It brought cynical "I've seen it all" sports writers to the point of using shitty punctuation – I'm guessing they were excited.

Where was it being broadcast? MSNBC, in standard definition for 80% of the viewing public. What was on NBC? Fucking ice dancing. The performances weren't even for a medal, either.

Nice work, NBC. The best US hockey moment since Miracle on Ice and you put it on Rachel Madow's network.

4 - Not a lot of websites surprise me anymore.

This, however, was one of 'em.

I clicked on Wisconsin, then 2000, then UW vs LSU. Two seconds later I'm looking at a commercial free stream of the Badgers vs Tigers 2000 NCAA tournament game. Mike Kelly, Andy Kowskie, Mark Vershaw.

Jaw on the ground I let out a mind-blown, "Ho-ly-shit...". think I had a tear in my eye. I'm not even kidding.

Hundreds of full NCAA games over the last ten years. Recaps, results, highlights. It's a college basketball fan's dream.

5 - Roger Goodell: Get bent.

NFL: Fuck you, you pricks.

Above I mentioned my favorite three days of the year. My #1 is easily the first day of the NFL draft. I don't know what it's like to be a woman anticipating her wedding, but I have to think how I feel about that late Saturday every April is roughly the same. Each year is roughly the same. Wake up, make a trip to the gas station for a frozen pizza and a sixer, grab the local paper and settle in for roughly seven hours of NFL coverage. Follow along online, on ESPN, on Sirius and the NFL Network. I absorb it all.

In the past day one of the draft started 11:00 am central and went three rounds. This was perfect.

Last season, Roger Goodell decided to tinker with it a bit.

*pause...breathe...*

They moved it back three hours and pushed round three back to the second day. This wasn't a good move. Nobody liked it. Roger Goodell, in his first NFL draft, was fucking with something holy to a shit-ton of NFL fans.

But we got over it.

However, what we won't get over is this fucking travesty that Goodell set up this year. This April, the draft will no longer be on a Saturday. Instead, the draft's first round is to be held in primetime on a Thursday. Rounds two and three will be on Friday night. The remaining four rounds will be held on Saturday. There won't be any Sunday coverage.

It pisses me off just thinking about it.

Think I'm overreacting, check out just one website when the news was released. 341 comments, the overwhelming negative.

"way to destroy something that was perfect the way it was."

"The weekend draft has been a tradition in my household. We spent the weekend cooking (making spaghetti sauce,etc) and watching. With it in the evening we will probably record it and flip through. Not interested in the new time."

"i liked waking up on saturday jacked and weatching the countdown waiting for the draft to begin it was alota fun that weekend, and now the best rounds are on thursday and friday nites, wow, the NFL is all about the ratings and money Goodell doesnt care about the fans"

"This is stupid. All year long I can't wait for the NFL draft. It has Been a weekend tradition."

"I have not heard a fan say a good thing about this. It's just a money grab by the NFL. The suits decided they don't care what the fans want."

Ugh.

6 - I originally wanted to get this post up in the middle of the last week. One reason why is Epic Beard Man.

If you're not a frequent crawler of blogs and Twitter, you can be forgiven for missing this last Tuesday or Wednesday. But you owe it to yourself to check out the following:

Epic Beard Man Beats up Kid

Epic Beard Man - Part II

Absolutely remarkable. I mean, the old guy is built like a brick shit-house. He's wearing a shirt that says " I am a Motherfucker". And some kid is talking smack to him?

I loved the Mortal Kombat remix seen at the bottom of the second link. I crack up every time I hear, "Bring Amber Lamps".

6b - Speaking of Deadspin, they're now doing a Balls Deep Mailbag every Tuesday AND Thursday.

*single tear*

Last week I timed it. I started a mailbag around 4:00. By the time I was done reading it and the comments it was 5:00. There were a few moments spent checking another site and a few more minutes getting up to get a soda, but in the end that's one hour of my day spent reading letters to the editor like...

Q: Why don't they make Bailey's Irish Cream without alcohol, so I can enjoy it in the morning without having to go to work drunk? It's simply better than anything else you can put in coffee.
A: Why is the alcohol a problem? The real question you should be asking is why they don't make regular cream WITH alcohol.

I'm of the mind that, unless you like White Russians and Black Russians, no one over the age of 25 ever needs to drink Bailey's or Kahlua. That's the shit you drink when you're 14 and you're too much of a pussy to have acquired a taste for scotch.

or....

Q: I am a first time father and my son is 11 months old. His favorite show is Jacks Big Music show on Nick Jr. It is fucking brutal. God I hate children's television. Anyways, on one particular episode Lisa Loeb does a little music video. I found myself thinking that she looked pretty damned cute. I think it's something about the glasses. Am I a horrible person for wanting to fire off some knuckle children to a children's show? Will I now be on some sort of government list for even asking the question?

A; No, it's okay. You are an adult, and that means you are allowed to enjoy children's shows on an adult level, even if that includes picturing Lisa Loeb as a very sexy librarian who is about to throw back her hair and ride you like a carousel. YOU SAY…

Enjoy.

7 - I can't vouch for the following two sites unless you own a Mac and have AdBlock plus. They might be shady on a PC. I don't know.

But NinjaVideo.net and GotMovies.net are freaking fantastic. I've already mentioned NinjaVideo. Great for all the new movies and TV shows. They've got a good amount of old TV too.

That said, GotMovies blows them out of the water in terms of content. I've been using the site for a week and I've yet to not find a TV episode or movie I searched for.

In the last three days Ben and I have watched old school MacGyver episodes and these three obscure flicks from our youth that we just randomly wanted to check out.

OK, our choice in movies as kids were basically shit. We get that now.

But the point is that those are three flicks our local Blockbuster doesn't carry and we were able to get them in 20 minutes online. For free. In DVD quality.

I love technology.

8 - The only reason I found the above site is my obsession with all things Olivia Wilde reminded me of how awesome The OC was. I lost my DVDs years ago so I ran a search for episodes online and found GotMovies.

The OC was awesome. One of my friends left season one at my place when I was a senior in college. One weekend I started watching and didn't stop for three days. Eventually my other pals were hooked too. We never missed an episode.

One reason for this is obvious. The eye candy was ridiculous. Mischa Barton, Rachel Bilson, Olivia Wilde, Autumn Reeser...yea.

But that gets old. The reason the OC was so awesome was the writing. It was legitimately laugh out loud funny. It was trashy and sordid. It was the very definition of a guilty pleasure and usually you got it all in every scene.

Watch it. Start from episode one. You'll be hooked. Fictional TV isn't supposed to enlighten or make you a better person. In the end it's just entertainment and I guarantee you The OC will deliver that.

9 - Might be moving on from here relatively soon.

My original plan was to stick it out in EC through the spring, see how things were looking and make a decision around May. But Friday may have been a tipping point.

We have had a good number of awful clients, for a lot of different reasons. This client (I can't say who), however, is made up of purely awful individuals. We've bent over backwards for them time and time again. We acquiesce to their every demand. In the end, nothing is good enough. We build something one way and they hate it, despite it being exactly what they wanted. We design something and they sign off. A month later when it's ready to go they change their minds. We have meetings where things are specifically hammered out and a week later it's like they remember nothing.

Everyone has been hit by 'em. Our content specialist, designer, even our company owner. On Friday it was my turn.

I won't get into specifics, but I was destroyed. I actually left early that day. I took my beat-down over something that was their fault, and just went home. For almost that entire night I couldn't think of anything else. Just how these people, these fucking assholes, could be so terrible to others and irrational when it comes to working with an agency.

I was worried it would ruin my weekend. But then Friday night happened and I had a new reason to be pissed off on Saturday.

9b - This weekend mostly sucked.

10 - Three hours on the road, feeling demolished both ways did leave me in a beaten down state of mind to the point where all I wanted to do was listen to some heavy, angry, soul crushing tunes. Thankfully I had no shortage of that.

I give you the best of what I heard this weekend.

Thrice - Under Par
Papa Roach - She Loves Me Not
DMX - How's it Goin Down
SocialBurn - Ride
Three Days Grace - Someone Who Cares
Glassjaw - When One Eight Becomes Two Zeroes
From Autumn to Ashes - Short Stories With Tragic Endings
Taproot - Poem
Puddle of Mudd - Away from me
The Ataris - The last song I will ever write about a girl
No Use for a Name - On the outside
Primer 55 - My Girl
Cold - Stupid Girl
Strung out - Razorblade
Sick Puppies - My World
Bullet for my Valentine - The End
Smile Empty Soul - Bottom of a Bottle
Apocalyptica - I Don't Care
The Offspring - Dirty Magic
Chevelle - Comfortable Liar

Linky link.

10b - The Sick Puppies do give me an excuse to introduce you to the prettiest bass player around, the lovely miss Emma Anzai.

We Are the World, Avatar, the Olympics and Olivia Wilde

2010-02-15T16:18:00.000-06:00

1 - So I finally got around to seeing the new We Are The World remake.

It's for Haiti. That's good, fine, admirable. Their hearts are in the right place, I guess.

But this thing is awful. Horrific, disastrous, soul-crushing. Take your pick of adjectives.

Some things just need to be left alone on the basis that they're basically classic. Casablanca, Gone With the Wind, Caddyshack, Animal House, Ghost Busters (basically anything with Bill Fuckin' Murray) in film. Music is a bit different. Artists put their own spin on songs and sometimes they're good (Jeff Buckley singing Hallelujah) and sometimes they're bad (Imogen Heap singing Hallelujah) but nobody is ever really surprised when you hear a cover.

We Are the World is different. It was timeless. With an almost entirely new cast of characters, what they did was remake the song to modernize it. They grabbed today's "hottest" artists, added some fucking hiphop and the result is the abortion above.

Ugh.

Couldn't they have just brought back the old one? Given it some airplay on the radio and MTV and Fuse? Advertised that the proceeds from downloading the song on iTunes would go to Haiti? How about the artists in the remake just dig into their enormous pool of wealth and simply donate? You're telling me someone in that room didn't for a moment think, "Hey, I'll pay to not have this song created. Who's comin' with me?"

Do your part, but download and delete it. Please. No one should have to be subjected to Lil' Wayne singing what Bob Dylan once did.

2 - Avatar was better than I envisioned it would be. I had heard so many people say that the story was average, but I was impressed. Was it over the top with the message? Yup. I didn't care.

The special effects were obviously amazing. There were moments that had me ducking in my seat.

I'm usually someone who'll fall asleep if I'm watching a long movie in the theater. Gladiator and the Matrix put me asleep. Avatar had me enthralled.

I might see it again.

2b - OK, but this review is hilarious.

2c - And be sure to check out his epic review of The Phantom Menace.

3 - I thought this was an interesting, if not unfortunate, story.

I come from a family of teachers and school administrators. I hear both sides of these kinds of arguments quite a bit. But I think there's two factors in this story that place me on the side of administration:

1 - The district is one of the worst in the state.
2 - The economy

Obviously change needed to happen. The six items they wanted the teachers to agree to didn't seem too outrageous given the students' performance has been so terrible. On the surface they might be cosmetic, however. So the school day is 25 minutes longer? Fine. But what's going into those 25 minutes.

But whatever. Like I said, if the school is that bad then making some changes had to happen.

But the second item, the economy, is what makes this a little more eye opening. All of those people are losing their job because they couldn't agree on concessions. In the past year a lot of people I know have been asked to do more without the carrot of higher salary dangling in front of them. They overlying theme is, "Do what you can to be useful to your company or you're going to get canned". It surprises me that the teachers union would look at the extraordinary circumstances and come to the realization that having a job wasn't worth an extra 25 minutes a day and two weeks of in-services over the summer.

I'm going to keep an eye on this one. I think a deal is reached now that the staff realizes that, yes, administration will can their asses.

4 - Twiitter is awesome if you're a sports fan like myself. But if you were also a fan of the olympics (I'm not), I can guess that you wouldn't be incredibly pleased at the tweets you're reading today.

NBC was televising cross country skiing earlier today while the Men's Downhill was going on. They were going to show the more popular event later. However, writers on twitter were giving up to the moment updates on how the US was doing in the downhill. Sports sites like ESPN and SI were showing results on their home page. So, if you're online today it's rather difficult to not know that Bode Miller captured the bronze.

5 - I'm seeing some potential in Google Buzz. A neat (or disturbing if you want to look at it in another way) feature that your blasts are plotted on a map. So if I'm using my iPhone and I'm at a bar and I say something like, "Great happy hour deals at The Livery", my blast is going to be visible to anyone in Eau Claire using Buzz.

Since Buzz has only been out less than a week and people are still kind of feeling it out, the blasts have been few. But like I said, I can see potential. It could prove to be especially useful in an area you're not familiar with. Your friend sends a blast from the bar or club or event he's at. It shows up on your map and you automatically get directions. Pretty cool.

6 - It's possible that Olivia Wilde has successfully gotten me into four different shows.

I remember watching the ill-fated Skin when I was junior at Stout. Only around for six episodes, it was worth it for Wilde alone. Oh, and also the absurd plot in which the daughter of a pornographer gets involved with the son of DA. Shakespearean drama FTW.

Then she signed on to do 13 episodes in the second season of The OC, right around the time I started to tune-in. I was hooked.

Don't hate.

Next up was a short run on the critically acclaimed but short lived Black Donnellys. Just another of NBC's fuck-ups.

And, finally, House M.D.. I watched House briefly in college but tuned out when it became apparent that every episode would be the same. Someone is hit with a mystery illness, House is a dick, makes a mistake with the first diagnosis, patient gets worse, House is a dick, House has a revelation in the final five minutes and the person lives. Wash, rinse, repeat.

So yea, I stopped watching somewhere in the middle of season one.

Fast forward five years. I find out our lass Olivia Wilde is a member of House's cast, something that the rest of the world has apparently known for some time. So I simply skipped to the episode where she joins the cast and, like that, I'm hooked again.

I've blown through an entire season of this goddamn show in the past three days. That's not easy to do. It requires a level of inactivity and laziness that borders on (flat out is) unhealthy.

Damn you, Olivia Wilde.

7 - One of my friends is in the hospital. Another quit her old job and is no longer online. It's some holiday today so most of my other friends are home, not working. I've had absolutely no one to email and chat with all day. Conversely, outside of this blog, I've been pretty damn productive.

Summers as a kid, cartoons, vodka and Lindsey Vonn

2010-02-12T13:53:00.000-06:00

1 - It occurred to me a while back that my generation, the 24-31 year olds, may have been the last to know what it was like to spend their summers outdoors when they were kids.

When we grew up we didn't have computer games. We didn't have cell phones. We didn't have the internet.

Did we have the Nintendo or Genesis or SNES? Sure. But games were different back then. Now days the games you play are these monsters that take weeks to complete, and that's if you're ready to spend two to three hours a day with a controller in your hand. There was certainly no online multi-player and hundreds of thousands of kids around the globe playing the same game at all times of the day. No, the games we grew up on (Mario, Street Fighter, NBA Jam) could be completed in a under an hour. I loved my videogames as a kid, but even I couldn't or wouldn't sit in front of a TV playing a game for more than 45 minutes, and that was once the sun went down.

I used to love my summers as a kid. I remember taking a canoe down the river, docking it at the golf-course and playing 27 holes a day when I was 11 years old. I remember biking around Rice Lake and hitting up the old-school candy and ice cream shop or going to the pool when I was 9 and 10. Home run derbies and driveway basketball every day when was an early teen. Of course there was the little league games every summer and then Prep 13 and Junior Legion and then Legion. Eventually you get a license but that was even more a reason to get out and do things. Camping, renting wave-runners, playing frisbee golf, hitting up Snaps in Appleto....wait, nevermind.

There just wasn't a reason to stay in-doors when it was 70 degrees and sunny.

But technology has changed that. You can get hundreds of channels on cable and DirecTV. No one uses dial-up anymore so you don't have mom's bitching when their kids are tying up the phone line. High speed internet is in every household so kids can hop online and play games or check out Facebook. No kid has to get on a bike to go to a friend's place anymore if he wants to hang out; online gaming and headsets alleviate that issue. And the games these days...my god. People can start playing and not leave a room for 20 hours. It's like a completely different world to get wrapped up in.

To say I'm concerned is an understatement. I'm the oldest on both sides of my family; all my siblings and cousins are younger. I've got family in that 7-15 age range and I'm worried. Some are as sedimentary and socially awkward as any kid I've seen. They have parents who buy them computers and TVs and gaming systems and cell phones and they're as fucking wide as they are tall.

Yea, I'm worried. I talked with a co-worker this week, the one who recommended I check out the documentary that inspired my first thought in #1. He's probably 20 years older than I am but our summers were the same. You didn't spend them indoors, your mom kicked you outside and you played with your pals. Doing so you were interacting with others. Being physically active. Building a base upon which to grow as a person. You didn't understand that when you were 9 or 11 or 13, but when you look back at your childhood and realize all that you did in your free time I think you can appreciate how it helped turn you into the person you are now.

As a 28 year old without kids of my own it's easy to sit here and say that I'm going to be different. That I'm going to raise my kids the way my mom and dad raised me. Spend the nights playing baseball and having a catch and showing them how to garden and hunt and fish and swim. Keep them out of the living room and off the TV and computer. I hope I can do that. But I'm sure it won't be easy when you're competing with the rest of the world for their attention.

2 - Speaking of kids, and this is going to sound bad after the previous entry, but I did get my share of cartoons growing up. If you're my age there's a solid chance you spent your 4:00-6:00 after school watching Duck Tails, Rescue Rangers, Tail Spin and Darkwing Duck. Or when you were just starting to watch TV you caught Fraggel Rock and Care Bears. Animaniacs and Ninja Turtles when you were a little older.

Those shows were the balls.

Well, recently I heard from a married guy with kids who told me how excruciating it was to have to sit with his kid and watch some of the shit on TV now 'days aimed towards children.

Apparently it's brutal so I've come up with a solution. I'm going to get every fucking season of those shows above, the ones I grew up on, and I'll be damned if that's what my kids aren't watching one day. I figure I'll be geeking by seeing shows I loved 30 years ago while knowing they're seeing the same stuff that molded me into the nice, semi-well-adjusted guy I am today (STFU).

Come on. Duck Tales is timeless. Tell me you wouldn't stop and watch ol' Scrooge and the Boys if you happened to catch them on TV right now. Or the original Turtles. The Chipmunk Adventure or an American Tail.

When my kids are four years old they won't know that there's a Disney Channel or the Internet. Plop in a disk of Chip 'n Dale's Rescue Rangers and I'll sit and watch with them as long as they like.

:)

3 - Alright, enough of the kids and cartoons.

Let's talk vodka.

The impetus for the following was something I saw on TV. I'm a Food Network junkie. I don't watch a lot of TV, but I love me some Triple D and Throwdown with Bobby Flay. Then you have Giada and Iron Chef even Rachel Ray and there's a couple hours a week right there.

Alton Brown, however, sort of sucks.

He's the host of Good Eats, a forgettable and outdated show that FN has kept around despite sucking for years. He's also the host of Iron Chef and he mostly annoys.

But a couple weeks ago I was flipping channels and noticed an episode of Good Eats tackling a concoction near and dear to my heart: the Bloody Mary.

I love Bloody Mary's. I love the Bloody Caesar. I even love the Michelada (Mexican version where you substitute vodka for beer).

I was interested to see how this food snob could claim that the current version of the Bloody Mary was a bastardized version and so much worse than the original that came about 70 years ago.

He claimed to have the perfect recipe. I watched him make it. It looks interesting and I'll be giving it a shot in the near future. Credit Alton.

But what really got the wheels spinning was his attack on vodka. Good Eats breaks down food on a scientific level. They explain how food and drink are made and in this case I thought there was some legit application. After-all, vodka has quite the price range.

Brown described the process of making vodka. Where it comes from, how it's made, differences in the methods. He talked distilling. He even talked about the idea that with a water filter and some cheap vodka you could turn your Phillips into Goose.

In the end, though, one message was rather blunt: go cheap. Once it's distilled, it's distilled. Buy the cheap stuff and feel good about it.

But how could this be, I thought. Vodka has been my drink for a decade. Cheap shit, expensive stuff, screwdriver, white russian, bloody, bulldog, gimlet, martini...you name it, I've probably drank it. I've drank vodka mixed with shit you probably wouldn't feed someone you hate.

But never, since I've been drinking, have I been a snob about it. When I was in college I was broke so I bought the cheap stuff. When I got some money or I wanted to impress a girl I went top shelf. Sometime after college (namely when I discovered sports gambling) I decided that I could stand and appreciate straight booze so I started drinking Ketel and Stoli on rocks. And Johnny and J&B...

But one thought never crossed my mind with regards to vodka: how about a taste test?

Vodka is supposed to be a tasteless alcohol. It's distilled to remove impurities but who the hell knows what difference it makes if it's distilled once or four times? In the end it's 80 proof and it gets you drunk.

SO! After seeing Alton Brown's description of vodka I grabbed a friend, bought some small bottles and did what I should have done a decade ago: we conducted a taste-test.

Our samples (and prices for a 1.75):

Karkov - $10-$11
Fleischmann's - $10-$12
Svedka - $19-$24
Stolichnaya - $39-$46
Ketel One - $38-$47

Basically we got two rail, one medium and two top shelf bottles to test. Tasting went like this:

1 - About half a shot of chilled vodka in a glass
2 - Take the drink, give it a swish and swallow
3 - Judge taste, spit effect, need for water, impact on stomach

That's it. We did two rounds.

Round one was staggered based upon preconceived notions on what the vodka would taste like. We divided it up and went from med-low-high quality and back again.

Notes were taken, but I'm only using my observations:

Svedka - Strong. Definitely tastes like a harsh vodka. Moderate spit reflex. Not one I would start with if I were drinking rocks, though it would be possible to down a glass.

Fleischmann's - Subtle for an instant, maybe because of the cold. Then an immediate strong and unpleasant taste. I had to go for the water or something might have come back up.

Solichnaya - Not as strong as the first two. Definitely smoother. There's absolutely a bite, but barely any spit reflex. This one was a belly fire inducer. Not a strong aftertaste but there's a numbing/tingling effect on your mouth. It's close to a potent mouth wash with no taste. I could probably drink a small glass fairly easily.

Karkov - Not as bad as I thought it would be after drinking the Fleischmann's. Slight spits, but not terrible. This one seemed to have a slightly different flavor than the others. Certainly tolerable. Again, like a bitter, flavorless mouthwash. I didn't need to go for the water.

Ketel One - Very slight spits, but nothing to worry about. Not as much belly fire as the Stoli. Able to swish and hold it in the mouth for a few moments to get the taste. Again, like a tasteless, somewhat bitter mouthwash.

First round winner: Ketel One
First round loser: Fleishmann's
Time Elapsed: 25 minutes

Round 2 order was based on how terrible the first round went.

43 minutes in:

Fleischmann's - Not nearly as bad when it was quickly swilled from the mini-bottle. There were some spit I had to swallow, but it wasn't terrible. The belly fire and the aftertaste wasn't here in this shot. There also wasn't strong aftertaste. Surprising.

Svedka - Didn't the get the spit like I did with the Fleischmann's. A little, but nothing you wouldn't expect from drinking straight vodka. This one has got more bite than some of the others. That said, no water chaser needed. I could swill it. Honestly, it was similar to the first round of Stoli and Ketel.

Karkov - Again, the first thing I noticed was a different flavor than the rest. Very tasteless. Little aftertaste. Not much belly fire. I didn't get much of a sensation in my mouth after swilling and downing it. Overall, this vodka has had the least impact.

Stolichnaya - Definitely had an impact. Slight spit. Some belly fire. I absolutely got the impact on my mouth, with it immediately tingling anywhere the vodka hit when I swished it it around. It didn't taste bad, but you could certainly tell you're drinking straight booze.

Ketel One - Slight belly fire. Minimal spit. Smooth as hell. Tingling a bit. This was the last drink of the night, and not surprisingly, it was the easiest.

Overall the amount of booze drank wasn't a lot, maybe four shots over the course of two hours. But the findings of this little taste test revealed one thing:

Go cheap.

Honestly, buy the cheapest vodka you can every time you're looking for a bottle. I went in thinking I was going to be gagging with a swill of the cheap stuff I drank back in college. In reality, it's all pretty close in taste. Is that first drink important? Maybe.

But after that the only reason to go top shelf is to impress a lady-friend. Otherwise, just consider the difference in price.

Even if you think the above is total crap or you're a vodka snob, please, don't waste expensive stuff in a mixer. If you do you're an asshole.

In case you're wondering, the winner of the test was the brand I didn't expect: Karkov.

Seriously.

It's a little subtle. It doesn't have a bite in the mouth and the belly fire isn't really anything noticeable. It's really not a bad tasting vodka (I thought it was comparable to the top shelf versions) and it's a 3rd of the price.

4 - This does, though, lead into an observation I'm sure you've had if you're 25+.

Getting shitty is a bitch.

Two weeks ago we had a happy hour with some coworkers and I ordered a Johnny Walker Black on rocks. Having spent the past two months in The Cities I expected one shot in a small glass with a $9 tag. It ended up being about five shots in a mug and it ran me $3.50.

First thought is how awesome pubs in Wisconsin are. Second thought is, "OH SWEET MOTHER OF FUCK THIS NIGHT WON'T END WELL".

And it didn't. In college, that's a Thursday. You go out, stay up until god knows when, go to class the next day and do it all over again the following two nights.

But the Saturday after the JW Black experience a couple weeks ago? I was wrecked. I didn't leave my apartment or change clothes all weekend. I moved from the bed to the couch to the bed in some sick, horrific cycle. I treated bright lights and solid food like I was a damn vampire. I just wanted to sleep, pound the pain-killers and skim milk.

Last week I was went to the Cities and had a chat with a friend of mine, Nichole. And we talked about it. College. Going out. How different it is only a few short years later. It's easy to tie one on when you're 22. If you want to do the same when you're 28 you can forget that shit.

One bad night and you're ruined.

5 - A friend of mine with an iPhone alerted me to a website and an app called alice.com. It's awesome.

The concept is simple. You log on and select all the products you use at home. Cleaners, detergent, paper towels, candles, coffee, razors, shampoo, softsoap, etc. Alice keeps track of what you have and don't have and lets you know when you're running low. It also lets you know when there's coupons available on already low prices. When you want to re-stock you click a button or two, and with free shipping they send what you want to your door.

Very convenient. With the free iPhone app it's even easier. I've already made one order.

Check it out.

6 - OGTs

Yesterday I was talking with a friend about Lindsey Vonn and I said I thought she was gorgeous. 'Liza said she was cute, not gorgeous. I said Vonn gets a bump because she's a world class athlete. Athletic ability, sense of humor, knowledge of sports. Total weaknesses for me.

Take Jessica Chobot. Great looking girl, no Miranda Kerr. But she's funny, sort of outrageous and a total geek. Gives her a huge bump in hotness.

7 - Google Buzz came out this week. I've used it a couple times. I just installed it on the iPhone. Seems cool. My one concern is privacy. I don't know yet how to control who's seeing what.

I'll give a full review in a couple days.

Lady Gaga, the iPad, more Miranda Kerr and Tim Tebow

2010-02-04T18:51:00.000-06:00

1 - I vividly remember when I was 18 years old, driving home from football practice one evening, listening to a newish radio station, hearing Oleander - "Why I'm Here" and thinking to myself that I'd never get to the point where I wasn't familiar with popular music. I thought of my folks, people who probably couldn't name you five current Top 40 songs. Couldn't give you a popular current rock band. Back in 1999, I just couldn't envision myself getting to that point. I thought, "How could I not know who these musicians are? I listen to the radio, I watch MTV. I watch TV shows and movies with these artists. I go to concerts. My friends like most the tunes I like. It won't be possible".

Fast forward a decade.

I just checked the Billboard Top 100. Songs I recognize:

Orianthi - According to You
Taylor Swift - You Belong With Me
Kelly Clarkson - Already Gone
Kings of Leon - Use Somebody
Michael Buble - Haven't Met You Yet (just got sent the link five minutes ago)
Miley Cyrus - Party in the USA

That's it. Six songs. Two of which I heard only because I was sent youtube links. Not only that, but I can honestly say I've never heard of the majority of these people.

Maybe once a month I'll flip to an FM station and take a quick listen to what's new. Then I turn it off. I just don't understand how some of this shit gets played. Who the hell can listen to anything by 'Lil Wayne? I remember him as the retarded one in the Hot Boyz group ten years ago. Now he's the biggest name in hip hop? How did this freak show suddenly become the Madonna of her generation? The Jonas Bros, a band I can honestly say I've never listened to, not once, is causing some debate as to whether or not they're better than The Beatles. Seriously. Run that search in Google and you get 200,000,000 hits.

It's gotten to the point where new music by bands I liked in college amount to the only current stuff I can tolerate. Maybe twice a year some new artist slips through the cracks.

But I can't listen to this shit. I mean, my god.

1a - Something I could listen to?

How about this:

That is, somehow, Lady Gaga.

I don't get it. That's music from an artist I could dig.

2 - New technique to pass along to my fellow developers and designers. You've all gotten requests from clients that make you roll your eyes, swear to yourself, punch babies, etc. Maybe it's something that would look awful. Or it's a completely useless or superfluous component. Maybe it's just a request you don't want to do, for any reason.

If that's the case, bust out the word, "Unprofessional". No client likes hearing that what they're asking for is going to make their site look amateur.

For example. this week I got a request from a client. They wanted a Flash component I built to be modified. It would have required a couple hours of development time I didn't have. I also loved the current version of what I created and didn't want it messed with. I responded in an email. I told them they could certainly have that done. I did add this, though, "But, personally, I don't think the effect is as professional. That's just my opinion as a developer that has made [the component] both ways."

He got back to me five minutes later. "Let's stick with the original".

That's it. That's all it takes. I've used this three times and it's never failed me. Are there going to be clients who think they know better and stubbornly refuse to budge? Sure. But if you plant some seed of doubt in their heads with regards to how their site is going to be perceived, most will trust your opinion as a professional.

3 - I didn't write a post-Viking game blog. I wanted to. I had a lot to get down.

Unfortunately, I've got a large amount of friends in The Cities and I'm fairly certain that I would be excommunicated from the group in a hurry if they knew what I wanted to say.

3b - I will say this, though. That game is exactly why you watch sports. I'm a fan of neither the Vikings or the Saints. But I had an obvious rooting interest and I couldn't look away. At the end of the game my heart was racing a mile a minute. I was yelling at the TV. I was in the lowest depths of depression one minute and on top of the motherfucking world the next.

So I ask you this: what else compares? Can I get a list? I'm totally serious. I feel as if people that don't care about sports are missing out on this essential part of being alive.

3c - Example. I thought this was just one of the coolest videos I've seen in a long time.

I know just how they felt. I remember being at the final Brewer game of the regular season, the one in which they clinched a playoff birth. People were yelling, jumping up and down, hugging total strangers. It was euphoric.

4 - So the iPad came out. In the end, it's exactly what I expected.

I've got six computers, including four laptops. I've also got an iPod Touch and an iPhone. Do I need another mobile device? No, absolutely not. Will I be picking an iPad up? Ya, probably.

I went back and forth on it. It's really just a large iPod Touch.

That said, there's been times when I've been at home and wished I had a bigger version of my iPhone. When I'm in the kitchen and I'm cooking something up and I'm constantly reading directions, texting and listening to music on the same device. I think it would be rather awesome to have a dock on my counter, be able to watch a flick or listen to tunes and read recipes on a nice, big screen.

Now, can a laptop do that for me? Of course. Again, is this thing a need? Nope.

4b - But this gets me to what I think will be the selling point: the App Store.

The iPad has been a popular target since it was unveiled last week, namely from people who want to compare it to tablet PCs and Netbooks. They talk about the hardware and tech specs. No USB. No Flash. iPhone OS. No multitasking.

OK. Fair point.

But my response to those criticisms would be this: does your Netbook or tablet have the app store? The thing that makes the iPhone so remarkable? I saw Jobs demo the MLB app. Not gonna lie, I was borderline aroused.

The possibilities are sort of endless. Once developers start building iPad native apps you're going to see some amazing things.

4c - It was Mark Cuban that hit home why this thing will succeed.

4d - I had a conversation with a friend regarding these possibilities. I can see, sometime in the next decade, all print media going the way of the dodo. As someone who loves a good book to nuzzle up to, she was horrified by the notion.

But think of the money saved if publishers adopted reader devices like the Kindle or iPad as their primary means of distribution? Think of the overhead that's saved. Think of prices you could see if Publishers don't have to worry about printing. New York Times best sellers are already going for $9.99 on the Kindle. Could they go lower?

It's not just books, too. The newspaper industry is already toast. It won't be too long before they're entirely digital. But magazines, too. Digital versions of magazines, subsidized by advertisers. Want to read an article? Click an ad first.

I could see the same thing happening with digital libraries. Imagine that you could rent a novel. You pay something like $0.99 for say for a week or two weeks or a weekend. Whatever. You download this novel but before every chapter you see a short 30 second advertisement for Toyota. Or NBC's new TV series. Or fucking viagra. Who knows.

Wouldn't you prefer that to laying $30 down on the next novel by your favorite author? Or having to wait four weeks because the book you want is checked out?

The mind wanders...

5 - If you're one of my readers who does so from work, be careful. This could have been you.

6 - In another music related item, we are the world is getting remade. Not sure I know how I feel about that.

I believe the money raised is going to Haiti. That's good. What's bad is 90% of those singing this song.

I took a look at the list of people performing. I'm not seeing a Bob Dylan or Michael Jackson in there. Who the hell is Justin Bieber and what is he doing singing a classic I grew up to?

6b - What is Drago's wife doing singing in this thing? Were they that desperate to get a Russian in We Are the World?

7 - The Tim Tebow ad thing. Wow.

OK, this is sort of one where it's tough for me to take my stand without coming off like a hypocrite. Truth be told, I don't even know what my stance is anymore.

If you don't know what I'm talking about, you're either living in a cave or.... actually, that's it. You must be living in a cave. The controversy caused by this situation is amazing and I don't know how you avoid it.

But I'll give the ten cents on a dime version anyway.

Tim Tebow is the biggest name in college athletics. He won the Heisman as a sophomore. He won two national championships. He's a good looking, seemingly All-American quarterback. He's on the verge of starting his professional career, one that is largely in doubt because while he's a winner and has off the charts intangibles, he also can't throw the damn ball. I love the quote from the new GM of the Cleveland Browns, "Everything besides actually playing the position, he's got it all". That was supposed to be a compliment. I'm reminded of something about damning with faint praise....

Anyway, that's Tim Tebow the athlete. What has people going bat-shit crazy is Tim Tebow, the spokesman.

You see, Timmy is also the newly crowned prince of the (far) right-wing. He's incredibly religious. He's done work as a missionary. He's also celibate. That's all fine and good in the eyes of many (though the missionary thing bothers the fuck out of me). But it's when you go on TV during the Super Bowl and shill a Pro-Life stance to hundreds of millions of people around the globe that things, um, turn.

Tim's mom gave birth to him in a 3rd world. There were complications with the pregnancy and doctors recommended an abortion. She didn't have one. Instead she got drugged up, had the kid and twenty years later there's a Heisman trophy winner in the family.

That's essentially what the ad is going to say. It's Tim and his mom giving the story of his birth and the result. The message is this, "Look what happens when you chose life! You could one day have a superstar in the family". Fuck what the doctor says. Fuck science. Fuck circumstances. Just pop that little future Hall of Famer from your uterus. Don't worry about it. Everything will be fine.

I have a problem with his 'work' in 3rd world countries. I have a problem with his belief that I'm going to hell. That if you don't practice Christianity that you're going to burn in hell. I have problem with the notion that women don't deserve to have control of what they do with their bodies. I have a problem with his belief that homosexuality is an abomination. I have a problem with his literal interpretations of a book that is largely fiction.

I certainly have a problem with the group that's sponsoring this advertisement. Focus on the Family ponied up $2.5 million for the right to air this message. Their founder, James Dobson, is a radical, world class asshole of dangerous influence. He believes in child abuse. Animal abuse. That gays will destroy the world. He's a hateful bigot and he's wasting air, right now. And this is who the Tebows are aligning with.

Now...the hypocrite thing...

The thing is, this advertisement...I don't know if I can say it shouldn't be shown. Or that Tebow shouldn't do this if he believes in what he's saying. Or that the Tebows shouldn't use their fame and influence in this manner. Or that CBS shouldn't have taken this hateful group's money. I just don't know.

My first inclination is to say that this whole thing is a travesty and shameful. Upon further reflection, I consider the music I listen to. The shows I watch. If you've read this blog you obviously know about my love for The West Wing. Well, in the very first episode the President absolutely bitch-slaps leaders from the Religious Right. Throughout the show they portray the far Right as radical nutjobs. This was a show on NBC prime-time, and they're constantly throwing jabs at a large portion of the country. It led to the monicker, "The Left Wing".

Or what about Penn and Teller: Bullshit? I absolutely love it and the two stars. But on their show they've taken a hammer to creationism, the Bible, family values, signs from heaven, abstinence, the apocalypse and the motherfucking Vatican.

My point is that it's not as if the Left hasn't used the television medium to influence and promote their agenda, too. In the end it's simply a matter of if you don't like what you're seeing, turn the channel. I hate to say it, but that's where I'm coming down on the matter.

7b - That said, there is some awesome reading on this subject.

Jeff Pearlman took an eye-opening stance that has gotten an incredible response, from both sides. Have you ever read something from a professional and gone, "Holy shit. That's balls". This was one of those times for me. Jeff's stance largely reflected mine. But I'm not an author and I don't have Sports Illustrated helping to pay my bills.

Tim Keown of ESPN wrote more rational and politically correct presented op-ed piece. It gives you some background on Focus on the Family (fuckers).

The Slate has this one covered, too. Again, good reading.

7c - By the way, if you think I'm overestimating his influence, I think you're a little naive. You have people that don't give two shits about Football all but making him their messiah. I checked out a Facebook group, one of a shit-load. 32,000 members.

Here was a brief copy and paste of the recent wall msgs:

Zachary Aaron Moore Tim, I am a Tennessee Vols fan but I am a HUGE fan of yours! It doesn't matter what team you play for I root for you, and anyone else who has character and faith like you. God Bless you brother and keep fighting for the faith! --Don't let anyone tell you not to air your commercial! GO FOR IT! ...Psalm 37:4

Donna Hayes Bramell Thank you for letting God work through you. Thank you for letting him use you and keep up the good fight!!

Spencer Brown I live in the West and have never been a Gator fan but I have a TON of respect and admiration for Tim Tebow for his courage in standing up for the truth. Thank you Tim! The world is a better place because of you.

Cindy Deroy signed the position. if we don't stand for the innocent babies who will.

Hayden Maxey heyy tebow you are my favorite quarterback, dont listen to all the ppl that all talk about you because you are a great player and you cant measure the size of someones heart, keep God first and he will pave the way for you.

Janice Shiver Terrell Tim, praise the Lord for your testimony. Keep it up and stay strong. So thankful for your proclaiming your faith. Gator '66

Redenvelopeday Campaign Tim, what a model of character and strength you are! You have so many reasons not to promote these commercials - yet you do for the unborn! God Bless you and we are all behind you!

Toni Mihalik-Esposito Can't wait for next Sunday. Thank you for being such a good role model. I teach the "Choose Life" program in the Catholic Schools and I love to share your story with them. God Bless

Bruce Dougherty In 1985, Tim Tebow’s mother Pam was advised to abort her child. She decided against it, citing her Christian faith as a source of hope that her son, Tim, would be OK. Thank you, Mrs. Tebow, and thank God!

Shirley Harbaugh Shelite Tim--Just want to encourage you to give your pro-life message! God Bless you!

Arlen Del Pino Hill God bless Tebow & his family for standing up for what they believe in, the truth, and being a light in this world!!!

As for trying to understand or comprehend the ones against his
Superbowl ad....YET they are ok with alcohol ads, sexual innuendo ads
that affect the youth of today, cigarette smoking ads (even though it
KILL...S you),...etc....(we could go on & on)

Lets just reflect on what he Lord tells us...

Ephesians 4:18 (NIV)

They are darkened in their understanding and separated from the life of
God because of the ignorance that is in them due to the hardening of
their hearts.

Ted Fiorito Tim - I hope you always remain sober minded and focused on the gifts the Lord has blessed you with. Whether in the NFL or the plains of Africa I trust you will do your best as a Servant/Leader.

8 - I'm probably not looking too good in the eyes of my Christian pals at the moment. I totally understand. But I would like them to know I don't judge 'em. I never have. If you believe in a higher power, if you have that kind of faith, I have nothing but respect for you. I think it's admirable, always have. I've dated a lot of girls who spend their Sundays in a church. My best friends in college were practicing Christians. I don't start debates with them or think they're silly. I'm tolerant of their beliefs. I hope they're tolerant of mine. Do I believe in a woman's right to choose? Sure. Equal rights for all humans? Absolutely. Am I going to ever press those views or values on anyone? Not a chance. My views on religion and social policy are my own. I can understand the irony, this being a platform where I'm expressing my views. That's fine. But I'm not forcing anyone to read this. I'm not engaging someone on the street or even starting a conversation in my living room. I'm just writing a blog.

Like the Tebow ad, you can simply chose not to view it.

I try to talk to you, but words all come out wrong

2010-01-22T01:37:00.003-06:00

1 - I don't have many rules of life but the ones I do live by I consider important: always say "thank you" whenever you can, always over-tip, forget top-shelf booze unless it's for a martini, (real, not that fruity shit), gimlet or you're drinking it on the rocks, never leave empty ice-cube trays in the freezer, if you kill the pot of coffee make another.

Pretty basic.

But there's another that I want to share that some may not have considered: the more the more hungover you may be when you go to work, the better you had fucking look when you get there.

Unless you have to interact with others, it may be possible to make it through the morning without others realizing you tied one on the night before. But for fuck's sake man, if you smell like a mix of gin and shame then don't be wearing old jeans and t-shirt! Hell, you're probably not even safe wearing khakis and a polo.

Suit-up my friend. Remember to shave. Keep the eye-drops at arm's length at all times. It doesn't hurt to use a little aftershave. Mouth wash is an obvious necessity.

To be honest, it's probably a solid idea to keep the above items in a drawer at your desk in case of emergencies.

Don't worry about going to the coffee maker too many times if it means risking having to interact with someone. The coffee is worth the risk. But plop the headphones on at your desk and close the door or put a chair in front of your cube. Look busy, even if you're just keeping your head down while you curse the girl who made you do shots the night before. That crazy bitch.

But again, the wardrobe is the key. You gotta go GQ. It's a rule.

1b - If you think you can get away with it, a bloody mary over lunch isn't the worst idea in the world.

2 - Last week Lane Kiffin left his job as head football coach at the University of Tennessee to take over as head coach at USC. It was a good move professionally. HC at USC is one of the top positions in college sports, and might be the best in college football.

What made this an eyebrow raiser was that Kiffin had only been at Tennessee for a year and him leaving at such a crucial time left many pissed. In the South and in the SEC conference they take their football seriously. The most important thing to a lot of people is their faith, family and football, and not necessarily in that order.

So the reaction to Kiffin leaving hasn't been incredibly surprising. He's received threats, he needed a police escort out of town, they're trying to rename a sewage plant after him in Knoxville. The media is absolutely killing the guy. On Youtube there's footage of the press-room at Tennessee ten minutes before Kiffin was set to announce his resignation (something that had been leaked hours earlier). The media in the room, reporters, TV news directors, radio personalities...they all detested Kiffin and all looked really fucking mad. These are adults, here. Professionals. And here they're caught on tape calling Kiffin a snake. It's a must watch.

But, and I think this is what's important to remember here: every single one of them, you and I would have done the same thing if you were in Kiffin's position.

He's from southern California. USC was his dream job. He had already been an assistant there. They were also offering more money, obviously.

At the end of the day you have look out for #1 and your family. After all, and this is important, if you start to think there's loyalty in the real world of business – forget it. Give up that notion. If it ever makes financial sense to your employer to let you go, they'll do it in a heartbeat. If they can find someone to do your job cheaper, your gone. If they come upon a better, more qualified person, you're gone. Had Pete Carroll or Urban Meyer expressed interest in Tennessee while Kiffin was still around, he would have been fired on the spot.

So when you get an opportunity to work for a better company in a better situation, don't hesitate to make a change. Your boss, if they're reasonable, will understand. They may not be thrilled but they can understand when someone has to move on because of an offer that couldn't be turned down.

Reasonable people can take a step back and realize that what Kiffin did was the right thing. But then again, there aren't a lot of rational and reasonable people in the South when it comes to football.

Or anything, really.

3 - I haven't been doing a lot of blogging lately. For a while there I was cranking a new one out every three days or so. But since the year rolled over it's not that I haven't had things to say, it's more that I just didn't have a lot of time or energy. My workload has picked up significantly and when I get home I really don't have a lot of interest in sitting in front of a computer.

But I consider writing important. I've explained why on here before. So in the future I'm going to try and avoid hiatuses like the last three weeks. Even if the blog is only a couple paragraphs, I'm going to try and get back to writing often.

4 - Speaking of resolutions, here was mine for the New Year: spend less, save more.

The differences between my brother and I are many, but this is one where I wish I was more like him. He doesn't blow money on shit. He doesn't own a ton, but he's always going to have money in the bank. Myself? I can't keep the check card out of my pocket.

I'm a single guy with disposable income. Typically, if I like something I'm going to buy it. My kitchen is decked out to the nine's. When I cook I like to make nice meals. I love my home theatre set-up (though I could stand to have a bigger TV now). I own three computers. I think I have a pretty decent wardrobe. My golf clubs are awesome.

So yea, I have my toys. I like living well, I like the finer things in life. I like being able to golf six days a week if I want to, and last summer I basically did. And it was awesome.

But my savings account fucking hates me. Hates me.

So that's what my hope is for '10. Watch the spending. Don't go out as much. Don't buy New York strips when I'm in the mood for a great meal. Stop with the Johnny Walker Black and Bombay Sapphire. I don't watch enough TV to make DirecTV worth it and Netflix has gone unused.

I don't think I can give up the golf though. No sir.

4b - The new year hasn't started off well in this regard. Two road trips to the Cities, another to Wausau. Tomorrow night I've got center court-side seats to see the Timberwolves play Chris Paul and the Hornets.

I can't get out of my own way.

5 - Speaking of golf, another activity best done by yourself is one I would love to try again: surfing.

I love surf documentaries. If you want a good one, start with Of Wind & Waves - The Life and Times of Woody Brown. It'll inspire you. Seriously.

But I watched another one a couple nights ago and it immediately goes up there on my list of favorite films of any genre. It's called Riding Giants, and it's awesome, especially on Blu-Ray.

I don't know if it's on Netflix or at your local rental place, but it could be. It came out in 2006 and was fairly popular.

Here's a jaw-dropping clip for you:

Surfing and the ocean are the reasons why I feel like I'm wasting my life up here for six months out of the year. It's why, while I loved Stout and the people I met there, I regret not going to school on the West Coast. I wish I could go back in time and tell the 18 year old me, "Hey asshole. Would you rather walk to the bars in -20 degree temperatures or spend your evenings in the Pacific?".

5b - I think this is where my uncles failed me. Or why I missed out on having an older brother or cousin. I think I should have been sat down and told that there isn't some rule stating that I have to go to school in Wisconsin or Minnesota or Illinois.

I wouldn't expect my parents to do this, but I think someone else of their age could have clued me in.

So add that to the resolutions list. I've got a shit-ton of little cousins and this year I'm giving college advice their parents will hate.

6 - As is probably evident, I go through spells where I listen to a select group of tunes until I'm basically sick of 'em. One playlist or album can last me a while, though.

This last week it's been the [b]Monster Ballads - Ultimate Edition[/b] and I'm hear to tell ya...it's so......fucking..............awesome.

I challenge anyone listening at their desk to not bust out an air-mic when Sebastian Bach belts out "I LOOOOOOOOOVVVVVVEEEEEEE YOOOOOUUUUUU!!!!" or Kip Winger let's it rip on Miles Away.

6b - On a related note, the 80s gets a bad rap for their music. I love the hair-metal that ceased to exist once Grunge came around. You had the best real punk music. Industrial metal was created. New Wave sort of sucked but it certainly influenced a lot of great music today. Then you had the pop stars like MJ and Madonna.

If you've made it this far I'll give you credit and some tunes. I did a (very) quick browse of my iTunes collection and grabbed 17 good 80s tunes. These probably aren't my favorites, but there's variety.

http://www.mediafire.com/?jzzjjtijujl

Don't say I never gave you anything. Enjoy.

7 - OGT's

I could go in a number of directions. There are really two big ones on my mind. I might go with both or just one. I don't know it's starting to get late.

Alright, the first...

It absolutely blows my mind when I consider the difference in the sexes when it comes to judging a friend's romantic interest. It doesn't matter how they're connected, either. We could be talking someone's spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, casual hookup, someone they're seeing or even just a crush.

When a guy lets one of his boys in on who he's interested in or who he's seeing or who his girlfriend is, I'll tell you the one thought that doesn't enter their head: "What the fuck? What does he see in her?".

No. It doesn't. Why? Because we as men assume that there's something about that girl that makes our buddy happy. It's usually not even related to looks, though yea, it doesn't hurt if she's hot. No, we know there could be any number of reasons why our boy is into a girl. Just a few:

• maybe she's into sports
• or she's got a great sense of humor
• or she's got an incredible personality
• or she's just really fun to be around
• she's sweet
• she's independent
• she's ridiculous in bed
• she's funny

Who the hell knows. Maybe she's none of those things, maybe she's all of them. But we as guys understand that no matter what it is, there's something and it was important enough to make our boy fall for her.

I've had friends in the past that have dated girls that, on the outside looking in, seem to be a little off, a little wrong. It's something I might talk about with my other friends. But the conversation inevitably comes around to, "Yea, but [insert name here] is all about her so there's got to be something great about her, and you know, whatever makes him happy".

That's why, when we find out that he's interested in this girl or he's going to move in with her or he's gonna ask her to marry him, there's only one response we can reasonably give: "Hey man, that's awesome".

You know what? It's not even restricted to our boys. All of us have girls for friends and there's a good chance they've dated or married guys that makes us a little confused. But, it doesn't matter. Unless they're an abusive fuck, there's really not much reason for us to speak up. Again, we automatically assume there's something about the guy that our girls find attractive. Maybe he's stable, handsome, intelligent, thoughtful, caring or hung like a horse. We assume there's something or she wouldn't be interested.

Woman, on the other-hand, are complete opposites. If one of their girlfriends is into a guy there's a great chance they won't understand what's so great about him and won't understand what their friend could possibly see in him. It doesn't matter if they can even spot a quality or two that makes him datable. There's always a "but". "But he stocks shelves at Wal-Mart", "But he wears a gold necklace", "But he's got no hair".

It's bad enough between girlfriends. Where it's ridiculously evident, though, is when a girl has a guy as a friend. Heaven-forbid he's into someone, the opinions start flying.

"I don't like her"
"I don't know what you see in her"
"She's so not pretty"
"She's a complete headcase"
"You could easily do better"
"She'll cheat on you, you know that right?"
"She's only dating you because she's a greedy bitch"
"She's not a real blond, I just wanted to tell you"

Guys have heard it all, and it always comes from our female friends. I asked a couple friends about it recently. They'll never hear the end of it when they're into someone and their girl friends don't approve. I talked about it with my brother last night. He's been dating a girl for a while and he's got a female friend who won't shut the fuck up about how terrible she is.

You know what? Incredibly, we don't like hearing that shit. Amazing, I know.

Women don't seem to understand what guys learned long ago. There's a "but" for us too. "But she makes me happy". Fucking deal with it.

8 - OGT's (the deuce)

Alright, I'll go into the 2nd, and it'll be a helluva lot shorter. Just more of a personal observation and I don't know if it carries over with other guys.

Find me a random girl, or someone I just met that night, and flirting is a breeze. It doesn't take any effort, at all. A few questions, a little conversation, a joke or two, some chiding, some eye contact. Mix with alcohol and dancing and it's on. No sweat.

Now, if we're talking someone I know? Had conversations and have hung out with before? If it's someone I've got a legit thing for? I'm a goddamn train-wreck. Forget flirting. That shit is virtually impossible. By the time I've gotten to know her that well I've all but dismissed the possibility that she could be into me and making a move would be an awkward waste of time. Even if she's holding up a sign that says, "YES, I ACTUALLY LIKE YOU JACKASS", I'll assume a misprint. Just the idea of nutting up and making a move is such a ridiculously foreign concept that it barely deserves consideration.

In theory it's so backwards-ass that I don't even know how I got here. I just know the way it is.

So. Where does that leave a pussy like myself? I wait to get hit in the head.

At this point in my life I've got enough experiences to look back on and see the parallels. When it comes to the good girls, the really down chicks that I'm glad to have known and been apart of their lives, it started with initiative on their end and disbelief on mine. I can look back and see signs that I should have made moves long before things got started between us, and when it finally happened it was more because of something they did as opposed to something I did.

That doesn't exactly leave me with a feeling of optimism given recent events.

8b - Those who cannot learn from history are doomed to repeat it.

8c - New years resolution #3: Nut the fuck up.

9 - Alright, enough with the obligatory girl thoughts. Let's move onto subjects more near and dear to the heart of the blokes that are probably reading this: shitting, jerking off and sports.

My friends, I have your holy grail: the Deadspin weekly mailbag.

A few years ago, at Footlocker.com, my dude-bros and I would anxiously await Bill Simmons' weekly column, usually on a Friday, and if we were lucky it'd be a massive mailbag. He'd take questions about sports and pop culture and give answers. Most of them were pretty damn funny. The best part was they were usually long and a great way to waste 45 minutes of Footlocker's cash.

Guys, I'm telling you he was AAA.

I won't say much but read Deadspin's mailbags. They speak for themselves. I'll even throw you a bone with a handful of links:

http://deadspin.com/5406771/nicotine-valium-vicodin-marijuana-ectasy-and-alcohol--c+c+c+c+cocaine
http://deadspin.com/5416365/mailbag-taco-night
http://deadspin.com/5421803/the-biggest-dirtiest-poopiest-mailbag-yet
http://deadspin.com/5427253/mailbag-getting-old-blows
http://deadspin.com/5436578/the-mailbag-demands-you-name-the-brewer-baby
http://deadspin.com/5446600/go-for-the-thighs--your-open-mailbag-tuesday

Yesterday I spent a good half-hour reading about the different ways to, uh, proofread your work. After a while I was attempting to suppress so many tear inducing laughs I almost passed out. I'm dead serious.

10 - Hey, you made it. Your reward is Miranda Kerr.

I like to think I was out in front on this one. She's been the #1 goddess in my eyes for a good long while. People have been going nuts for Marrissa Miller or Adriana Lima or that other Brazilian chick for years, but I've known what's up.

Askmen.com released their Top 100 Women of 2010, and look who's #10.

But that's not why she's getting a mention here.

Guys......my god.

A New Years entry, plus a good movie with a shitty ending

2010-01-02T04:11:00.001-06:00

1 - Since late last night / early this morning, I've been meaning to put some thoughts into a New Years blog. I had some things I wanted to touch on, and I still do, but those thoughts have been hijacked by the movie I watched tonight.

An hour ago I finished the The Time Traveler's Wife, I still don't know what to think of it and that's bugging the shit out of me.

From Wiki:

Based on the premise of The Time Traveler's Wife, a Chicago librarian (Bana) has a genetic disorder that causes him to time travel randomly. Though he often disappears from her life for long periods of time, he tries to build a romantic relationship with Clare Abshire, an artist (McAdams).

Henry, the librarian, meets his future wife Clare when she is only six years old. Chronologically, however, he meets her for the first time when Clare is an adult but Henry is only twenty-eight. At that point Clare has known Henry all of her adult life.

When it was over I jumped onto Rotten Tomatoes to see what the consensus was (critics didn't like it). I read a few reviews from the big names and publications. They seemed to think the romantic leads, played by Eric Bana and Rachel McAdams, lacked chemistry and spark. They thought that the romance never really materialized for the viewer and it didn't allow people to truly care for the characters.

Whatever, that wasn't really the issue I have with TTTW. For the majority of the time I actually liked the flick. The major issue I have is how completely fucking illogical the characters act in key moments and it has to do with the idea of time travel.

After I read the reviews I googled the title and 'Logic'. I figured at least someone must have taken exception with what I thought were instances where nothing the characters did made sense.

Nope. Sure, there are reviews and blogs that poke holes into the fundamental principals of time travel in this movie, but that was mostly of the scientific variety. I'm thinking along the lines of basic human behavior.

I don't think I'm gonna give away anything Earth shattering in the following paragraphs, but...

**STOP NOW IF YOU DON'T WANT THE MOVIE SPOILED**

So you've got this girl who's known a time traveler nearly her whole life. She falls in love, and though he keeps jumping around in and out of her life, they try and make it work.

That's the dumbed down version and for the most part I liked the movie. Hell, for a while I thought I was going to be able to say TTTW was one of the best flicks I'd seen this year.

Unfortunately, the last 15 minutes completely rob the viewer (and any logical thinker) of what could have been a good film.

First, Henry finds out from his daughter (also a time traveler but one that can control where she travels to) that he's gonna die when she's five.

Then, a short while later, Henry finds out the exact time and date he dies and that it's from a gunshot wound. Not only that, but there's a strong indication that he's going to be extremely cold when he's shot.

Now, at this point, don't you think a logical move would be to prepare for this occasion? Maybe use his daughter to warn everyone of the circumstances surrounding his untimely death?

I'll simply say that Henry doesn't. When the date does come he lets his friend and wife in on what he knows and rather than saying, "Hey, there's a good chance I'm gonna get shot in the next hour, so call some paramedics so they're ready to assist". No, he just tells his wife and pal that that it's been nice knowing them.

Then he time travels and finds himself in the middle of the woods, and he's next to a massive fucking deer. Now, were I in his position and knowing that I'm going to get shot today, I think a massive fucking alarm would have gone off in my head. As soon as they showed him and the buck in the same frame my inner-deer hunter thought, "GET DOWN JACKASS!".

Nope. He just stayed there looking at the 12 pointer while a hunter put a bullet through his lung. Bleeding out he travels back to the present time where his wife and family are and he dies in his wife's arms.

The flick ends shortly thereafter.

So. Instead of taking and appreciating the enjoyable flick I'd just finished watching, I've spent the last hour and a half analyzing why the ending completely sucked.

1b- I've never minded (and by "never minded" I mean "thoroughly enjoyed") most chick flicks i've sat down to check out. Romantic comedies, tearjerkers, adaptations of chick-lit, etc…there's a good number of them I like.

I guess you could say TTTW is one of them. Barely.

1c - I'll probably read the book this was adapted from, though. Interesting story and concept and from the sound of it the movie leaves out a ton.

1d - If you're interested in catching an adapatation of chick-lit done right, check out Atonement. Now that was a good flick.

2 - Speaking of the best films of 2009, I give you mine:

5 - Halloween 2
4 - Zombieland
3 - Inglorious Basterds
2 - Star Trek
1 - 500 Days of Summer

Honorable Mention:
Drag me to Hell
The Hurt Locker
He's Just Not That Into You
The Uninvited

I loved Halloween 2. I thought it would be awful but it was the most interesting horror flick I've seen since Silent Hill or High Tension. Zombieland was just fun. Brad Pitt is the reason why I loved Inglorious Basterds. Stole every scene. Star Trek was the perfect blockbuster. 500 Days of Summer was just awesome all around.

3 - Last night was pretty fun. Saw my main dudes for the first time in a couple months and it was like we were all still living in the same town and hanging out regularly. It was like no one had ever quit Eastbay. We drank and fell into the routine of talking about friends, TV, sports, and women like it was natural.

It's easily the best thing about these guys. With other friends that have come and gone the reunions can be awkward. Not so much with my boys from Wausau.

3b - I positively love that when I described one of our mutual friends having "out-kicked his coverage" they both knew exactly what I was talking about and I didn't have to explain it to them.

3c - My only quibble was a couple girls that seemed good natured and fun at the beginning of the night turned into drunken messes of piss and vinegar once the clock rolled around to 2010.

I'm not entirely sure why. I've got a good idea, but it's not 100%. Maybe a topic for another day.

3d - The only good thing that came from us leaving the bar early at the request of our wasted female acquaintances was I didn't stay out late enough to get hammered. I woke up this morning a little wrecked but my memory was solid and I didn't have an epic hangover today.

So cheers to that.

4 - 4:00 am. Been a long day.

Happy New Years, folks. I hope you have a safe and wonderful 2010.

On a lighter note...

2009-12-31T11:20:00.002-06:00

DEA Recruits Lil Wayne To Use Up All Drugs In Mexico

After all this time I'm coming home to you

2009-12-31T02:56:00.000-06:00

I started writing a lead-in to the death of Jimmy Sullivan. I wanted to tie it into celebrities that have passed away recently. How their deaths fascinate and captivate us. How you hear the news and for the rest of your life you remember where you were when you heard.

It sucked. It didn't sound or read right. It was totally superficial and disingenuous.

I'll just say that I really fucking loved Jimmy Sullivan on the drums. I've been legitimately saddened since I heard he passed away. Afterlife has been going through my head almost non-stop.

There aren't a lot of musicians that can have this effect on me. Two of them were in Avenged Sevenfold and one of them is no longer with us.

I still remember the first time I saw Ax7 live.

It was years ago at Warped. Everyone else was playing 2:00 minute, typical punk tunes. Avenged Sevenfold comes onto a small side-stage and their entire set-list was four songs. It lasted thirty minutes.

They played the best show of the day. Synyster Gates and The Rev blew me away. Zachy and Shadows were incredible.

I think I've seen almost 80 bands in the last ten years and Avenged Sevenfold has consistently put on the best show, never disappointing in any of the three times I've seen 'em. They went from side-stage to main stage to headlining their own tour. But it's not going to be the same without Jimmy.

RIP Rev.

I've got a sickness, it feels like love

2009-12-28T00:58:00.000-06:00

1 - Like millions of others out there, I'm wondering whatever happened to the idea of a holiday break.

The days went by too quickly, not a lot was accomplished, not a lot of time was spent doing something I enjoyed, too much time was spent on the road, I endured too many screaming little kids and dogs that made my eyes ache, the weather was total and complete bullshit, etc.

The problem is without a wife and kids of my own, I'm generally without an excuse when I'm asked to travel to see family. It's not that I don't want to see my folks and do the traditional Christmas thing, but one night to me is perfect. Five nights of not sleeping in your own bed, however, is excessive and dangerous.

2 - Packers in the playoffs!

I really wanted it this season, certainly more-so than others. To not make it with 10 wins in a season where Rodgers has done so well, Woodson has been a defensive MVP and Matthews emerged as a super-stud would have been a real let-down.

It looks like we'll see the Cardinals in the playoffs, and I'm totally good with that. Nothing about them scares me. I know they can look really good at times, but they're also prone to putting up a lousy showing.

The Wild Card weekend can't get here quick enough.

3 - Last night was a shit-show and probably the highlight of the break. Ben, Bobby, my aunt, uncle and I went out to celebrate my little sister's 21st. Not gonna lie, she impressed me. That little girl was downing shots and Malibu like it was her job. She almost made it the entire night, too. Then we got home and her big brother had to hold her hair while she yacked into a toilet.

4 - I've been looking at a lot of "Best of the Decade" lists. Movies, athletes, games, etc. Last week I was asked to come up with my top ten favorite albums of the decade.

It's not going to be easy. I started looking tonight but I won't be able to come up with a list until tomorrow.

So far my only locks are Saturate, Breakaway, and God Loves Ugly.

4b - Shut the fuck up on Kelly Clarkson. Breakaway was a pop masterpiece.

:)

4c - God Loves Ugly will be #1 on the list.

It's probably only 2nd to More Betterness! on my list of favorite albums of all-time.

5 - Another one bites the dust.

One of the few competent senior staff members left at SP has decided to take a job in the cities, he told me tonight. The announcement goes out tomorrow.

My hope is this is the straw that breaks the camel's back and management realizes that serious changes need to be made in their business model.

Realistically, I doubt anything comes about and SP will fall further into obscurity.

5b - I'm happy for Chris; I know this is what he's wanted for a while. But he's a good dude and a golfing buddy and one less awesome person I'll know here in town.

5c - I need out.

6 - I LOVE Penn & Teller: Bullshit!

The Tudors and The Wire and Weeds and Californication get the pub, but this is the reason to get premium channels (unless, you know, you can get the show without the need to have Cable or DirectTV...just sayin').

If you haven't seen the show, you're missing out. The two Las Vegas magicians pick a topic and call, well, bullshit on it. I'll let Wikipedia take it from here:

Many episodes aim to debunk pseudoscientific ideas, supernatural beliefs, popular fads and misconceptions, and often from a libertarian point of view, the political philosophy espoused by both Penn and Teller. The show criticizes proponents of what they perceive as nonsense and dishonesty — bullshit — often citing ulterior political or financial motives. The stated aim of the show is to apply critical thinking to misconceptions.

Hilarity ensues.

Some of the episodes are a little touching, many are startling, all are great for a good chuckle.

Seriously, get it to the top of your Netflix que.

7 - New Years plans fell through. It's never been one of my really big holidays but I was looking forward to Chicago until I decided I simply couldn't take Thursday off. Now I'm open to other ideas. The Cities? Wausau? A good time in EC?

Let me know if you've got anything.

A Happy Holidays Entry

2009-12-25T03:43:00.000-06:00

1 - Happy Holidays, everyone.

2 - My little sister dominates Christmas every year. She comes up with thoughtful gifts for everyone and when it's time to handout the presents for the family she does an awesome job. No one is more excited to don a Santa hat and pass out gifts than my little sis.

She easily stole the show tonight, too. She made my brother a blanket and she gave me a picture to hang with four pics of the family cats, Boo and Misfit. I love it. I couldn't ask for a better gift.

3 - Speaking of Boo, he ate well tonight.

I had to give him to my folks when I moved, but I'm proud to say I raised him well. When I got him he was only a couple weeks old and the size of a fist. By the time I had to give him over to the parents he was the most social cat you've ever seen in your entire life.

He's like a friendly little dog if dogs didn't typically suck. He loves attention from anyone and everyone. He'll follow you around wherever you go. His favorite room in the house in the kitchen. Hell, he'll fetch.

Before he was even six months old I could let him outside my apartment while I grilled and he wouldn't run away. He'd walk around the courtyard and look in windows and doors while the rest of the cats that others' owned sat there and watched from behind the glass. I'd bring him outside while I read on a picnic table and he'd just stroll around or chill.

One of my neighbors told me once that I was the envy of the complex because of the little guy.

He's now three and playful and awesome as ever. Tonight at the table we had six seats made up at the dinner table. Myself, my folks and my two siblings and one for Boo. He sat there while the rest of us ate. Every once in a while I'd cut up some lobster or steak for the little guy and he'd wolf it down. Then he'd paw at me until I'd give him some more.

He got a good amount of lobster; I'm not really a seafood guy anyway.

4 - Tonight at the dinner table, though, I did feel a good amount of sadness.

Steak and lobster. That's the usual holiday or birthday meal in the King household. There's typically a good amount of scraps left over for the pets and tonight, when I was finishing up, I started putting together what would be left for our dog Bo. Only I quickly realized that Bo wasn't with us anymore.

This was the first Christmas in 15 years that Bo wouldn't be helping out with the leftovers and it hit me like a truck. I'd write more about my feelings on that tonight but nothing seems worthy of his memory.

#5 My Top 10 Christmas Flicks:

10 - Gremlins
Uhh, one of the first movies I remember watching and I love it and all...but...it's a horror flick.

9 - Bad Santa
The fact that there's a holiday movie where the best line is, "You ain't gonna shit right for a week" is a testament to how shallow this list is.

8 - National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation
"Play ball!"

7 - Love, Actually
There's a damn porn scene in this one. Great flick, but I won't be showing it to the kids one day.

6 - Die Hard
Probably the second best flick on the list, but as a Christmas movie this is as high as I can put it. Yippee-k....

5 - George C. Scott's A Christmas Carol
It only took five movies to get to the first serious holiday flick...

4 - Home Alone
...and then it's fucked up by that kid who yells and sets traps for robbers.

Great flick, though.

My dad has only taken my brother and I to two flicks in our lifetimes. This was one of 'em. The other was Rambo III.

3 - Mickey's Christmas Carol
God damn I loved this 25 minute masterpiece.

2- A Charlie Brown Christmas
Words won't describe the greatness when Chuck and the gang hang around outside the tiny little tree at then end. Hell, even I start singing.

1 - It's a Wonderful Life
I could recite this flick but I still well-up when Mr. Gower realizes George saved lives in the drugstore.

I chuckle when they dance over the pool.

My heart sinks when they vote to save the savings and loan but only if George sticks around.

"I'll love you 'til the day I die."

Donna Reed beaming when the town comes to help George at the end of the flick and his brother toasting to his wonderful life.

The perfect flick.

Clay Matthews III makes me giggle like a little girl

2009-12-22T00:56:00.000-06:00

I wasn't a fan when the Packers moved up to get an overachieving DE/LB with average stats and great bloodlines last April. I would have gone elsewhere. I thought Matthews would be great on special teams and average (AJ Hawk-like) on defense.

I'm glad to be wrong. The guy is the 2nd most untouchable player on the Packers and front-runner for Defensive Rookie of the Year. His motor is other-worldly. He's got stupid closing speed. He's strong as fuck.

Do I have a serious man-crush? Yes. Yes I do.

Alright, I'm glad I got that out of the way.

We now bring you back to your regularly scheduled heterosexual activities.

(almost) 10 Things

2009-12-21T02:03:00.000-06:00

1 - Have you ever gotten so drunk that you can't decipher between a memory and a dream? Yea, I know how bad that sounds.

On the drive home from the Cities this morning I thought I remembered something that happened at the bar last night and I thought to myself how awesome it was. But the more I thought about it the less likely it seemed to have occurred. It just seemed so out of place regardless of how drunk everyone was. So now I'm sitting here and I'm wondering if I just dreamt it.

I have no idea.

2 - Easiest sign that I've watched too much TV over the last year: I ate raw beef tenderloin last night.

I had no idea what I was ordering at the restaurant we ate dinner at. But I remember seeing an episode of Top Chef where a contestant won with something called a beef carpaccio. I didn't remember exactly what it was but I don't get the opportunity to try something new every day so I gave it a shot.

What arrived on my plate was an incredibly thin slice of meat, and it was raw. On top of the meet was a mixture of olive-oil, salt, pepper, goat cheese, spinach and arugula. I tried it, and I shouldn't have had another bite. It was like liquified meat and truly disgusting.

That was my dinner.

2b - I told Liza that I was gonna need to do a shot of straight vodka to kill the taste from my mouth. Once we were back to the hotel I did just that.

2c - It occurred to me that something so nasty could be an easy way to drop weight. Come dinner time take a couple bites of beef carpaccio. You won't want to eat anything for the rest of the night.

Appetite destroyed.

3 - Two highlights from last night. One being the thing I think I remember but I'm not 100% sure really happened.

The other was waking up in the middle of the night because some random dude that came home with all of us was snoring like a chainsaw. He was keeping everyone awake. I grabbed my pillow and proceeded to beat the holy hell out of him with it.

The guy didn't even react. He was so stoned-drunk he just kept snoring away. So I grabbed a blanket and pillow and passed out in the bathtub. Left the snoring guy to irritate the rest of the room.

4 - Tough loss tonight. I didn't expect the Packers to win, not for a single moment in the game. Even after they scored the go-ahead TD my first thought was, "Dammit, he should have gone down at the one yard line, there's too much time left".

Sure enough, those two minutes were just enough time for Roethlisberger to go the length of the field, aided by terrible coaching and crummy penalties by the Packers.

4b - Games like this, though, are why I love sports. It's why anyone loves sports. That last minute of football seemed like a motherfucking lifetime for Packer fans. Every second was an eternity. Fans were watching with their hearts in the pits of their stomachs.

Find me something else that brings out this kind of emotion on a regular basis.

5 - Speaking of emotion, 'scared-shitless' is an emotion right?

It's a terrible feeling when you're driving in high-speed four-lane traffic and you can't see out of your windshield. Such was the case this morning on my way out of Minnesota and the Cities. We got a fair amount of snow last night and the city had been out salting the roads. Unbeknownst to me, my windshield wiper fluid was 99% gone. After two minutes on Interstate 94, I knew.

My windshield was absolutely caked. Using the wipers made it worse. I was spitting on my hand and trying to wipe off spots on the windshield so I could see while driving . I wanted to take an exit and get to a gas station but I couldn't read the signs above the roads. I could barely make out the cars in front of me.

I ended up making it to Hudson alight, obviously. But those twenty minutes were hell.

6 - iTunes has a list of your top 25 most played songs. If you don't try and manipulate the playcounts it's usually a good representation of the music you dig.

Mine, with the playcount in parentheses:

1 - Thrice - Come all you weary (135)
2 - Socialburn - Pretend (119)
3 - Something Corporate - Down (118)
4 - The Veronicas - Untouched (116)
5 - Paramore - Pressure (111)
6 - Taylor Swift - Should've said no (110)
7 - Thrice - The Whaler - (110)
8 - The Veronicas - I can't stay away - (108)
9 - Jojo - Let it rain (99)
10 - Fuel - Halos of the sun - (97)
11- Three Days Grace - Pain - (92)
12 - Damone - Overchay with me - (89)
13 - Dustin Kensrue - Please come home - (89)
14 - Paramore - Decoy - (88)
15 - Ne-yo - Because of you - (87)
16 - Paramore - Stop this song - (87)
17 - Avant - Lie about us - (86)
18 - Senses Fail - Can't be saved - (85)
19 - Thrice - red sky (84)
20 - The Veronicas - Leave me alone (81)
21 - Midtown - Your love (80)
22 - Augustana - Stars and boulevards (78)
23 - Socialburn - Utopia (78)
24 - The Wreckers - Tennessee (77)
25 - Ben Jelen - Come on (76)

Some notes...

• Other than Come All You Weary, Red Sky and Pain I don't think any of the other songs would rank in the best songs I've heard in the last three years.

• Should've Said No was the first Taylor Swift song I'd heard, which is probably why it's so high. Overall I think it's maybe her fifth or sixth best song.

• True to form, a strong showing by women on the the list. 10 songs featuring female leads.

• Lie About Us was one of my favorite tunes for a three month stretch a year ago and I nearly wore my headphones out listening to it. Then I just stopped liking it for one reason or another and I don't think I've listened to it five times in the last year.

• Jojo? Really? I love that tune but 99 times? I hope I was playing the song, hit repeat and put down the headphones for two hours.

• Good bets to make the top 25 in the next year:

1 - Orianthi - Bad News
2 - Kings of Leon - Sex on Fire
3 - Lupe Fiasco - Hip Hop Saved My Life
4 - Plumb - Damaged
5 - Rise Against - Savior

7 - This blog is the reason my movie and TV watching is behind. I've got DVD rips of The Box, Avatar, Surrogates, Paranormal Activity and seasons of Dexter, HIMYM and Californication on my hard drive. But anything requiring attention is put on the back-burner when I'm writing.

So instead of catching up on shows my pals tell me are amazing, I watch repeats of The West Wing or movies I've already seen. Inglourious Basterds has been a solid choice lately.

7b - Brad Pitt is the most underrated actor in Hollywood.

I know it's reasonable to say that someone like David Strathairn or Paul Giamatti or William Fichtner could get the vote, but can you give me one of their truly memorable roles? Can you think of a role where they truly stole every scene they were in or you bothered to watch a movie numerous times simply because of the role they played?

I give you:

- Interview With a Vampire (vampire)
- Se7en (who doesn't have that final scene ingrained in their heads? who else can you see pulling that off?)
- 12 Monkeys (insane eco-terrorist)
- Meet Joe Black (either his worst performance or one of his best...I don't know. But the guy played Death
- Fight Club (Tyler-f'ing-Durden)
- Snatch (easily my favorite acting performance ever. I'll be watching this flick forever and the major reason is Pitt)
- Snatch (I'm listing it twice. It was that awesome. I feel like I should be watching it right now)
- The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (probably his best performance ever but I hated the flick)
- Inglourious Basterds (steals every scene. It's amazing)

I loved him in Ocean's 11, Troy, Benjamin Button and Mr. and Mrs. Smith.

I know people will always rag on the guy for getting by on his looks, but he's so goddamn good as an actor and will never get the credit he deserves.

7c - Watching Inglourious Basterds right now. Definitely one of the more entertaining movies I've seen this year.

8 - Cutting it short at eight things. G'night folks.

It's 3:00 am and I don't have a witty or clever title. Goodnight folks.

2009-12-15T03:00:00.000-06:00

Just something quick regarding what I read tonight...

1 - I love Mark Cuban.

I used to despise the guy when all I knew him as was a boorish NBA owner who ran onto the court to piss and moan and bitch at the refs. Then I realized he was like any other person who struck it rich and decided that instead of reading about the moves his favorite team made he'd make them himself.

Now he's one of the world's richest fans and he's doing what every guy who enjoys sports would love to do for a living: he runs a professional sports team, talks trash with opposing players, hams it up with fans and does it while sitting court-side in jeans.

I think that's basically awesome.

But he's also pretty fucking brilliant. You don't pioneer video on the web and sell it for a shit-ton without having having some ammunition above the neck.

He's got himself a blog (and a FB account and a Twitter feed in case you're wondering). Some of it is above my pay-grade but I follow along and I read with interest when he writes something new.

An entry from a few days ago caught my attention.

He wrote about motivation, a topic I've recently covered.

I loved it. But it was a quote at the end that made me stop and think:

"Success is about making your life a special version of unique that fits who you are."

I like that. I like that a lot.

2 - It got me thinking about my favorite quotes. Four have always stood out, you can find each in my Facebook info. I'm assuming if you're reading this you're also a FB pal so check 'em out if you like. Three of them start...

"Every morning in Africa..."
"I'm growing very weary..."
"The things you learn in maturity..."

I got them from my dad's office. For as long as I can remember, they've been framed on his walls or sitting at his desk, no matter what job he's held. I remember, vividly, being a young elementary school kid in Rice Lake and walking to his office after classes were finished. When I got there I'd sit while he worked and look at everything in his office. I used to love the copy machine a few doors down. I'd bring pictures and booklets from Nintendo games and he'd make blown up copies for my walls at home.

But what stood out most were the three quotes from above. I had them memorized by the time I was seven years old. Even if I hadn't committed them to memory they followed him from office to office as we moved. Schools changed, artwork changed, pictures changed, awards changed. Those three framed quotes didn't. Just simple black type on white paper in cheap frames. They always made their way to prominent places in the old man's office.

I like to think of myself as a traditionalist, so that's what I brought with me to my job in EC, the town I was born in. Those same three quotes, the same kind of black frame prominently displayed around my desk.

3 - The last quote is one I picked up on my own. Over ten years ago Bret Easton Ellis published Glamorama. It wasn't his most commercially successful by any means and it was absolutely slammed by reviewers. I picked it up because I had previously read American Psycho and The Rules of Attraction and they both made me fall in love with writing. The things that Ellis did were so unlike anything I'd ever seen. He made me wonder what could be done if conventions were challenged and laws of prose were broken.

Unfortunately, Glamorama sort of sucked. The writing was interesting, the plot wasn't.

But for whatever reason, one quote stood out:

"you show the world things and in showing the world you teach it what you want"

I actually remember where I was when I read it. I remember putting the book down and thinking about what Ellis had written. What he meant, why he might have buried it in a absurd chapter in a shitty novel.

But the quote stuck out to me. I thought about it a lot and it made sense. Everything you do in life is some sort of reflection of what you want everyone to know about you and how you want them to perceive the world around them. Whether you do it consciously or not, you're influencing others.

I don't know. I just thought it was cool concept.

3b - Before I wrote this I re-read the chapter in Glamorama that the quote comes from. If you want to experience a literary roller coaster just check out chapter 34 and try to keep up.

Sanity's just another dream away

2009-12-10T02:40:00.000-06:00

Alright, a quick hitter.

1- Well today was Exhibit A on why living in Wisconsin blows four months of the year.

Three weeks ago I was golfing.

This morning I got stuck in an intersection outside my place because I was going slightly up hill in eight inches of unplowed snow. My little Toyota didn't stand a chance. I had to put the car in reverse, find the first driveway I could roll up, put the car in drive and slingshot my way through what I hoped would be an open intersection.

A block later I skidded my way halfway into a major intersection and was nearly killed by a jeep going 45 mph.

Then I broke two traffic laws when I went through a red light and made an illegal turn because at the moment no one was coming and I had enough momentum to move.

So then I finally get to work and notice a distinct lack of vehicles in the parking lot. I tried to slow down and make the turn (I was again driving on an unplowed road) and I couldn't. No way could I have gone in reverse so I just kept on driving and hoped to do better the second time around.

When I finally made it in, there were five of the 25 SP employees around. Apparently some of us got calls that there wasn't any school today. A simple email to the staff wouldn't have sufficed?

Meh. Whatever.

Like I said, the weather in this state blows.

2 - You reap what you sow. As much as I hate referring to anything biblical, I think it holds true. Treat people with kindness and respect and good things will come about. Treat people carelessly and it's going to come back to bite you in the ass.

When it does, don't expect a motherfucking pity-party from me.

3 - Monday night made me a believer in the Packers D. Clay Matthews Jr is a freaking stud. Raji had his best game as a pro. Brad Jones looked like a potential impact player. Three stud starters in the front seven from one draft alone? Possible.

4 - I'd love for someone to give me a reason why people can't be open and honest in a relationship. Whether it's 17 years of marriage, four months of dating or someone you've only been seeing casually, recent evidence suggests that people would rather be shut-off or lie than just say what's on their minds.

It wasn't a good weekend for a few of the King boys in this regard.

5 - I should be in danger of getting burned out on Orianthi, but I don't see that happening any time soon.

Suffocated is probably the best song I've heard this year.

I love it. Lyrics, riffs, vocals. Yea it's straight forward but what it does it does well.

Second favorite tune on the album is Drive Away. It's got some blues guitar going on and it's a mellow change up from some of her other good tunes.

Here's an acoustic version I'm digging:

There are two or three songs I'm not in love with, but top to bottom this is the best thing I've heard all year. If you pick it up and want to go straight to the goods, here's how I'm ranking the songs.

1 - Suffocated

2 - Drive Away
3 - Bad News
4 - According to You

5 - Feels like Home
6 - Think like a Man

7 - Highly Strung

8 - God Only Knows
9 - Untogether
10 - Believe

11 - What's it gonna be

The top four are basically awesome, with Suffocated a strong candidate to make my all-time list. Five, six and seven are definitely solid. Highly Strung is a good instrumental. After that the album falls off a cliff but only What's it Gonna Be is unlistenable.

6 - Am I the only person who didn't find Arrested Development to be remotely entertaining?

I ask because I recently read a list of the top 20 shows of the decade and I hated the top two, The Wire and AD. The Wire is coma inducing and Arrested Development was the equivalent of watching three retarded chimps picking feces out of each other's hair.

But if you say you didn't enjoy AD it's like you insulted someone's mother. I've never seen a group get so defensive as I have when said I didn't think it was a funny show.

7 - Another reason my stay in Wausau was dope: my power bill in the winter. I lived in an upper, a nice one, when I was over there. I didn't turn the heat on once that winter. My power bill was around $24 every month. They actually credited me because I used such little electricity.

Over here my bill is five times as much. What the fuck is going on?

8 - Last weekend was absolutely awful. Maybe one of the worst I'd had in years. On Sunday I was looking forward to getting back to work.

This weekend is gonna be different. No traveling, no hosting guests. Doing nothing will never seem so relaxing.

9 - Your word of the day is 'somnambulant'. My text editor doesn't like it but Merriam's does. So does Strung Out when they wrote a song I love.

10 - 2:40 in the morning. G'night folks.

Yes, No, Maybe So

2009-12-08T23:41:00.000-06:00

Ladies and gentlemen, we have a guest blogger tonight. She's a delightful tart, so read her observations on life and relationships here.

Without further ado...

I’ve decided that, in dating, there is no other response more irritating than “maybe” when it comes to making plans. What does maybe mean? You deign to spend time with me if nothing better comes along? Are you playing a game? “Yes” I get. It means, “I would love to hang out with you, thanks for asking.” Although “no” can be a little muggy, is still decipherable. If you legitimately have plans, it just means “no.” If you have no plans, it simply means “I don’t want to see you.” Either way it is much clearer than “maybe.”

If you give me a “maybe” because you potentially have plans but nothing has solidified, I can grasp that. However, if your “maybe” is vaguely dependent on your mood that day, then forget it. I don’t need to be waiting on you to make a decision about my plans. If you don’t think I’m worth hanging out with when you have absolutely nothing better to do, then I’m sorry, but you aren’t worth my time when you do decide to make plans with me.

Being “maybed” puts you in such an uncomfortable position. Do you bring the subject up again? Do you even bother contacting the person in the meantime? I hate how much control I lose with a “maybe” answer.

Just yesterday, for the first time I asked a guy I’m seeing if he would like to do something this weekend. In the entire time we’ve been dating, I have never once initiated a phone call or a date. I didn’t want to put myself in the position where he could turn me down. But, I’ve started to like him and I have been thinking maybe I should be making more of an effort. So I floated an idea by him thinking there is no way he is going to say “no” if he isn’t busy. He has pursued me steadily for months now, so why in the world would he decline?

However, the answer I got was much worse than a flat-out “no.” He said “maybe.” My mind has been trying to grasp just what that means for the past couple days. In regard to the questions I posed earlier I decided that, no, I would not be bringing the subject up again. And, no, I will not be initiating contact with him in the interim. I actually made plans for the “maybe” day. Not really sure where this is going to land me but I know that I am fairly interested to see how this is going to pan out. Both for myself and for him.

Better late than never

2009-12-04T15:58:00.000-06:00

When I was about five or six years old my uncles gave me a CD. Heart's Bad Animals was one of the first albums I owned and I loved it. Shortly thereafter I watched a music video for Alone and immediately knew, "Yup, I'm into girls. Girls are what's for me".

It was Nancy Wilson. I considered her the sexiest thing alive before I even knew what that meant and ever since I've had an affinity for chick rock. The Go-Gos, Belinda Carlisle, Bonnie Raitt, Tsunami Bomb, Avril, Michelle Branch, Jessica Harp, Kelly Clarkson, Evanescence. You name it...

Twenty-plus years later we finally have someone to take the mantle away from Nancy, though.

Orianthi fucking rocks. I've been listening to her album Believe all afternoon and, to put it simply, I'm blown away. She can sing her ass off, she's shreds on guitar and, yea, she's hot.

Best of all, though, her tunes are actually good.

I was digging her first track "According to you" fairly quickly. It's her first single. Youtube it. Then I heard "Suffocated" and my eyebrows raised. By "Bad News" I was hooked and the album just stayed consistently solid throughout.

Guitar fans, give "Highly Strung" a listen. It'll rocks your balls off.

Somebody's Going to Emergency, Somebody's Going to Jail

2009-12-04T01:32:00.000-06:00

1 - Tonight I did one of the more heartbreaking things I've ever had to do. I was sent a letter entirely about the dissolution of a close family member's marriage. It happened very recently, very suddenly. One minute he thought he was in a happy relationship of almost twenty years. 15 seconds later it all ended and his life was ruined.

The letter was an account of how it all came about and the effect it's had on all parties, including the two young kids.

The letter needed to be edited. Grammatically correct. Language cleaned up. Not gonna lie, some of the emotion had to be dulled. It's going to be seen by someone who's used to seeing documents of a kind of standard.

Part of me wishes I wouldn't have touched it. Does the letter have a greater impact with punctuation marks, misplaced modifiers, colloquial phrases and shifts in tense? Maybe it sounds like it's coming from a husband who's weeks removed from losing what he loved the most.

Maybe that's how the letter should have read.

I don't know.

1b - Is it a bad sign that when I got the news of what happened I wasn't surprised? I didn't have any significant feelings of hatred or outrage? I still don't, even after finding out all the specifics of the situation. I feel terrible for the kids and for the man who's life has been ruined, but anger and hatred and shock and disgust aren't in the range of emotions that I've experienced.

It's not that I expect to ever hear about situations like these, it's just that when it does happen it doesn't seem to matter who it happens to, I don't react like I've been blind-sided or the air has suddenly left the room.

The question that I'm sure has plagued other members of my family, "How could she ever do this" has never entered my mind. It's just the way things are, I suppose.

1c - Maybe that leads me into my next topic: Tiger Woods.

Again, not a single thing about this story has made me bat an eye. To recap, Tiger Woods, the world's most famous and wealthy athlete, has allegedly been having an affair with a woman for the past couple years. Three other women have come out and said they have been with him too.

TMZ, the Post, Deadspin, the Sun-Times, ESPN, SI....they've been all over this shit for a week. You can't go to any news site or big time blog and not get hammered with the sordid details of Tiger's supposedly private (HA!) life.

My questions are thus:

1 - How can anyone possibly be surprised that a young, wealthy, insanely famous, successful person that spends the majority of their life on the road could be unfaithful?

2 - Why does Woods owe anyone other-than his family an apology?

3 - Why should you care?

Tiger fucked up. No doubt. But Jordan screwed around. So did Brett Favre. So did Kobe. So did a motherfucking President of the United States. So have countless other public figures that we love to hold to a higher standard.

In the case of Woods, he never professed to being man of the year. He's out there hocking Nike products, Gillette razors and Buicks. When he wasn't he was kicking ass on the gold course. Outside of that...what did anyone really know of him? The guy likes his Privacy (caps for a reason; that's what Tiger named his yacht).

Nobody is perfect. People fuck up. You feel bad for those they hurt but try not to crucify someone for acting on human impulse or because they had a moment of weakness. Everyone has fucked up in some way or another. The most you can hope for is they learn from their mistakes.

1d - Violent crime is the exception. Sorry, lock 'em up.

Writing doesn't suck.

2009-12-03T01:41:00.000-06:00

So it's been about a week since the last entry and while I've had things to write about, I run hot and cold. One minute I'm amped about something and the words can't wait to come out. Five minutes later I'm off the ledge and it just doesn't seem worth it.

Last weekend I twice went out with friends. On Saturday night on the way home I was in a shitty mood and wanted to get it out on here. I got home, turned on a replay of the ball game, checked FB and lost interest.

It bugs me because I know that what I didn't write is probably now gone.

Yesterday I needed find an old file on my machine I use for work. Searching through my docs (I'm a digital pack-rat. I saved everything I typed in college. I've got shit from high school and IMs from when ICQ was new. I still have the first mp3 I ever downloaded – Sneaker Pimps - 6Underground, well over a decade ago).

But I came upon blogs and entries from my time in Wausau. Until yesterday I hadn't looked at what I'd written in over two years and I got a serious kick out of it. It wasn't like a lot of it was anything special. Just day to day observations, interactions with people, my times with friends, romantic interests and thoughts on current events.

Nothing earth shattering.

But it was all stuff that had faded with time. Although only two years removed, some of the things that made me grateful for meeting the people I did over in Wausau were tough to recall. But reading the words I'd written back then brought it all back.

• I could remember Dave's hilarious philosophy on infidelity.

• How thankful I was to own a cat when I had to take Frank's dog for a walk the week he was out of town.

• Louie letting me in on the scandalous and sordid happenings going on in Internet Marketing and then dying of laughter once I was back at my desk.

• The embarrassment when Shannon told me how she almost ran me over when she saw me jogging home shirtless from Burk's extremely early one morning (I still totally miss that Ataris's tee).

• Haaaaavvvvvve you met Brian?"

• The exact way I felt when I knocked on Jess's door, how nervous I was and being floored with the way she looked when she opened it.

The point is this: a picture isn't worth a thousand words. At least not with the way I write.

You can take a million photos and they're good to bring you a smile, but I can guarantee they won't do your experiences justice. If you want to relive the times in your life you want to remember, write. Even if they seem like insignificant observations at the time, put them in a text document and save 'em. Months and years later you'll read through them and they'll unlock memories you'd long forgotten. You'll laugh, cry, get pissed but most importantly you'll remember.

What motivates you?

2009-11-25T02:03:00.000-06:00

1 - So about a month ago I got word that my job status would change in some way, though management didn't know exactly how. They had just laid three people off and while they wanted to keep me around, my price tag left me vulnerable. Early word was that I'd go from salary to hourly and possibly work from home.

I'm not stupid. I've known since I started that, despite having unique ability within my company and in the area, I was always going to be in danger if times got bad.

So when word came down I wasn't totally blindsided and to be honest wasn't even that worried. Finding a new job wouldn't take long and I was more than willing to relocate. I like Eau Claire a lot but all my friends are either an hour west or an hour and a half east. Everyone I know here is either married or may as well be. Being the only single dude in your group sort of sucks.

So anyway, that was a month ago. Since then I've actually never been busier or had more things to accomplish at SP. I've remained on a full time basis and Sales just sold a Flex app that's going to take a minimum of 50 hours to complete.

I'm content.

2 - I'm having some difficulty coming up with a worse purchase than jewelry. It sort of hit me last night when I caught a Kay Jewelers commercial. You had your typical beautiful couple and the guy caught his wife or girlfriend by surprise with this massive rock. She of course teared up as if she couldn't be happier. Then the pricetag shows up and it hits me: could there possibly be a more irresponsible buy? Not even now in this economic climate, but ever?

If I'm dropping a grand on something it had better come in 1080p or go towards paying off a mortgage or car payment. Because when you sit back and think about it, what the hell do diamond earrings do for you? Is it really that big a thing with women that they can show off their jewelry to their girlfriends?

I know if won't happen, but my hope is that the girl I settle down with is the type that if I ever splurged and brought home something like that she'd kick me out for blowing a tuition payment for junior.

3 - What motivates you? The subject has been on my mind a lot in the last month, particularly in the last two weeks. Obviously, different things motivate different people.

Some people want to be an authority. They want to be decision makers and have control over others.

Others want to be apart of something and don't want to be on the outside looking in. They like being in a group or having affiliation.

For others it's recognition. They like getting praised or being recognized as the best at something.

Maybe you just like getting shit done or you enjoy bettering yourself. Make lists, write down goals, cross them off.

I'm not sure which one is me but I know which ones don't fit. I don't need to be a decision maker. I really have no desire to manage others and I don't need to be in control of anything. I've also never craved recognition. More often than not I'm embarrassed if I'm singled out for anything positive. If anything groups and organizations bother me. If I'm not involved with others I'm not gonna worry about it.

I'd say if there was one up there that does fit it's getting things done and seeing the results. If something isn't done I'm not comfortable until I've put in the effort to complete it. At work it might be learning a new coding technique or building an app. At home it's probably something as simple as doing the dishes or putting away the laundry. It could just be that there's a problem and it needs solving or fixing. I don't really have a choice. Things in my life need to get done or I don't sleep at night.

But what happens when there's nothing else on that list of things to do? What happens when I'm finished with my projects for work, the bills are paid and the house is clean? What gets me off my ass when there's nothing left on that list? What happens when there's nothing left to make me proactive? For almost two years I've been searching for an answer to these questions.

It only recently occurred to me that I might have found an answer: revenge.

George Herbert, a poet in the 1600s, coined the phrase "Living Well is the Best Revenge". Words to live by as far as I'm concerned. If you feel like you've been wronged or disrespected or fucked over or dissed (and I recently have), make yourself better. Much better.

That element had been missing in my life and since it's always been a massive motivator for me little has really changed for almost two years running. But all it took was a couple instances where I've felt dissed to light a fire under my ass and now my goal is to simply make myself better. Physically, socially, mentally. Better job, better relationship, better place in life. Basically the one thing that pushes me lately is the notion that one day the people that did this will think, "I made a massive fucking mistake".

3b - So it occurs to me that doing anything out of something so petty may not appear to be the most dignified or...fuck I don't even know the word.

Bleh.

A month or two ago Michael Jordan was inducted in the Basketball Hall of Fame. He went in with a class that included guys like Jerry Sloan and John Stockton. I think David Robinson went in as well.

So we're talking about a class that included some of the best basketball players and coaching minds of my generation.

However, a day after and a week after the induction ceremony only one thing was talked about: how awful Jordan came off during his speech.

Jordan has always been known to be a competitive son of a bitch. It wasn't one thing to beat you. He wanted to humiliate, embarrass and crush you until there was nothing left but a quivering pile of shit left in his wake. It didn't end on the basketball court either. Golf, gambling, checkers...everything.

What drove him was personal spite and the desire to beat you. If you told him he couldn't do something or if he felt disrespected in some way (real or manufactured in his head) he didn't rest until you were proven wrong.

One of the biggest examples of Jordan's desire to say, "I told you so" came during his induction speech. In the middle of pointing how great he was and not thanking more than one or two people (as opposed to Stockton and Robinson who couldn't thank enough people and appeared as gracious as two people could) Jordan took a moment to single out his high school coach (the man who cut him as a freshman) and say, with a point of the finger, "You made a mistake, dude".

This could have been glossed over had Jordan not personally arranged for this man to sit in the audience for the induction ceremony.

Get that? Michael Jordan – multiple MVP, gold medalist, six-time NBA Champion, six time Finals MVP, NCAA champion – harbored enough of a grudge so on the night when he was inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame he made a point to personally shove his success in the face of a high school coach who thought he wasn't good enough almost thirty years ago.

When i saw Jordan's acceptance speech I was horrified, uncomfortable and embarrassed. How could the world's most famous athlete have such little tact? How could he be so small?

Then the stories came out. I'd read Sam Smith's The Jordan Rules a decade ago so I knew what young Jordan was like. But I'd figured success and age had changed him. It didn't happen. The media was quick to come and say that the public shouldn't be surprised by the events that night. It's who Jordan was. Personal slights (real or imaginary) were what drove MJ. He was always the guy who wouldn't rest until he could give a massive "FUCK YOU" to the people he felt screwed him over and it wasn't a surprise to see him use the national stage to do so one more time.

3c - So how does that fit in with what I'm talking about? Maybe not much, if anything at all. But I think if you realize what motivates you, take the reigns and go. For Jordan, it was to shove it in the faces of those who said or felt he couldn't do something. For others it's to make someone else happy or get their approval. Some people are legitimately altruistic and feel that it's their duty to give back or help out and that's what drives them. Others just need to belong.

3d - I don't need or want anyone's approval, I'm more or less apathetic to the plight of others (though I do feel strongly about certain causes) and, with respect to John Donne, I think every man is an island.

So yea, I have what motivates me and I won't apologize for it. What's good for MJ is good enough for me.

4 - So Chicago is four hours away and I've never been there save a trip to the museum when I was like ten years old. I'm going there for New Years and we need help. If you're familiar with the town, shoot me an email or look me up on FB. I need some help.

5 - OGTs

See #3 :)

6 - The West Wing is something I've mentioned on here before, but I have to say again how awesome it is.

Tonight I got home from work, went back into town to work out for an hour, got home and watched the Badgers and decided to turn in around 11:00. Typical night. I got in bed, fired up a West Wing DVD from Season 1 and here I am, at 1:30 in the morning and I'm wide awake. I blame Aaron Sorkin.

The West Wing was supposed to be white noise, something to distract me while I fell asleep. But it kept me so captivated that I woke up. I wasn't tired anymore. My synapses were firing and I needed to write. The stupid thing is the episode I turned on was from season one. I'd seen it at least ten times. But the writing is so good and the subjects were so thought provoking that I couldn't help but pay attention. GDP and the effects on inflation, amendments to bills, child labor laws, appointments in the cabinets, security threats from white supremacists...all in one episode. I couldn't turn away.

So now it's almost two hours later, I've been cranking away at this blog since and it's mostly because it's the only way to clear my head.

7 - I called the folks this afternoon to let them know when I'll be home this week. Last year was the first time I'd made anything for Thanksgiving. I brought a broccoli casserole and the dish was gone inside of 15 minutes. People were going back for seconds. Nothing but compliments. It's one of the reasons why I've been so into cooking ever since.

This year I'm totally clueless. I have absolutely no idea what to make and I'm searching for ideas. Everything on the table is traditional and classic and that isn't what I'm good at. If anyone has a family recipe that could help me out, drop me a line. Thanksgiving is a day away and I'm a little desperate.

8 - Since I feel like I'm heading down the home stretch of this blog I started a new episode of the West Wing. Toby is being Toby, the pissed off intellectual who loves nothing more than a fight. I youtubed for a scene and the first few that came up were actually from the episode I was watching. He's great.

But instead I'll go with one from the pilot episode of the West Wing, and it ranks up there with the best TV scenes I've ever come across. Josh made a gaffe on national TV when he insulted the religious right. Consequently Toby made a meeting with heads of the religious right so CJ and Josh could apologize. Things didn't go as planned and President Bartlett makes a memorable opening.

9 - 2:00 am and I'm out. 'Til next time.

I was a little bored so...

2009-11-23T13:41:00.000-06:00

F bombs as the best form of therapy.

2009-11-20T21:02:00.000-06:00

1 - Since I've lived in the northern half of the state, namely Eau Claire and Menomonie, the Bucks have been blacked out because the NBA denotes the Wolves as the local team. It's ridiculous. It's not as if the Bucks are in the same league of popularity of Packers or Brewers up here, but there's more Bucks fans than Wolves fans.

So every year I'd write the NBA and the Bucks and Charter and DirecTV and every year I'd get no where. Back in September, like I had in the past, I wrote my letters and emails and made the phone calls to the companies that made the decisions on the matter.

This week I got good news.

The Wolves granted the Bucks permission to broadcast games in Eau Claire. All that needed to happen was for DirecTV and other cable providers to carry them. It seemed like no big deal. DirecTV carries FSN-Wisconsin and if you buy the sports pack you get that channel.

As it happens to be, here was the press release I saw this afternoon:

FOX SPORTS WISCONSIN TO TELEVISE MILWAUKEE BUCKS
GAMES IN EAU CLAIRE, WISCONSIN DURING THE 2009-10 SEASON

The Milwaukee Bucks and FOX Sports Wisconsin are pleased to announce television coverage of Milwaukee Bucks games in the Eau Claire, Wisconsin television market for the 2009-10 NBA Season. FOX Sports Wisconsin coverage of Bucks games may be found on the following channels in the Eau Claire area: Charter Communications (digital only) – Channel 91; DirecTV – Channel 669; and DISH Network – currently no dedicated channel but typically between 444 and 450. Eau Claire area customers of other cable or satellite services should contact their providers for further details.

Fox Sports Wisconsin’s Bucks programming includes 70 home or road games telecast, all including the 2009 Emmy award winning Bucks Live pre- and post-game programming. Thirty-five games are telecast in high definition (HD), ten more than last season.

The complete 2009-10 Milwaukee Bucks FOX Sports Wisconsin telecast schedule may be found on Bucks.com. http://www/bucks/schedule/index.html.

I'm a little proud. It's about five years late but it makes me feel like the phone calls to the Bucks PR department, the email correspondence with Bucks beat writers, the pissing and moaning I did with DirecTV wasn't for nothing. Speaking of which...

2 - I should feel different, having worked technical phone support for a software company for a few weeks when I was done with school. But when your issue is with a company like DirecTV, I don't care. If I'm gonna be dicked around I'll feel free to blow up on the poor sap on the other line.

The Bucks had a game on FSN earlier in the week. I'd heard that the Bucks would finally be broadcasting up here so when I got the game I didn't think much of it until I got a call from someone in EC saying they weren't getting the game. I checked my DirecTV lineup and to my amazement I'd been charged $140 for NBA League Pass. I didn't want it but because I'd puchased it last season they re-upped without alerting me. No phone call, no email, no notice in the mail.

I got right on the phone and demanded my money be refunded and League Pass be removed from my account. The Bucks were now broadcast in EC. What the hell use for LP would I have.

Even though the season just started and the free preview ended last week, some dick on the phone said that there was nothing that could be done. The deadline to cancel had been a couple days prior. So I flew off the handle and it's a good thing I was outside. I was yelling into the phone and there wasn't a four letter word I didn't drop. My last words before hanging up were, "This is fucking bullshit and I'm calling the better business bureau motherfucker!"

If he were anything like me when I used to work phones he probably laughed when I hung up. I vented, yelled a lot, called him a name or two but what does he care?

Whatever.

15 minutes later I was still pissed to the point where I didn't care to have DirecTV anymore. I called back and told the first person I got on the phone that because I was being charged for some shit I didn't order I no longer wanted DTV service and I wanted it canceled.

Ten seconds later I was on the phone with a different woman. "Oh, I see you were charged for LP and you didn't want it? Let me just get that off your account and get you a credit. Really sorry about that!"

Funny what happens when you threaten to take money out of their pockets.

3 - Speaking of the Bucks, our Young Buck has 17 points in the first quarter. This could be another big night for the twenty year old.

4 - The reason why I would have had no problem canceling our satellite TV service is for one reason: NinjaVideo.net

For over a year it the was best kept secret on the net. Every TV show and new release out there, updated daily, all in high quality Divx format. You could watch DVD quality rips of movies on your PC before they were even out in rental. Miss your favorite TV show? Check Ninjavideo. Can't find season 2 of 24 or the complete series of Firefly in your local rental store? Go to Ninjavideo.

But then PC World named it as one of it's top 100 products of 2009 and the site has rightfully blown up.

Their library is stupid-awesome and easy to access. You open up the applet, enter a code to prevent bots and restrict access, and in 60 seconds you're watching whatever you want in DVD quality.

The best part? The Divx codec they use. If you right-click on your Divx player you're able to change preferences for the player. One of the preferences is where the video is cached on your hard drive. Typically it's at a setting of 556 megabytes and the file is automatically deleted when you want to watch something else. But if you want to start a library of content it's incredibly easy. Create a new folder somewhere, set your player to save the video files in this location and change the cache size to something huge, like 40GB. When you click to start a new video in Ninjavideo's player, the download starts. Click pause on the playback and forget about it. 10 minutes later the movie is on your hard drive. Change the extension to AVI and you're free to do with it what you wish.

With TV episodes I like to convert them to m4v and watch them on my iPhone while I workout.

With movies I like to stream them to my TV in the living room using my network and a PS3.

With a computer, a high speed network and a Xbox 360 or PS3 you can have yourself your own little DVR setup without ever needing cable or satellite TV. Watch TV and movies on your time, no commercials. The only monthly payment is to your ISP.

If I wasn't such a huge sports fan I'd be all over it :/

5 - The rest of the weekend should be dope. I took the day off to make the place spotless and do some needed work. Tonight I'm going out, tomorrow it's golfing, place to myself.

I love it.

6 - Family recipe for the dinner I made tonight:

Classic Beef Stroganoff
1/2 to 3/4 lb beef sirloin or round steak about 1/2 inch thick
2 tbsp butter or margarine
1/4 lb mushrooms, sliced
1 small onion, finely chopped
1/2 cup water
1 beef bouillon cube
1 tbsp catsup
1 small clove garlic, finely chopped or 1/8 tsp instant minced garlic
1/2 teaspoon salt
Poppy Seed Noodles
1/4 cup water
1 tbsp flour
1/2 cup dairy sour cream

Cut meat into strips, 1.5 x .5 inch. Melt butter in 8 inch skillet; cook and stir mushrooms and onion until onion is tender. Remove vegetables from skillet.

In same skillet, brown meet over medium heat. Stir in half cup of water, bouillon cube, catsup, garlic and salt. Reduce heat; cover and simmer 15 minutes (45 minutes if using round steak; if necessary, add small amount of water). While meat simmers, prepare noodles.

Mix 1/4 cup water and the flour; stir into meat mixture. Add mushrooms and onion. Heat to boiling, stirring constantly. Boil and stir 1 minute. Stir in sour cream and heat through. Serve on noodles.

7 - This week Brandon Jennings was on the cover of ESPN.com for a feature story, was mentioned on Pardon the Interuption and Around the Horn, interviewed nationally on the Jim Rome Show and again on the Scott Van Pelt Show.

This is a Milwaukee Buck we're talking about here.

I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone.

7b - At the half, 20 points on 8-10 shooting, 4 assists, no turnovers. The Bucks are missing three of their four best players and are still leading the healthy Bobcats by 10.

8 - OGTs

Update on Sunday. She looked cute as hell today.

9 - Cutting this one a little short. Maybe more when I get home. Hopefully not.

Yea, only six things tonight

2009-11-17T01:11:00.000-06:00

Gonna try and make this reasonably quick hit.

1 - I need to watch more Henry Fonda flicks. He's like Cary Grant if Cary Grant wasn't constantly acting like he was trying to fuck the starlet on the set.

12 Angry Men was on earlier this evening and having never seen it I gave it a shot. I knew the reputation. If you go to IMDB you'll see that users rank it as the 8th best film of all time.

I won't go that far, but it was awesome. It consistently reminded me of Glengarry Glen Ross, for obvious reasons. Both were based upon plays, both predominantly took place in one room. Both were driven by dialog and emotion from strong male leads.

It was only the second Henry Fonda vehicle I'd seen. The first was Mister Roberts, a favorite of mine I used to watch with my late Grandpa King. I'm gonna make an effort to check out the rest of his works.

2 - My philosophy on the NBA is if you want to compete you need stars. No shit, right? The problem is the NBA, unlike every other sport, is predictable. In August, two months before the season starts, you can pick out the five teams with a chance to contend. Everyone else is tugging it.

It's the same with the draft 90% of the time. If you get a top pick in the draft it's fairly easy to predict future success. When you draft a Yao Ming, Tim Duncan, LeBron James, Carmelo Anthony, Dwight Howard, etc. it's easy to see 50 win seasons and conference championships in the near future.

But what happens when you're one of the five or so teams that doesn't have a top talent but isn't bad enough to draft at the top of round one? Basically, you're fucked. You're going to acquire mediocre talent in the draft and continue to win half your games. Never good enough to contend, never bad enough to land one of those high picks in the draft.

Sooo...this year appears to have seen an exception. More amazingly, my Bucks are the benefactors.

The Bucks were in NBA purgatory last year. Not awful, not good. Because of that they got the 10th pick in last June's draft. Usually this is where teams pick bench players to round out the roster. Maybe they get lucky and get a solid starter.

The Bucks, however, got a 20 year old stud named Brandon Jennings. Nine teams passed on this 20 year old point guard that's currently averaging 20 points, 5 boards and 5 assists. Did I mention how young he is?

2b - The previous few paragraphs were written on Friday night. The next night Brandon Jennings went out and scored 55 points, dropped five dimes and pulled down five boards in a win against the Warriors.

Then the internet blew up.

Brandon Jennings was the top trending topic on Twitter. He was on the front page of every sports site in the US. People were claiming, only a couple weeks into the season, that the Rookie of the Year award was locked up. Not only were people talking All Star (unheard of in a rookie year), but Most Valuable Player.

You know how there are moments in your life you won't ever forget? You remember everything about them? I will never forget how on a Saturday night in the Cities I was sitting on a couch at a party, looking at the box score in my iPhone, seeing Brandon Jennings with 55 points and doing a triple take.

By the way, that 25/5/5 he's currently carrying? Only two players averaged at least that last season: Dwayne Wade and LeBron James.

3 - Speaking of Saturday night, it was great. I don't make it over to the Cities but once or twice a year and I almost always have a good time. Going downtown is usually a blast and it makes the bars I'm used to seem like steaming piles of shit. It's nice to go out and not run into loads of annoying 20 and 21 year olds.

Met Neder for the first time despite having talked with her for almost two years now. Saw 'Liza for the first time in a year. Met their friends, all of them being super cool. They reminded me of the posse I had in Wausau when we were at our best. If nothing else it illustrated what's missing here in EC. I've met a lot of great people in the last two years, but it's different.

Best part of the night were the guys I drank with. Awesome, awesome cats. Talked sports, funny, really good dudes. I personally blame them for my memory getting foggy at the end of the night. They started buying shots so then I had to by a couple rounds and I woke up the next morning hoping I didn't embarrass myself by busting out a couple of my ridiculous pickup lines on some of the lovelies I'd met.

Neder assures me I was normal, so cool.

4 - If nothing else, this weekend made me realize that life needs to be more than work. If that's what's keeping you where you are or keeping you from being happiest, something is wrong. I took a job in Mankato, away from family and friends, because of money. Then I turned around and took another in EC for the same reason. I don't want to make that mistake again. Friends are more important.

5 - So today Allen Iverson was waved by the worst organization in the NBA, the Memphis Grizzlies. It's a polarizing end to what is probably the most polarizing career in NBA history.

For 99% of NBA fans, there have always been two options: either you love Allen Iverson, or you despise him. There has never been much middle room for the little lightning bug that was largely responsible for the NBA's 'thug' image. The tattoos, the cornrows, infamous "We talkin' bout practice" press conference, the street-ball style of play...Iverson was anti-everything David Stern wanted the NBA to represent.

But, like other similarl athletes, he wound up being vehemently loved by the fans he did have. Think Randy Moss. Think pre-dogfight Michael Vick. Iverson was so ridiculously talented and cool that it was easy to see how he could win over fans. It didn't matter if he didn't get himself a ring or might have been a detriment, even at his best, to his team. It was hard not to admire the way he played.

Personally, I loved watching AI play. The guy was maybe 5'10", 160. But he attacked the hoop like someone who was eight inches and 50 lbs bigger. Once he was on the court, nobody could ever accuse him of giving anything less than 100%. He took a massive beating night in and night out and he always got back up. I have nothing but respect for AI, despite his reputation. I'm going to miss watching him play.

6 - First post on the Apple laptop I picked up today. So choice. If you have the means, I highly recommend picking one up.

Music for the tortured soul

2009-11-13T03:02:00.000-06:00

I love me a good list, so I went through my iTunes and picked out the country tunes I'd liked at one point or another. I came up with a list of 184. The vast majority were from the late 80s-early 90s. The stuff my folks played when I was younger and I grew up on. Then there's a gap you get a handful of songs from the late 90s, stragglers that got through my wall of alt-rock. Include a band like the Dixie Chicks in this group. Then another big gap and you get to the poppish 'country' I started to like in the late 2000s. Ryan Adams, The Wreckers, Dustin Kensrue, Taylor Swift.

So from that list of 184 I decided I was gonna narrow it down to my top ten country tunes of all time. I made another list and went through the 184, taking any song I could conceivably see being near my Top 10. Well ho-ly-shit I wound up with 30 and they were all so awesome I decided that my top ten would be expanded by 20 tracks.

I did, however, rank 'em.

If you know anything about these tunes, you'll probably notice a distinct theme...

1 - George Strait - I can still make Cheyanne
2 - Tracy Lawrence - Texas Tornado
3 - Keith Whitley - I'm over you
4 - Garth Brooks - The dance
5 - Little Texas - White might have been
6 - McBride & the Ride - Sacred Ground
7 - Garth Brooks - What she's doing now
8 - Dixie Chicks - You were mine
9 - Diamond Rio - You're gone
10 - Keith Whitley - When you say nothing at all
11 - Alan Jackson - Gone crazy
12 - Taylor Swift - Tim McGraw
13 - Tim McGraw - Don't take the girl
14 - Trisha Yearwood - She's in love with the boy
15 - Vince Gill - Whenever you come around
16 - Tim McGraw - It's your love
17 - The Wreckers - Lay me down
18 - Little Texas - My love
19 - Ryan Adams - Wonderwall
20 - Sawyer Brown - All these years
21 - The Wreckers - Tennessee
22 - John Michael Montgomery - How was I to know
23 - Jow Diffie - Night to remember
24 - Vince Gill - Trying to get over you
25 - Clint Black - Still holding on
26 - Patty Loveless - You don't even know who I am
27 - Ty Herndon - A man holding on to a woman letting go
28 - The Wreckers - The good kind
29 - Shania Twain - The woman in me
30 - Toby Keith - You shouldn't kiss me like this

By my count, eight of the top ten are about a relationship that's done. 20 of the thirty. It's music for the broken-hearted, no joke.

That said, it's so fucking good. I haven't listened to the majority of these tunes in many years and giving this PL a listen now it's easy to see why I loved them all in the first place.

All's well that ends...

2009-11-02T00:49:00.000-06:00

1) It occurred to me 10 minutes ago, when I was starting to nod off, that I could get 8 full hours of sleep for the first time in a decade. Not wanting to break that kind of streak I got up to deliver what will almost assuredly be a quick few things.

2) The Game...

An author I enjoy reading has a column on the Levels of Losing. If you're not a sports fan, you won't understand, nor care to read it. But it's a solid description on what a fan goes through on any particular loss.

You can find it here.

I had to email Bill tonight, though...

*note: he's a ridiculous Boston Celtics fan, worships Larry Bird and grew up in the Boston Garden*

"Sorry Bill.

Nothing on your list fits or compares to what I witnessed in Lambeau just a few short hours ago.

Imagine Bird giving the Garden a massive "eff you" after killing the Celts season. To quote a crappy movie, "Multiply it by infinity, take it to the depths of forever, and you will still have barely a glimpse of what I'm talking about."

I would ask for a new level but words really don't do this kind of loss justice."

It's true. Today killed my spirit, my soul, my emotion...I feel like I'm living in limbo, just hovering above and outside of everything else that is going on. I can't feel anything and nothing seems real.

This one loss accomplished all that.

3) To rid today's events from my mind I've decided to drink as much gin as possible. I'm well on my way.

Someone actually sent me an email with this one line, and he was serious

2009-10-30T10:13:00.000-05:00

"Is there a better day of the year than opening night for the Bucks?"

So, I thought about it...sure.

• NFL Draft
• NBA Draft
• Opening Day for MLB
• Every NFL Sunday
• NBA Trade Deadline
• Opening day for Free Agency
• NFL Combine week
• Senior Bowl
• New Years Bowl Games
• NCAA Football's National Championship Game
• Every day of the NCAA Tourney
• Sunday at the Masters, US Open, British Open, PGA
• Kentucky Derby or any of the other two provided there's a shot a Triple Crown
• MLB Draft
• MLB Trade deadline
• Friday
• Christmas
• Thanksgiving
• Any holiday that gets me a day off
• Halloween
• Any Tuesday in which a good new movie arrives for rental
• Any Thursday with a new episode of Supernatural
• Men's Final at the Open and Wimbledon
• Any day I get Ciciones Cajun pasta
• Any day I get to cook for someone

I don't know. Those are just off the top of my head.

If You Really Wanna Hear About It

2009-10-23T03:03:00.000-05:00

1) Quick question: you had it to do all over again, what profession would you get into?

a) Politician - I never would have picked this five years ago. But after five years of getting everything I want via my powers of persuasion and charm and speech, I think I could have done some serious good. No joke, I could talk a dog off a meat truck.

b) Sportswriter - My family thinks I was made for it. I probably was. I follow sports like it's my job, I can write and I've got alcohol issues. If I could be the next Dan Jenkins I would die a happy man.

c) General Manager - I used to think that being a GM was something way above my level of sports expertise. Not any more. I'm totally convinced I could do John Hammond's job. Or Zeke's. Or whoever the hell is doing the job in Memphis.

d) Web developer - My current job.

Honestly, I like my current career. I don't arrive home stressed. I'm good at my job. I've got responsibilities and a say in what we develop. I'm about to be on the street but that's not an indictment on my abilities. I could have another job in two weeks if I wanted one.

***

***

4 - Six months ago Ben swiped and broke my $170 Bose headphones. I MacGyver'd this shit outta 'em and now they're working. But for the time in between I was listening to earbuds and generic headphones and I got used to the sound quality. I forgot how amazing a great set of headphones could sound.

I implore you: buy a top-notch set of headphones. Not Skull Candy shit or Sony or Phillips...go top shelf.

Normally I'm not a Bose guy. I love the highs but they lack the depth and base in their home audio. But their headphones are sick.

Reviews are up and down, but if i was ever gonna recommend a set it'd be these:

http://www.amazon.com/around-ear-headphones-personal-portable-listening/dp/B000MMWT9Q/ref=sr_1_4?ie=UTF8&s=electronics&qid=1256281424&sr=8-4

No lie, $140 is a steal.

***

6 - Gonna share the recipe for a perfect steak.

Marinade:

1 1/2 tbs butter per 12 oz steak
1 tbs garlic powder
1 tbs onion power
2 tbs Worcestershire sauce
1/4 c. steak sauce

Bring that shit to a mild boil in a small pot and immediately remove it from heat. Stir.

Place the steak on a broiler pan and baste the top and sides in the marinade. I recommend a NY strip, but any reasonably thick cut of meat should be great.

Give it a liberal coat of pepper. Apply a thin layer of regular salt and Lowery's seasoning salt.

Start the oven broiler on high heat and put the steak in the oven 4-6 inches from the broiler. Leave in the oven for five minutes.

Take it out and flip the steak. Repeat the baste, salt, pepper steps.

Place back in the oven for three minutes.

Take it out and let it sit for four minutes. The steak will continue cooking and end medium.

Top with a dollop of garlic butter and enjoy.

7 - Is it a fundamental thing with women that they believe that they can change or mold men into being the person that they want to marry? I only ask because lately women have bugged the shit outta me. Guys don't change.

8 - Ti'll tomorrow.

We interupt your regularly scheduled blog

2009-10-20T01:42:00.000-05:00

So I was balls deep into a blog about the last five days and it was going well. I'll have it done tomorrow.

But I ran into a thread on PCs vs Macs and to my dying day I'll defend the motherfuck out of my favorite little machines.

Here was what the instigator said:

its a trend to get a mac... i see so many people with them and all they use them for is word processing and surfing the internet. if you have the money, why not? but you can easily do that stuff with a PC for 1/2 the price.

My reply:

I've seen that excuse for ten years. That buying a mac is a trendy thing to do. At what point does it stop being a trend? As for the reason people wouldn't go with a PC, I think most would prefer not having to worry about malware, spyware and viruses killing their machine.

His reply:

being a fashion statement is not an excuse, its just something ive simply observed. why spend an extra $1000 for a prettier screen if you're going to be doing the same things. as for the malware, spyware and viruses, i've had a few problems on my pc with them, but it's never anything i couldn't fix. i take care of my computers... as for the general population, maybe they don't.

every single future project moving forward will be intel base required. this includes the later versions of Xcode (which i primarily use for apps)... i know there are work arounds, but if you've ever done any app programming, you'd know certificate issues and approval from the apple store can be a real pain... having a tinkered with copy of xcode just complicates things tremendously more.

anyways my main point wasn't to compare the older macs with the newer one, it was to simply state that macs are VERY expensive and to the average person, you can handle all your needs on a pc for half the price.

and another person jumped on...

Just look the price of any macbook... It's a fashion statement.

And this is what killed my blog writing for tonight. This reply:

I've made similar posts here in the past, but I own two Macs and three PCs. Two still work as well as the day I bought them and the other three won't boot. I can let you guess which work and which don't.

So I ask you, what was the better investment?

Was it the Alienware laptop, the Dell laptop, the do-it-yourself PC that gave me a good six months before going to ****?

Or was it the two Macs that do everything I need and still do it as well as the day they were bought?

I'm not an idiot when it comes to computers. I worked three years as a PC repairman and computer technician while in college. In that time I must have taken a look at 120 PCs. I never looked at a single Mac. I also work as a web developer and have to do testing on a PC every day.

The bottom line is if you buy a Mac and don't drop it you should have it for a decade or more. That's without having to buy Norton or McAfee or download constant security patches or worry that the attachment you receive or the website you visit is going to destroy your computer.

You're paying extra for the knowledge that your OS is light years better than what's available on a PC, it's more secure, more stable, less prone to depreciation and simply works more logically. But if Windows blows your skirt up, you can even dual boot.

To be honest I don't know why the general public would waste their money on a PC. Gaming I guess? I don't know about that.

I'm a geek. And it's 1:42 am. Time to pop in an episode of something awesome and get in bed.

I'll think of a better title tomorrow

2009-10-17T05:21:00.000-05:00

it's 5:20 in the morning. I just had one of the longest days of my life and I just got home.

M O T H E R F U C K E R.

Goodnight.

There's a light inside my head, flickering, but almost dead

2009-10-13T16:33:00.000-05:00

1 - First of all, that fucking moon deserved it.

Frankly, it was a ticking time bomb and you don't screw around with diplomacy or threat level dossiers with the Moon hanging over our heads. It's been trying to gain our flank for a millennia but you never know when disaster could strike. It could happen at any time. Obama saw a threat and fired the first shot; lets see if the Moon bothers us ever again.

Also, you right wingers that thought the President was weak? screw countries, he took on an entire heavenly body.

2 - If you're of the faint of heart, skip to number three. But on Sunday I made the most delicious sandwich...a grilled PB&J with BACON. The smokey, the sweet....yum.

2b - Then I went to the gym :/

3 - It's weird how one person can make the same phrase repeat in your head every time you see or think about 'em. Every time I see the current OOMA or she finds her way into my thought process, all I can think is, "She's so fucking cute". Just those four words. Sometimes I even have to shake my head. She's just sooo....fucking....cute.

4 - The mom continues to impress.

There I am in 4th place, and there she is in 2nd. She's also dominating in the percentage correctly picked. 76.32 is tops in our league of 92 people.

I shudder to think what she'd do in Vegas.

5 - Party this weekend. It's EC's homecoming and Wausau homies are coming over for some shenanigans. I'm offering up a quick sorry to those that are certain to receive drunk texts.

6 - I've been on a serious West Wing kick lately and while I love the show, it's also a little depressing. All of these politicians are idealized versions of what we all want to see in our representatives. They're thoughtful, intelligent and driven to make our country a better place. I can't say that about the people we elect in the real world. Obama was nice change from the brainless hack we had in there for the last eight years, but I'm gonna need to see some results soon. Health care would be a great start.

But seriously, wouldn't you like to see someone that can give you chills? Someone that can inspire?

Wouldn't you like to see someone like Texas congressman Matt Santos? Check out this speech (supposed to be one of concession at the National Democratic Convention but winds up being something totally different).

Fuck.

Tell me that doesn't give you some serious goose bumps.

7 - Now, maybe you aren't a big sports fan. Maybe you don't know anything about basketball.

But trust me when I say this is the most fucked up shot chart I've ever seen.

It was from last night's Bucks game. They're gonna be so god damn bad this season.

The masochist in me can't wait to see it.

8 - So Rush Limbaugh wants to buy an NFL team and the Players Union is outraged. Even the owner of the Colts came out against it.

"I, myself, couldn't even consider voting for him," Irsay said at today's NFL owners meetings. "When there are comments that have been made that are inappropriate, incendiary and insensitive... our words do damage, and it's something we don't need."

I agree(d).

Now......I'm not entirely sure.

I was listening to the radio and heard a take on it that made me reconsider. It was pointed out that almost 500 NFL players have been cited for serious offenses since 2000. Drug use, gun charges, drunk driving, battery, spousal abuse...you name it. Yet all these guys get second chances and now they're the same people that are taking the moral high ground against Limbaugh.

I don't mind it if someone wants to voice their opinion and I'm certainly no fan of Limbaugh, but I can't stomach hypocrisy. So the Players Union won't support Rush's bid, but they'll welcome felons into their league? The owners don't want him in their brethren but they'll sign a defensive end that killed a woman or a cornerback that paralyzed another man via gunshot?

It's bullshit.

9 - I hate it when someone asks me to critique a design and I can't offer up any suggestions. Ben asked me for my thoughts on a logo he put together and all I could say was, "I like it. Great job".

But the fact is he's the best graphic designer I've ever worked with and he does phenomenal stuff.

10 - This blog is running a little long, I know. But in my family, someone who uses one word to say something when they could have used ten just isn't trying hard enough.

My religious thoughts for the night

2009-10-13T00:40:00.000-05:00

1 - This happened over a year ago and I remember reading about it back then, but the verdict came down last week.

From the AP.

This interested me for a few reasons.

- a mother and father, among others, prayed around young Kara while she lay on the ground dying. She did. It was only then that someone had the bright idea to call 911

- it happened in a town I recently lived in.

- I have a heart and it bleeds when I read stories like these.

I want to rant. I won't. I'll just tell an anecdote I heard once...

A man lived by the river. He heard a radio report that the river was gonna rush up and flood the town. That all the residents should evacuate their homes.

But the man said, "I'm religious. I pray. God loves me. God will save me."

The waters rose up, a man in a boat came by and shouted, "Hey, hey you! You in there! The town is flooding. Let me take you to safety".

But the man shouted back, "I'm religious. I pray. God loves me. God will save me".

A helicopter was hovering over head and a guy with a megaphone shouted, "Hey you, you down there. The town is flooding. Let me drop this ladder and take you to safety".

But the man shouted back that he was religious, that he prayed, that god loved him and god would take him to safety.

Well, the man drowned.

So he's standing at the gates of St. Peter and he demands an audience with god.

"Lord," he says, "I'm a religious man. I pray. I thought you loved me. Why did this happen?"

God said, "I sent you a radio report, a helicopter and a guy in a boat. What the hell are you doing here?"

God dammit, one more

2009-10-08T03:03:00.000-05:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20091001/ap_on_sc/us_sci_before_lucy

Do you ever get those moments when your brain is trying to wrap your head around everything you're reading or hearing and you have to step back and say, "Wait, hold up".

That was me a few paragraphs into the above link.

They throw out this stat that human evolution started a million years before currently accepted science, and it's treated more like a byline than anything.

Seriously, hold up a sec. We're talking about a jump of almost 25% of human existence in a single yahoo article.

I'm turning the computer off for the night. This is too much to get my head around at 3:03 in the morning.

Oh, one more thing

2009-10-08T02:46:00.000-05:00

The best stretch of music on any album I've heard in recent memory belongs to tracks four, five, six and seven on Breaking Benjamin's Dear Agony.

#4 - Give Me a Sign

#5 - Hopeless

#6 - What Lies Beneath

#7 - Anthem of the Angels

Ridiculously good. I've been conditioned to expect crummy music the more an artist or band churns out music, but I'm thrilled to say that the recent stuff from old favorites has been awesome.

Her eyes, shades on the darkside, neutralize every man in sight

2009-10-06T01:42:00.000-05:00

Quick hitters today:

1 - For the first time in a while I've got new music to digest.

AFI - Crash Love
Paramore - Brand New Eyes
Breaking Benjamin - Dear Agony
Three Days Grace - Life Starts Now

Early returns make me think they're all winners. I'll say more once I get through my 4th and 5th listens.

2 - I shouldn't have even come to work today. I've been totally useless to SP. My accomplishments have been:

• Got the guest list in order for tonight

• Debated the Milwaukee Bucks at RealGM.com for a good two hours

• Picked up the latest AFI and TDG.

• Figured out what food I'd be providing later

• wrote most of this blog

3 - OGT's.

At what point do you sort of start to feel guilty about who you're dating? In high school it'd happen if you were a senior dating the super hot freshman or sophomore. In college it was calling your layup at bar-time and getting her out of your place before your boys woke up the next morning. Is there an equivalent now when you become a young professional?

3b - If this goes bad what'll hurt most is probably the notion that I'll have to get my coffee somewhere else in the morning.

3c - I should have thought this through long ago.

4 - Crash Love is the surprise of the year. Like I keep looking at the iPod to make sure I'm actually listening to AFI. It's remarkable.

5 - My mom is funny. Year in and year out she straight dominates an NFL pick 'em pool myself, her and about 120 other family and friends are in. She might win $600 over the course of a year.

So when I got a phone call at 9:30 last night I knew it was gonna be her. I had just nailed 14/15 games on the day, only losing my lowest pick. I was in 4th place on the week and depending on tonight's game I could either be 2nd or 4th on the week.

If the Vikes win I'm in the money.
If the Pack wins I'm happy as shit for the week and likely longer.

6 - Another question was posed this weekend. What do you think is better: a great TV show or a great movie.

I didn't even think it was a question. Great TV easily.

Look, I love Casablanca. But if it's Bogie for 90 minutes or President Josiah Bartlett for 100 hours, I'm going with The West Wing.

I loved Se7en, but give me four seasons of Battlestar Galactica.

Here is what someone else had to say on the subject:

Anyway, both have their own strengths. I would personally prefer comedy, and since I think it is generally more effectively designed for a TV format, I would say I prefer TV--I definitely spend a lot more time watching shows than movies simply because there is a lot more entertainment out there. And in the last decade general movie quality has been relatively weak, while TV quality has been outstanding. TV is kicking the crap out of film right now.

I think the general rule with lots of things--but with TV in particular--is that over time, things go to greater extremes. There isn't as much on now that's just kind of "meh". Like things like Friends, or That 70's Show where you're like "this isn't terrible, but ultimately...meh". Most things now are either total dogs**t, or really damn good. And if you avoid the dogs**t, you'll see what's so great about a lot of TV now. It's diverse (not stupid diverse--I mean real diversity--formats, styles, approaches), it's smart, and it's more boundless than ever. We are in a golden age of television. So as an over all question, it's debatable. Right now, I think it's definitely TV.

Good call. I love my TV dramas. Not CSI or ER or Law & Order. I'm talking long arches, the ones that take years to wrap up. The ones with twists out of left field, characters being killed off, stories that make you think and trigger emotion. The best movies can do that, but not all. The best dramas can invoke those thoughts dozens of times over the course their runs.

7 - Speaking of good drama, last night before I fell asleep I watched what is one of the greatest episodes of TV in the last ten years.

It's the second to last episode of season 4 of The West Wing. It's called Commencement.

Let me set the scene:

- The President's daughter just graduated from Georgetown and she's set to tour Europe with her lame French boyfriend for the summer
- They're celebrating at a DC night club before they fly away
- The President, the NSA and the Joint Chiefs had a middle-eastern diplomat killed a year earlier because he had ties to a terrorist cell
- A reporter has figured it out and is now questioning the Press Secretary. Not wanting to call it, "That time we killed the brown dude", they refer to it as the "Mudross Research Project".
- Everything else isn't exactly important for the sake of the following video (though it is fucking awesome when Mary Louise Parker asks, "Donna, are you in love with Josh"...all the more reason to watch the show!)

How it was done is something I don't know if I'll ever see on TV again. Everything about it was perfect. The soundtrack, the camera work, the dialogue, the shifting between characters...it was all awesome. When you see the reaction and then the closing credits, no joke, you'll get chills.

I cut it up and dropped it on youtube:

8 - 12:18 am...

This one hurts. It isn't the loss. It isn't because I thought this one could have necessarily been ours. It's not even because we stopped AD cold. It's because Favre won it and he didn't even have to work for it.

I would have to watch the game again, but it appeared as if the Packers were able to stop Peterson with their front seven, sometimes six. Give the line and the linebackers credit, they stayed true to their gaps and didn't make many mistakes tackling.

But my god...the defensive playcalling on obvious passing downs. How, in the name of everything holy, can you only rush three against a guy that's been in the league for nearly two decades. Give this guy time to throw and of course he's going to pick you apart.

Yes, the DBs had some mental errors. But any defense is gonna give up big passing plays when the QB has time to bake a cake in the pocket. Favre never once in looked uncomfortable. It was rare that he was forced to give up the ball early. For fuck's sake, if he's picking you apart when you're dropping eight, could it really hurt to rush five or six? Whatever happened to the exotic schemes we saw against Cutler? What we saw tonight was the Bob Sanders defense all over again, and it just leaves me feeling disgusted.

Second, not all the sacks were on the offensive line. That unit on the left side obviously didn't play well, but Rodgers has got to learn to GET RID OF THE FUCKING BALL. The safety is entirely on him. So were at least three of the other sacks. Against line like that, he's got to have that clock in his head ticking. 1, 2, 3, get rid of the ball or fucking run with it. Again, without watching it a second time I don't know how much the play calling had to do with this. But if Rodgers doesn't have an easy checkdown on every throw, namely to the TE, something is seriously wrong.

The Packers offense is obviously at its best when Rodgers can take a couple steps and deliver a quick strike. Make him roll out, maybe. But if he's gotta take a 5 or 7 step drop he's gonna get killed. The line can't block that long and Rodgers holds the ball too often.

This game could have been different. Lee drops a TD that turns out to be a death sentence. Rodgers throws a terrible INT deep in their territory. The fumble.

This is a game that I think looks worse than it really was and it was for the eye popping plays. The sacks, the big strikes by Favre. Lost in the shuffle was the fact that the Packers ran the ball when they attempted it. Rodgers had a good completion percentage and yards per attempt. They stopped AD cold.

Despite the defensive scheme and the sacks, this game was still relatively close.

9 - Good turnout here, though.

I'm surprised we didn't get complaints from the neighbors but it was a good time.

Getting the food and making it was a pain in the ass. Only now is it dawning on me that I paid $91 for food and drinks tonight. There are a lot of leftovers but unless I want to live at the gym this week I'm not sure how much I want to indulge on cream cheese, Mayo, beef, sour cream and Velveeta.

9b - I liked the compliments on got on my place. Everyone that came through mentioned how great it looked. Glad to know the hard work didn't go unnoticed.

9c - Neither did the food. "Fucking amazing" was the term I most often heard.

*

One long, slow trainwreck

2009-10-02T01:34:00.000-05:00

1) You ever start a movie and almost instantly know it's gonna be one of your favorites? WALL-E was one. Garden State was another.

500 Days of Summer absolutely is. It's awesome. Almost immediately I'm seeing myself and my friends in these two characters. It's impossible not to. Either you've been one of these people or you know one of these people. Maybe you've been both. I know I have.

I'm trying to write while watching it. It's 1:00 am and I might be keeping the neighbors and my brother up with my laughter. The scene with the Hall and Oats song is one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

On the other-hand, I'm someone who can't stand to watch embarrassing situations. Or train-wrecks you can see coming a mile away. Or anything that reminds me of a time when I was not-awesome and I look back at myself horrified. There are a shit-ton of scenes like this. Like pretty much to the point where I had to turn my head and plug my ears.

I know, I'm a dope.

1b) I can't believe the sister from Almost Famous is now this super famous actress depicting everything that frustrates and demolishes men like me.

1c) There can't be much left of this movie. I don't know how it can possibly end in a way that doesn't leave me completely and utterly fucking hopeless and depressed. That said, 500 Days is still super awesome.

1d) OK, it just ended and I'm grinning like a bastard.

GO SEE IT!

:)

Let's see how long this lasts...

2009-09-28T15:05:00.000-05:00

I'm shutting myself out of my favorite websites, at least during work hours. Today I blocked the following domains:

Realgm
Facebook
Twitter
ESPN
Sports Illustrated
Football's Future
Milwaukee Journal-Sentinal
Brewerfan.net
Deadspin

Those nine sites take up a shameful portion of my day. If they aren't available, my hope is my focus gets funneled back into my job.

Yes, I can unblock them whenever I wish. But this is about staying focused and productive at work and I'm gonna at least try to take away my avenues for slacking.

A Good Walk Spoiled

2009-09-27T22:39:00.000-05:00

Last week I read a blog entry written by a woman in which she describes the various types of men you're likely to meet on a golf course.

1- The daddy: Older men usually love my presence and take me under their wing. They act like surrogate dads and are really nice to me, even nicer when they see that I can play. I love it :)
2- The flirt: Ohhh, a woman... Maybe she'll want to have sex with me? I get the phone numbers of the bravests and the others merely flirt with me during the round. They're usually harmless and sweet, but can sometimes be a bit agressive and become a hassle (when you're stuck with someone who's hitting on you for 5 hours and you're not interested, it can be a bit long...)
3- The couple: Now the guy could fall into the flirt category, but wife is right beside him. So he has to be nice to me while at the same time making sure not to be too nice to me... This guy should never, ever compliment me too much in front of his wife, especially, as it's often the case, if I play better than her. I remember one who had the nerve to tell his wife: "Do like Sylvie does, honey". Oh boy... Poor guy :)
4- The macho: Now that's the type of man I can't stand. It's the type of guy who might start by barely noticing my presence and making sure only to talk to his buddies. Then he might act frustrated and humiliated when I'm playing better than him. He might make me feel that I shouldn't be there and that he's annoyed to see a woman on the course. These guys are rare. But believe me, when I get paired with one of them, it makes for the longest 5 hours...
5- The nice guy: Now that's the majority and they're the reason why I still play on my own, because most often I meet really nice people :)

I'll add these kinds of golfers.

1) The guy who's only golfing because it's the one place he knows his wife or girlfriend won't be. Outside of my brother this is the kind I play golf with most. It's the single biggest reason I'm happy that I'm single. If you think I'm kidding, really, I'm not. If it's golf or the love of a good woman, I'm sorry, but I'm hitting the links.

2) The guy who is only in it for the beer. He wants to get drunk and doing it in the sun is more fun than doing it indoors at a bar.

3) The guy who absolutely sucks, owns dogshit Wal-Mart clubs and is really only there because golf makes him feel better about himself than he actually deserves. He might enjoy bowling or softball more, but golf puts him out there with people that wear shirts with sleeves to work every day. He's probably wearing jeans.

These guys can be serious pains in the ass because they don't know shit about golf etiquette. I don't have problem with shitty golfers. If you suck, the best way to learn is probably on the course. But if you're terrible, observe these simple rules:

- Let the people behind play through. Even if they aren't on your ass, wait at the next tee box for the people behind you to catch up and let them hit. Who knows. Maybe you see what they're doing well and you learn something.

- Go easy on the practice swings Chief. Whether you take one or five you're still hitting a shitty shot.

- Continuous play. Observe it. Even the good players don't observe the "whomever's furthest away hits" rule most occasions. If you're at your ball and are ready to hit, give it a rip.

- You don't have to walk or drive next to your partners. Few things bug me more than watching groups of people drive up to each other's shots instead of going right to their own.

- If the beer lady comes around and you flag her down, you better motherfucking let the group behind play through.

- Don't spend 10 minutes looking for a lost ball if you have people a hole behind you. Don't worry about it, they aren't gold fucking nuggets

- If you're bringing a kid along, don't let them hit balls unless no one's behind you. I think it's awesome when parents bring their little ones out there to hit balls. Just don't do it if it means holding up everyone else.

- Don't argue or make a scene when you think you know golf etiquette when you don't. I'm really only making this rule because of something Ben and I experienced earlier in the summer. We were behind a couple sleeveless, jean wearing fucks that were putting their way up Mill Run and holding everyone up. When we got to a short par four Ben and I literally watched them hit their drives from the box and they wouldn't let us play through.

When they got to the green I hit my drive. Dead center, a good 315 yards. It was still 40 yards from the green but the twosome ahead of us stopped what they we doing and stared at me for a good minute.

I couldn't believe it. It was surreal. Not only were they playing terribly, playing slow and not letting us go through, but now they felt either threatened and/or insulted.

Look, it's a 350 yard PAR-FUCKING-FOUR. Anyone would hit their drive if they were in my spot.

So I'm sort of laughing, not believing what I'm witnessing. I tell Ben to go ahead and hit (they're still staring at us from the green). He does and it goes right down the middle, nearly as far as mine.

They raise their arms as if to say, "What the fuck?!?" and continue to glare. Hell, not only do they glare, but they fuck around on the green for a good five minutes while Ben and I walk up the fairway to our drives. We stop about halfway and just watch. We don't get any closer because, frankly, one of them looks like Hulk Hogan and I'm positive he could kill us both.

In the meantime a group behind us has caught up and they're on the box, so now the two fucks in front of us are holding up a few groups. I go back to the group behind us and explain what happened and even they can't believe what happened.

Eventually they get the hint and move on. Ben and I finish the hole and skip three holes to play 17, 18 and 19 coming back. No need to get into a conversation with a guy that looked as if he wanted to kill me.

But the point of this example is this: if you suck, realize it. Know that there are people on the course that are better and faster. If you don't let people play through, you not only hold up that group but everyone behind them. You could be holding up people for what amounts to hours, and I'm not even exaggerating.

4) The tenured member. I'm related to a couple of these. They're easy to locate. For one, they tend to be old(er). Usually 45+. They always wear their shirts tucked in. They never walk.

The defining characteristic? They NEVER let people play through. If you're on their asses, you're either cheating or playing too fast and damn it all if you're just gonna have to slow down or wait. They've been playing this game for too long and paid too much money to experience the indignity of letting some kid play through.

It's these fucks that I can't stand. Ignorance, like in the example above, I get. They just don't know any better.

But if you're an avid golfer and you still don't let people play through it's inexcusable. You're basically giving the rest of the course a big Fuck You and costing people their time and rounds.

This gets into another issue. If you're rushed or having to wait, your round is likely to suffer. Today is a prime example.

I went to hit nine holes after the Packer game and it started great. Greened a par 4 first hole and birdied. Next hole was a par three that I always bogey, but I knocked one stiff and got out with a par. So now I'm -1 after two quick holes and I'm thinking about having one of my better rounds of the summer.

Unfortunately, I got behind two guys that sucked, played slow and wouldn't let me go through. I waited on 3, 4, 5 and 6 and my game suffered. They let me play through and I finished with three pars.

Golf is such a mental game. If you're pissed or nervous or upset or whatever...you won't be playing well. But if you can focus on your game and don't worry about everything else, you might have the chance to put up a good score. It's bullshit like the stuff above that absolutely ruins a good time and turn a goal of playing well into a, "eh, fuck it" kind of round.

There's a feeling I get when I look to the West

2009-09-26T02:44:00.000-05:00

Question was posed to me a couple days ago and I didn't sit down to think about it until tonight.

The world is coming to an end and it's just you and your spouse left. You can save 80 minutes of music (one CD). What do you chose?

Here was my list (when in doubt I usually went with the shorter tunes):

Led Zeppelin - Stairway to Heaven (8:01)
Jeff Buckley - Hallelujah (6:53)
Al Green - I'm Still In Love With You (3:03)
Alicia Keys - Fallin (3:30)
Bob Marley - Redemption Song (3:49)
Bruce Springsteen - I'm on Fire (2:42)
The Descendants - Silly Girl (live version) (2:09)
Diana Ross & The Supremes - You Keep Me Hangin' On (3:15)
Massive Attack - Angel (6:19)
The Doors - Break On Through (2:26)
Eminem - Lose Yourself (5:26)
George Straight - I can still make Cheyenne (4:11)
Guns N' Roses - Welcome to the Jungle (4:33)
Jimi Hendrix - All Along the Watchtower (3:59)
Kelly Clarkson - Since U Been Gone (3:09)
Norah Jones - Come Away With Me (3:18)
Otis Redding - (Sittin' On) The Dock Of The Bay (2:42)
Patsy Cline - Crazy (2:44)
Warren G - Regulate (4:09)
Yeah yeah yeah's - Maps (3:40)

1:19:58

Again there were SERIOUS trade-offs. Lots of tunes I wanted on here, but if they got over 4:30 in length I knew they would be costing a couple shorter songs their spots. In the end I wanted variety instead of the best of the best (which might have only been 8-10 songs).

The first two were the only absolute, stone cold locks. I knew I wanted Stairway and Hallelujah the moment I sat down to figure this out.

The rest is a mixed bag. Certainly not a representation of the best music ever, but then again I'm not an expert on music either. I've also got time restraints. Sorry Beethoven.

I tried to get a mix of genres.

- I chose Since U Been Gone over Billy Jean (pop)

- Welcome to the Jungle over Smells like Teen Spirit (honestly, time was the determining factor here)

- The Doors got in because of the instruments and the length of Break on Through.

- George and Patsy help out the country side.

- Warren and Eminem for hip-hop, thought I could have gone with EPMD or Mob Deep.

- Massive Attack, despite the length, had to be on there. Electronica, trippy, big time sound.

- I needed something punk. I thought Dead Kennedys but I don't know if they have the influence. The Descendants do. They invented pop-punk. When you hear The Ataris, Green Day, Paramore, New Found Glory and countless other four-chord wonders singing about teenage years and lost love, thank The Descendants. Silly Girl works for this list.

- Alicia Keys, her pipes and her piano needed inclusion.

- Jimi had to show what a guitar is capable of.

I'm satisfied.

The Four Happiest Girls to Ever Be Arrested

2009-09-25T11:54:00.000-05:00

are found here.

Five actresses and a cameraman from the CW show “The Vampire Diaries” were arrested and charged after police said the actresses were dangling off a Georgia overpass and flashing drivers.

Several drivers called 911 on Aug. 22 to report seeing the young women flashing drivers on I-75 from the side of the Rumble Road overpass just north of Macon.

The women told Monroe County authorities they were just filming for the show.

I have a long, shameless history of watching whatever the CW churns out.

First it was Smallville. Then One Tree Hill. Then Supernatural. Then Reaper. I've resisted checking out The Vampire Diaries and The Beautiful Life. Both just look too god damn stupid.

But alright, I'm sold. I'll be tuning in next week.

Time to break the ten things up

2009-09-23T13:25:00.000-05:00

This started out as a 10 things. It got to be too damn long. From now on I'm only penning one at a time.

Six years ago I was a junior at Stout. Just saying that absolutely floors me.

Anyway, I was in a critical writing class and one of our assignments required us to take a side in a specific question asked in a text book and then defend the stance with evidence to back it up. Pretty straight forward.

I don't remember the exact question or problem I chose. I know it had to do with drug abuse and and that's about it. But whatever, that's mostly irrelevant. What I most took away from that assignment is how the people you respect and admire from afar are also people like you and I at their core.

While doing research for the drug assignment one name came up more than any other: Maia Szalavitz. She'd helped write a book, been published in leading scientific and medical journals and was quickly on her way to being known as one of the foremost experts in drug addiction and treatment.

Finding material wasn't tough. Her stuff was everywhere to read. After one particular article, one on an obscure site, was something I don't often see online: a phone number. It didn't necessarily say to whom, it was just at the bottom in a brief explanation of who Maia Szalavitz was. I thought it might have been her publisher's office. Or maybe the number to the organization for which she'd written the article. Hell, maybe just an answering service. But that night I'd been captivated by her writing. She wrote with authority and compassion and personality and heart. So even if I got the brush off from a literary agent I figure it wouldn't hurt to dial the number up.

So I did, and Maia Szalavitz answered. It was, of course, her home fucking number in New York City.

So immediately I do a quick, semi-audible, "Oh shit". Then I re-group and try to offer an explanation of who the hell I was, why the hell I was calling and (maybe most important) how the hell I got her home telephone number.

She was amazing. If you've ever spoken to someone passionate about their work you would know what it was like to speak to her that night. This wasn't a woman who did what she did solely to earn a paycheck. She legitimately cared about what she researched, studied and wrote about. It came through loud and clear in our conversation.

After the shock had subsided of finding out her home number was published online, I told her about my assignment, how I'd found out who she was and why I was interested in picking her brain. She was more than acomodating. We talked about specific articles she'd written, her personal views, public policy and how it might help me out. I gave her my e-mail. She sent me a volume of resources specific to what I was looking for. I said thank you, goodnight and she wished me well.

My paper ended up being one of the best I'd written. I've included it with my resume in past job applications even if the position didn't require any writing at all. I got a fucking B. My instructor was floored with the lengths I'd gone to write a great paper. It was was loaded with resources, my critical views on the subject, technically correct, etc. Unfortunately the end result had almost nothing to do with the original question posed. I had intended to stick with the goal of the assignment but my paper morphed into something else and I ran with it. So I was docked a letter grade.

Whatever. Like I said, the paper itself wasn't what I was taking out of this little exercise. It was that there are professionals out there that you only ever see and read that appreciate interacting with their readers. Authors, journalists, reporters, athletes, actors, government officials.....whatever. These people that care enough to put themselves out there on display aren't always doing this behind a glass wall. If you take the time to drop them a line, I think you'll be surprised what you get out of them.

Since that day if I've happened to read something I appreciate I'll probably find a way to drop the author a short message. I would estimate that 95% of the time I get a thoughtful response. Many times I'll get posed questions in return and discussions or debates start. Hell, a couple times I've been offered home phone numbers so they could talk to me after the work day was done. In each occurrence, I said that I was sincerely grateful but would respectfully decline. But I do appreciate the gesture more than these people will probably ever know. I think it's great that they're so willing to hash it out with the public.

On a closing note, not until today did I go back and google Maia Szalavitz. I wanted to thank her and let her know how I did on that paper she helped me write. I lost her email years ago and it was one of those things I always intended to to but never did. As it turns out, her career has absolutely taken off. She's written couple books, been published in some of the most respected news papers in the world, had articles published in Time magazine and is now a featured blogger for the Huffington Post. She's written more entries than I think I can count. Not surprisingly, as she's become more successful she's gotten tougher to get ahold of. I couldn't find an email or phone number. Maia, if you ever happen to come upon this blog, "Thank you".

F.U.C.K.E.D.

2009-09-20T21:58:00.000-05:00

1 - After the Packer game today I was almost despondent. For a month people have been singing their praises and talking up their talent. They were one of the NFC's best and a good shot to make it to the Super Bowl. No lie, I ate it up. I bought right in.

But after a troubling performance against the Bears and a devastating loss at home to the Bengals, the Packers have been exposed as frauds.

Personally, I was numb. It was like I'd just witnessed a car crash and didn't know how to act. This happens when you live and die with your favorite teams.

That lasted about an hour, because I soon after went through something much worse:

The Shanks.

Don't bother to look it up in the Urban Dictionary; none of the definitions work or do it justice. I'll help you out.

Shanks (nown): A soulless, unforgiving motherfuck that toys with your emotions, kills your spirit and demolishes your will. It will show up unexpectedly, stay as long as it wishes and is nearly impossible to defeat. If you have The Shanks, you know almost instantly, and it's like your guts have been ripped out from your insides.

Let me paint the picture, set the scene if you will...

Before the Packer game was over I'd chalked it up to a loss. Even as they recovered the on-side kick I didn't bother watching the final minute. I was already putting on the golf shoes. Ben decided he'd go with. We got to Princeton Valley and got a large bucket of balls to hit before our rounds.

At first, everything was fine. I pulled out the lob wedge and launched a few pretty balls at the green 75 yards away. Then I hit some with the pitching wedge and again, everything was alright. I grabbed the nine-iron, and all of the sudden everything went to shit.

*ting!*

I hit it and my worst nightmare started. The ball (that little dimpled son of a bitch) instead of going straight sliced a hard right. Picture a perfect golf shot as going at a 90 degree angle. This ball went to about 15 degrees. It was so bad that someone hitting up the range from me had to glance my way with a "What the fuck" kind of look.

OK. One shot like that isn't the end of the world. It's the second that lets you know whether you're fine or if you're in for one of the worst stretches of golf in your life.

Unfortunately for me it was the latter.

There were about forty balls left in that bucket. I would estimate that 80% were shanks that all did the exact same thing. The other 20% were a mix of dubs and chunks. My swing that had done me so well for the last three months was boned.

The Shanks are a funny thing. No one really knows where they come from. You can be going along fine and out of no-where they show up. Nothing you do can get rid of them. Golf is a tough sport, and the golf swing is a complex thing. There are so many moving parts and things to factor in to get that ball to do what you want it to. Swing tempo, foot placement, grip, how far you bring the club back, where your elbows are, follow through...every swing is different but the end goal is the same. Hit that little fucker up the fairway and keep it out of the hazards.

So when you factor all the things that go into the swing and how tough it is to do anything consistently, it really is remarkable to watch shot after shot do the exact same thing. It didn't matter which club I used, how hard I swung, where I kept my feet or hands or arms...every shot took a hard right at that same 15 degree angle.

My brother was next to me analyzing my swing.

"You're not staying down on the ball"
"You're coming up to soon"
"You're babying the ball"
"Look where your feet are"

Unfortunately for someone who's never had the shanks, he didn't know that the real problem isn't physical, it's mental. I've had them once before and it makes for a miserable stretch of golf. You can try anything and everything, but if your head isn't right you're never getting your swing back. If he knew the shanks, he would have stopped with the golf instruction and bought me a shot instead. I'm not positive, but a theory of mine is there are only a few sure ways to get rid of the shanks

1) hard drugs
2) copious amounts of hard liquor
3) frequent carnal knowledge
4) death of a loved one

Those are the only four cures as far as I can tell.

I got to work on #2 before we even teed off on hole number one and was legally drunk by hole number two.

Fortunately for myself, the driver is immune to the shanks. If you're driving the ball wrong, it's a physical malady. Today my driver was the only reason I didn't put up a complete monster. Hell, I actually drove the ball as well as I have for most of the summer. 300+, typically right down the middle. On most holes I had a 60 yard pitch with the sand-wedge to the green and there's little chance to shank that shot.

On holes I had to bring out any other iron? Again, I'll set the table...

On #2 I crushed my drive, dead center down the middle of the fairway. I probably out-drove Ben, another big hitter, by 40 yards. All I had to get to the dance was about 110, a soft pitching wedge. Ben was texting someone while I swung. I took my shot, Ben looked up from his phone and asked, "Where'd you go?". I pointed directly to his right at someone's yard. Ben just put his head down and walked ahead. That's the other thing with the shanks; if you have it the other golfers in your party act like you have the H1N1 virus or the Bubonic plague. They don't want to catch it.

So that's how my round went.

Driver and lob wedge were great.
4-PW = embarrassment.

Only two questions linger.

1) How long will the shanks stick around?
and
2) What brought them on in the first place?

It's always something mental with the shanks. Guilt, sorrow, anger...take your pick. Might even be karma or some kind of god telling me that I fucked up in some way recently.

Oh well. Tomorrow is new day and a new 18 holes.

2) Ben and I got some stuff for the grill after the round. I picked up a bottle of Bloody Mary mix. The grill went on as soon as I got home and the vodka came out of the freezer.

"You're making a drink already?", Ben said.
"It's not a drink, it's a Bloody Mary. It's Sunday" I said.
Ben, laughing, "I love how you rationalize that".

3) Speaking of drinks, my new favorite is the John Daly. My homey Brian of Wausau learned me a couple months ago.

Pour a generous portion of vodka into a tall glass. My preference of late is Sobieski.

Add 1 1/2 tbs of ice tea mix.

Top with lemonade and stir/shake.

Drink many.

4) I can honestly say that one positive from today's tough loss is I'll be more productive at work than I have been in months.

Typically I'll scour the net for any and everything related to the Packers and the NFL. After a loss as bad as today's I'm gonna avoid sports news like the plague. What's tough on me should be great for my company.

5)Let August of 2009 be known as the Cautionary Tale of the Green Bay Packers.

It shall forever serve as a reminder that the pre-season means total and complete dick. The Packers were unstoppable in three meaningless games. Two games into the regular season and they look like dogshit.

Moral of the story: don't tune in to the NFL until September.

6) Twitter has claimed its first Packer victim. After today's humiliating loss, linebacker Nick Barnett popped off to fans, telling them to, "KISS MY ASS". He also questioned the coaching staff and their rotations. An hour later he come back on with an apology.

You can bet that the Packers will begin imposing Twitter restrictions on their players, and it's about time.

7) OGTs

Not much of anything to be honest. This weekend was good and all but it was more like hanging out with a pal and nothing else. Eh, whatever.

8) Almost four years ago I made my last trip to Stout to party. Because I'd crashed the night before I woke up needing new clothes. I drove to a Maurices and bought what I would later consider to be the ugliest shorts I'd ever worn. I don't know what I was thinking.

I didn't wear them again after that night, until three weeks ago.

I was at home and looking through my old closet to see if there were any old clothes worth salvaging before they were set to go to St. Vinnies. I saw the old shorts and thought one thing: golfing.

Golfing is the one occasion you have to wear the ugliest checkered patterns and colors and not only look acceptable, but awesome.

So now those old and ugly shorts are a staple. If I'm golfing and they're clean (and I usually wash them after every time on the course) I'm wearing 'em.

9) On a blog I like the subject of tipping came up. This is one of those things that fascinate me, how people can have such passionate and polar opposite views. Some people are steadfast in 15% being the absolute maximum and only if the service is extraordinary. Some don't tip at all and will rationalize it in any way possible. Many people can't bring themselves to give an extra buck if it means the difference between looking cheap and looking generous.

Here's my take...

Over-tip. Always. 20% or more, for that matter. It's $15, give them $4. $20, give them $6. If you only have one or two at a bar after work give a 50% tip. If you're at a bar you regular, go 50%. Expect free drinks down the line. If you're with a group of people or a date and you've racked up a big bar bill, go nuts and give a 25-40% tip.

Big tips will never screw you over. In the end it's just a matter of a few bucks but the service you get the next time and the way you look to the people around you more than make up for the cash you fork over.

10 Things - 09/18/09

2009-09-18T17:01:00.000-05:00

Mood: Apathetic
Listening to: No Use for a Name

1 - There should be a reason to get out of bed in the morning, good or bad in my opinion. Whether it's going somewhere, seeing an old friend, making progress on a major project at work, facing the music on something you screwed up, telling yourself that today is the day you ask out that girl you've been eyeing...whatever it might be, life shouldn't be the same thing over and over. When it's not only the days but the weeks that start to blend together, that's when you should get worried.

I wouldn't say I'm worried...yet. I guess that would invoke some kind of emotion, something I lack lately. No, lately things just keep repeating, the same thing every day, the same thing every weekend. Maybe I care that I'm slowly realizing that I don't care about much in my life right now.

2 - Being scared of success has been on my mind today. My dad and I talked about it last week when discussing Ben's football team. He's on a staff with coaches that, even though their team completely sucks, are hesitant to try anything different. They won't change up the personnel, they won't try new plays or formations. You have to ask yourself that if you're gonna lose huge by doing the same things you've always done, where is the harm in trying something new?

Today I hosted an email marketing meeting. It actually got heated when people defended their positions on a number of matters. I like that. It sparks debate, ideas are floated and people seem more apt to say how they really feel. Ideas bring about change. Change is good.

Now I think about my own life. Time and time again I'm given the choice of status-quo or radical change. Time and time again I choose to keep things the way they are. It isn't that I'm particularly satisfied with my life. Maybe it's because if I change and it doesn't work out I'll feel like this right here is as good as my life will get and that's sort of depressing. But I know that there are ways I could be infinitely happier and I can't seem to bring myself to go after that.

Then again, when I look back on the times I've been truly happy or something has gone well for me, it took (what seemed to me at the time) a good amount of risk, some work and some initiative. In the end maybe there wasn't any risk at all. It just meant changing my approach or thought process or my modus operandi. I'd say 9 out of 10 times I've been happy I stepped out onto the ledge. I think it's time to do so again...I'm just not sure for what.

But something needs to change.

3 - For some reason the high point of my week seems to come when I either

a) finish cleaning the place to the point where it's spotless
b) right after I hit my drive on hole number one if I'm golfing alone. Golfing with someone else doesn't seem to bring the same kind of peace of mind. I like being alone on the course, iPhone on and the earbuds in, just walking my way up the fairway as the sun is starting to go down in the evening.

So cleaning and golf. The only two things I look forward to anymore.

4 - My mom is pissed at me. My cousin and a best friend as a kid got married in Cancun a couple months ago. Now he's having another ceremony and party up here at his folks' place in Minnesota. My mom wanted a picture of me, him and my other cousin Sara. It's a big deal for her because we've been taking the same pic of us at different stages of our lives for years. Graduations, weddings, other special occasions.

I will not be attending.

For one, it would have required me to take the afternoon off and I don't have a lot of PTO left. Second, I love my family but all those people would be too much to handle. I'm not in a party and social state of mind right now. Lastly, I don't want to be reminded that I'm the oldest of us three and I'm the only one not married. Not only that, I'm no where fucking close to getting married. It's not a huge deal unless it's right there in my face.

I think had I told my mom she would have understood. Instead I made up some bullshit excuse related with work and now she's mad at me.

5 - The general incompetence of Milwaukee Bucks' GM John Hammond is absolutely astounding.

In the NBA, you have to be either really good or really bad. There is no where in-between if your franchise is to have some kind of direction. The best teams, the contenders, have superstar talent. That talent is always acquired with a high draft pick because the prior year that team was one of the worst in the league. The Cavaliers were the worst team in the NBA in the early 2000s. They got the #1 overall pick because of it and took LeBron James. The Magic were terrible, got the top pick one year and took Dwight Howard. The Rockets and Hakeem Olajuwan. Bulls and Jordan. Celtics and Bird. Lakers and Magic. Magic and Shaq. Hornets and Paul.

It's how the NBA works. You have to get really bad before you can get really good.

Unfortunately for the Bucks, their GM is content on being a middle of the pack team. He refuses to clear salary, play the young guys, go through a rebuilding season or two and get high draft picks. Despite this being the ONLY way to compete long term (it's been this way for over 30 years), he's fine with paying mid-level talent and shooting for .500 ball.

Someone I know used to say that your above average NBA fan, someone with knowledge of the draft and how contracts work and the basics of team building, could do an NBA GM's job. I would laugh and say he's nuts.

Now I'm 100% in his corner. There isn't a shred of doubt in my mind that I could do Hammond's job. I have no professional experience, I'm simply a fan that knows a lot about the NBA and I know with every fiber of my being I could have the Bucks in a better position than this fucking moron.

6 - I love where this season of Supernatural is heading. Ben and I both agreed that last night's episode was the best in years.

*

8 - I'm giving serious thought to getting the car when I'm done with work and driving West. No destination in mind, just driving until I've had enough. I might not stop until I see the Pacific Ocean. It's 1749.4 miles to Seattle, Washington. I could be there by this time tomorrow. Stop along the way to take come pictures. Grab one of the Pacific, turn around and come right back.

It's a coin flip at this point.

9) I'll finish later.

10 Things

2009-09-14T13:04:00.000-05:00

Ten Things I Think I Think (the deuce)

Mood: Pleased
Listening to: The Wreckers - Stand Still, Look Pretty

Yea, so it's back.

The last incarnation of the 10 things blog was a fun (at least for me), sort of interesting look into the head of a dude. Sports, politics, current events, food, dating, times with friends, whatever...I wrote about everything. If it was going through my head it inevitably found it's way into the blog. My first entry was on May 1st, 2006. The last was on September 14th, 2008. In between there were hundreds of entries, the total amount of pages adding up to the size of your typical Tom Clancy novel. Sometimes I wrote daily and the stuff came out easily; other times I knew I hadn't written in a week and I had to force myself to write. It wasn't for public viewing. I mostly wrote it so days, months and years later I could look back at things I'd written and smile when remembering how I felt about something on that particular day. Sometimes people would find out I was writing a blog and if they wanted access I usually gave it to them. By the end of its run the 10 things had around six thousand total views not counting my own. So I was sort of proud that not only would someone care to read what I'd written, but that they would return for subsequent entries.

But anyway, it's been exactly a year since I've done this. Seems like as good a time as any to get back up off the mat.

1) Social media will get me fired one day.

Blogs, Twitter, Facebook, message boards, instant messaging...if you're someone with a number of interests, wired-in friends and access to the internet at your job, it's damn near fucking impossible to stay focussed. Hell, in-between the first paragraph and #1 on this list I had to take a break to check the usual sites for updates on anything I may have missed in the last twenty minutes (Brian Urlacher is out of the season, by the way). Every once in a while I step back and marvel at the absurdity of it all.

Last night I was watching the Packers take on the Bears. I didn't know, nor did I care, that the MTV VMAs were on. But on a site I frequent a new thread with the topic, "Kanye does it again..." had started. Thirty seconds later Neder IM's me with the details. That same moment Twitter is blowing up with the incident. Ten minutes later there's video on Perez Hilton's site. Five minutes later it's tweeted that Swift and her mom were seen crying hysterically backstage. Minutes later there's a tweet that Kanye was kicked out of the show. Liza asks if I want to kick Kanye's ass. My brother comes home from his classroom and the first thing out of his mouth and it isn't about the game, it's, "Can you believe what Kanye did?".

This is all in a span of about thirty minutes. I never once flipped over to MTV. I didn't even care to know about what happened. But just from having a computer, the internet and a phone I couldn't avoid knowing.

Now, this is all happening on a Sunday night. It would be great if the world stopped Monday through Friday, 8:00-5:00 pm, but it doesn't. So when I don't have something pressing to do at work, my day is usually spent in a constant search for up to the minute information. It's scary but my system is that I can go from one bookmarked site to the next, and by the time I'm finished with my last site I know there's probably updates on the first. Rince, wash, repeat. Always repeat. Unless I've got a project desperately needing my attention, I can spend all day just combing 12 websites.

I'm not saying this is awesome. I'm saying it's an addiction. I don't know when it happened, but information (even the most mundane) became a drug. I'm not the only one hooked, either. I have pals that are the exact same way. We send each other updates on AIM or our phones. If something is even fifteen minutes late, you get ripped for being behind or slow. What scares me, though, is where does this take a turn? What happens when one of us gets a job that actually requires eight hours of attention? What will the withdrawal process be like?

I'm nervous.

1b. Classic example. My favorite place to get lunch is a spot called Cicione's. I love it because I can call for takeout, it's only a couple blocks away, I'm in and out in a minute and I can eat in my car once I'm back at work. That way I keep the AM radio on, listen in on the conversations and not miss anything if something breaks.

1c. Ironically, on the way to Cicione's, a radio host was talking about this very topic. He was describing the new Red Zone channel on DirecTV. It's on Sunday afternoons and the host brings you to live NFL games when a team is in the red-zone (inside the 20 yard line). No commercials, there's always action, it's fantastic.

The radio host described the reason it was so outstanding. He doesn't want commercials, or recaps, or having to wait.

"In today's caffeinated society, I want more, quicker."

Couldn't have said it better myself.

Work is pressing. Nine more later.

*****

3) I don't get someone like Kanye West.

OK, the VMAs are probably complete bullshit. That seems to be what I'm hearing from people that want to defend Kanye.

"He was making a statement! The VMAs are a joke and he was simply pointing it out. This has nothing to do with Taylor Swift." I've heard that a couple times.

I don't watch the VMAs. I couldn't name a song from 90% of those in attendance. But the fact that it's full of crappy artists that make crappy music isn't the point. It obviously meant a whole lot to Taylor Swift, who as we know was crying her ass off afterwords. So all he accomplished was making himself look like an ass and hurting a young teenage girl.

Prick.

3a) OK, then they defend his status. He's amazing and has earned the right to do whatever the hell he wants. Today I read someone say he's the closest thing to Michael Jackson since Michael Jackson. My response was if he fell off the face of the planet right now, how many people would even give two shits? Michael Jackson died and the world stopped for almost a week. Everyone talked about him. News coverage 24/7. CNN basically blew up. It was the first time in years you could play your favorite MJ tune and get universal thumbs up.

On the other hand, I guarantee there were thousands of middle age white people that turned to CNN today and saw the headline about Swift and Kanye and wondered, "Who the hell is this guy?"

3b)Alright, then it's his artistic ability. Nobody puts together better rhymes. I swear to god, I read this today:

"The final verse in Gone is one of the best damn set of lyrics ever written. If you don't honestly believe that, I seriously question your tastes in music."

Wait, you mean this?

Uh-uh-uh uh uh onnn, uh uh-uh onnn
Uh-uh onnn, uh uh-uh I'mmmm
Ah-head of my time, sometimes years out
So the powers that be won't let me get my ideas out
And that make me wanna get my advance out
And move to Oklahoma and just live at my Aunt's house
Yeah, I romance the thought of leavin it all behind
Kanye step away from the lime-
-light, like, when I was on the grind
In the "One, Nine, Nine, Nine"
Before, model chicks was bendin over or
Dealerships asked me Benz or Rover, man
If I could just get one beat on Hova
We could get up off this cheap-ass sofa
What the summer of the Chi got to offer an 18-year-old
Sell drugs or get a job, you gotta play gyro
My dawg worked at Taco Bell, hooked us up plural
Fired a week later the manager count the churros
Sometimes I can't believe it when I look up in the mirrow
How we out in Europe, spendin Euros
They claim you never know what you got 'til it's GONE
I know I got it, I don't know what y'all on
I'ma open up a store for aspiring MC's
Won't sell 'em no dream, but the inspiration is free
But if they ever flip sides like Anakin
You'll sell everything includin the mannequin
They got a new bitch now you Jennifer Aniston
Hold on I'll handle it, don't start panickin, stay calm
Shorty's at the door cause they need more
Inspiration for they life, they souls, and they songs
They said sorry Mr. West is gone!

Yea....I can totally see the sick lyricism. I was totally feeling the part about the churros. Fucking amazing.

I hate people.

4) Hollywood has become one, big, steaming pile of dogshit. TV on the otherhand...

For years I slammed TV. It wasn't exactly a leap to say that the little box was churning out a mind-numbing amount of crap. Reality shows, TMZ, MTV, Charlie Sheen...there was an absurd amount of crap. It didn't help that even the most critically acclaimed shows were pretty damn boring. The Wire and Six Feet Under were coma inducing and only cool if you wanted to up your hipness for being in on how underrated they were. The Sopranos was up and down. House is the same episode every damn week. There are about two million CSIs. Even shows that once had promise like Heroes quickly took a dive.

But recently? There's actually a decent amount to like.

Start on Bravo and Top Chef. It's reality TV for people with a brain. No sordid affairs and fighting. It's cooking from start to end and seeing some of the amazing creations these cats come up with is enough to make your jaw drop.

Next head on over to the Food Network. I could list a couple shows, but honestly, everything on this network is gold. Diners, Drive-ins and Dives is a reason to stay home on a Friday night.

One of the best shows in recent memory just ended...

Battlestar Galactica was simply amazing. I didn't come aboard until Season 4, the last, but rolling through the DVDs was worth it. I recommend it to anyone and everyone. They never watch. One, it has a stupid name (not the current show's fault. It's actually a remake of a campy 70s show). Second, it's on the Sci-Fi Network, and no dude that ever wants to get laid again will admit to watching that channel.

BUT! Here's a transcript of a chat I recently had with one of my main dudes.

Mike: I had a buddy try and get me to watch BSG

Me: I take it you didn't dig it

Mike: i didnt watch yet

Me: Give it an honest chance. Sit through the three hour mini-series and try and watch the first few episodes

I honestly don't know how anyone could watch the series and not think it's one of the top two or three shows of the 00's

Mike: My buddy has great taste so I will take his word and check it out

Me: I have great taste motherfucker and I've been saying it for a year!

Mike: He put it up there with the Wire in terms of depth, accuracy, acting

and no you dont

Me: lol

Mike: you told me your favorite show was Everybody Loves Raymond

Me: Oh shut the fuck up

Mike: remember, you were trying to decide if that was your #1 or King of Queen

Me: Dude.

Mike: im fucking with you

Me: Dick

The other two shows in the last couple years I won't stop recommending are Psych and Supernatural. Both are hour long dramadies.

Psych:

Supernatural:

Do yourself a favor and tune in.

5) I've been mildly depressed about the knee lately. I demolished it back in January, tore the ACL, MCL and lateral meniscus. I had my surgery back in late Febrary. I still have pain and discomfort every day even though I don't really walk with a limp anymore. But the normal everyday pain I can live with. It sucks that it's eight months and I'm still no where near 100%, but that's not what gets me.

After my surgery my doc told me that the meniscus was much worse than the MRI revealed. He said it looked like a shark went in and took a bite out of it and that it was essentially gone from my knee and was beyond repair. This was disheartening for the following reason...

Without the meniscus present, the weight of your body would be unevenly applied to the bones in your legs (the femur and tibia). This uneven weight distribution would cause excessive forces in specific areas of bone leading to early arthritis of knee joint. Therefore, the function of the meniscus is critical to the health of your knee.

He told me that high impact sports, even jogging or running, would be a no-no for the rest of my life. Forget baseball, basketball, football, etc. I've tried jogging lately. I can go for about 20 seconds before the searing pain in my left knee is too much.

My health right now isn't a huge concern. There are bikes, swimming, ellipticals, etc. What fucking kills ms is that I probably won't be able playing a lot of one on one with my kid someday. I grew up playing sports with and against my dad. It's sort of heartbreaking knowing that I'm not gonna be able to do that.

6) On a lighter note, my bro is now interested in cooking. Saturday I made my crowd pleasing chicken and chorizo soup. Just like the last time, it didn't last long. I got TWO BOWLS out of a massive kettle. Ben wolfed down the rest for breakfast, lunch and dinner.

But it did get him thinking about what he might be able to make. At first he suggested I make another soup. He was thinking potato. I told him I'd be happy to tomorrow. Apparently, tomorrow was too late. He called my mom for some pointers, drove to the store to get ingredients and he's in the kitchen right now concocting his first homemade dish.

But anyway, here's my ridiculously quick and easy recipe.

Chicken & Chorizo Soup

* 2 pounds chicken breasts
* 1 pound chorizo sausage, in packaged meats case near kielbasa
* 2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
* 1 red bell pepper, chopped
* 1 medium onion, chopped
* 2 cans of corn, drained
* 6 small red potatoes, diced
* 1 15-ounce can fire roasted chopped tomatoes
* 1 15-ounce can dark red kidney beans, drained
* 2 teaspoons Frank's hot sauce
* white and black ground pepper to taste
* 1 tablespoon ground peppercorns
* 1 tablespoon Italian spice
* 1/2 tablespoon chopped red pepper
* 42 oz chicken stock
* 1 bag tortilla chips
* shredded mexican blend cheese
* sour cream

Bake the chicken breasts, covered in tin-foil, at 400 degrees for 20 minutes.

Cook the chorizo in a small skillet.

In the meantime chop, cook and simmer the potatoes, onion, pepper in a large dutch oven. Stir regularly to avoid burning.

Remove the chicken and chop into small bite-sized pieces. Drain the chorizo and add all the meat to the dutch oven. Stir in the drained corn and beans. Add the tomatoes and stir. Cook covered for five minutes, stirring occasionally.

Add the chicken stock, oil and spices. Stir and simmer, covered, for 10 minutes.

Serve and top with cheese, dollop of sour cream and crushed tortilla chips.

7) Patrick Swayze passing on is a fucking downer. Ben and I must have watched Point Break twenty times, many in the last year. Every once in a while I'd get a "Nah, you pull it!" on my Facebook wall. Ben would get a "Vaya con Dios" on his.

Cancer is a bitch.

8) It's not often that I laugh so hard my face hurts.

But tonight...

Mr. Pearlman is one of my idols. I love his writing, I absolutely love his blog. He's been published and is a regular on the NY Times best seller list. He currently writes for Sports Illustrated but has never failed to write back when I drop him a line.

That said, I just came upon this tonight when he shared that vid with his audience.

Jeff Pearlman, thank you.

9) I used to say, in a smug sort of way, that I didn't care about any music (outside of Hendrix) made before I was born. Not sure why I did that. I think it was because of the Beatles and disco. Hate 'em both.

I think I've seen the light if my iTunes is any indication.

The Police
Boston
Foreigner
The Doors
Bob Seger
The Rolling Stones
Meatloaf
AC/DC
Genesis

All regulars.

10) Obligatory girl thoughts

I am, and maybe forever will be, the go-to guy when my lady-friends have guy issues. It was that way in college, and it seems to have followed me from Marshfield to Wisconsin Rapids to Wausau to Mankato to Eau Claire. I really don't know how or why it happened, but the list of girls that have come to me for dude-advice is now probably somewhere in the 20s. It's at times maddening and frustrating and flattering.

I still remember house parties in college and a female friend of mine would grab and pull me into my room, close the door, sit me down on my bed and then ask why her boyfriend is acting the way he does.

:/

OK, maybe a little emasculating. Sure.

Over the years there's been a common theme. Girls dating douchebags. Most of the time, it's not tough to spot the douchebag.

Unfortunately for women the d-bag detector often malfunctions as the smooth lines hit their ears. Reasonably intelligent, self-confident women turn into "Was it something I said?" and "But he told me he cared" puddles of shit. I used to empower them. Maybe my responses made them feel better and allowed them to rationalize anything that may be wrong in their relationships. Not sure I can do that any longer.

Ladies, I implore you. Pull your heads out of your asses.

Stop rationalizing. Stop with the cop-outs that all guys are assholes. Stop asking questions you already know the answers to.

Whether I tell you or not, I'm offended when I hear how awful men are and how there's no one for you.

Sure, there are some bad guys out there. There are guys that will only look for a hookup and forget about you. These dicks aren't representative of men, they're representative of the people you hang out with. Find some better company.

Every time I hear a sob story I think of my pals. Guys with personality and stable careers and pets and treat women like their life-long friends and soul mates. These guys that wouldn't dare do a woman wrong or lie.

Good guys are out there. Trust me.